Twists and Turns
by raven-flighton
Summary: Five years, to the day, since Derek told Karen that he did understand love, the latest Houston and Leavitt production is in trouble. Even though they have Karen in a lead role, they've just got rid of a terrible director. Now they're on the look out for a new director, Eileen wants to hire Derek. However, there are ghosts from Derek's past that will pop up on the road to Broadway.
1. We Have No Director

"Tom, Listen to this," Julia sighed, wielding a paper in front of her as she sat at the kitchen counter "As Houston and Leavitt embark on their most ambitious project yet, a musical adaptation of the life of the Bröntes, they find themselves hampered by yet another set back. Morgan Hallaway has taken his directing talents elsewhere. Today, Eileen Rand announced that there had been some artistic disagreements in-"

Snorting, Tom shook his head "That's one way of putting it! He wanted to go all Roger's and Hammerstein on Brönte!"

"You mean like he does on all his productions," Sam pointed out coolly, as he sipped his coffee.

Angrily, Tom nodded "Exactly, why did we even hire him?"

"Didn't I ask you that question, two months ago, when you first hired Morgan?" Sam winked, fondly.

With an irritated pout, Tom retorted "Well just because you're always right."

"If you'd let me finish," Julia smiled, fondly, at the couple and continued "In rehearsals and that it was decided Hallaway was not the right director for this piece. She also tells us that it can be expected that another director will be found within the month."

Quirking a dark eyebrow, Sam said with deep sarcasm "Wouldn't that be a miracle?"

"Good luck Eileen, just because you hire Karen Cartwright and it's Houston and Leavitt doesn't mean you're going to get another Bombshell," Julia finished, tracing a finger around the rim of her coffee cup.

Tom sighed "Everyone's a critic."

The three of them were sat round the kitchen in the apartment that Tom and Sam shared. All three trying not to dwell on the fact that their current project, _Brönte_, was floundering fast. It was, seemingly, cursed. It had a dark plot, required a huge cast, including children, needed a complicated plot and a score like nothing they'd written before. So, as if being half-finished wasn't enough, the show had faced any number of trials. The critics continually baited it, even before it had begun, determined to see it flop.

"Of course they are, it's theatre," Sam pointed out, reaching out to take Tom's hand in comfort "But you know they're always wrong, so what's the problem?"

Looking at his boyfriend with something like thankfulness, Tom smiled "How are we ever going to get this thing off the ground without a director or a finished score, never mind book. Not to mention the fact that nothing in rehearsals has worked this far. I know this is supposed to be t_he_ project but it just feels wrong lately."

"It's not over yet, Tom," Julia commented, her eyes wondering to the binder of notes and fragments that sat treacherously on the counter. It stared, threatening to betray its nonsensical contents were not what they claimed to be; Leavitt and Houston's best musical yet. Anxiously, she swept the binder into her bag "Bombshell had the same problems at the start, so did Heaven on Earth, it's just a new set of challenges."

With a sigh, Tom rubbed circles on the back of Sam's hand "Somehow it's harder this time though."

"That's just because you're getting older," Sam teased, kissing Tom's cheek as he stood "Now I've got a date to make, with Ivy." He retreated to the door, jacket in hand.

Blinking out of a sort of daze, Tom called after him "Don't tell her anything, about the show I mean, you know we don't want the cast to panic."

"I know," Sam rolled his eyes "But Ivy'll figure it out anyway, she's just smart like that." Then, his cynical expression faded and he smiled empathetically "Good luck with Eileen."

Julia downed the dregs of her coffee "Thanks, we're gonna need it."

One last smile and Sam was out the door, leaving the writing duo alone in the apartment.

"Damn, you two are so cute," she smiled at her partner.

Bashfully, he shrugged "We try. How're Frank and Leo?"

"Same as always," Julia dropped her mug into the basin by her side and ran the hot tap. Washing things was therapeutic to her, a by-product of being a mother. So she moved their dirty mugs into the water and began to scrub them clean "Leo says he likes Columbia, he's met a girl, won't talk about her much at the moment but that's only to be expected."

Staying her hand with his, Tom frowned "Julia you don't need to wash up at my place."

"It's all right," she smiled as serenely as she could "I want to."

With a sigh, he shook his head "God help us when we get near opening if you're already cleaning nervously now."

"Shut up," Julia dried off her hands and checked her watch "We better go, it's time to face the depleted creation team."

As he passed her her coat, he checked himself in the mirror "Well Julia, we're already half-way there." She eyed him curiously and he chuckled in explanation "Without Morgan, you and I are two thirds of the creative team." On that note they shuffled out of the door and into the world outside.

eeeeee

Elizabeth sat cross-legged on a bench in central park, licking her ice-cream and staring absently into space. Beside her, her boyfriend tried to catch her attention but ultimately failed to compete with her thoughts. Falling back on the seat, he stared out at the people passing by "Lizzie, what's on your mind?"

"Hm?" she snapped out of her trance and met his gaze "Nothing just... wondering what comes next?"

With a roll of his eyes, he sighed "You're still thinking about your career, Jesus, do you ever stop."

"Harry," she reprimanded fondly.

Throwing his hands up in defence, he replied "Sorry, I just, I've missed you. It feels like you're never quite here, not since you got kicked off _Teenage Kicks_."

"I did not get kicked off," Elizabeth protested, standing to wander a few steps away from their quiet bench "I was dismissed because I got too old."

Cautiously, he stood and followed her "Details, look, the point is that you'll find more work soon enough, this is the city of Broadway, a new show opens every week, one of them will want you."

"It's not quite as simple as that, and you know it," she quirked a sceptical eyebrow at him. There was a lull in conversation, for a tense moment before she passed him her ice-cream "You better finish it off, I'm watching my figure."

As he took it, Harry pointed out "It's an ice-cream, it's hardly going to pile on the pounds and you have a great figure anyway."

"Being out of work means no more dance work-out every other night," she retorted "So I'll have to start watching what I eat if I want to keep audition thin."

Frowning, he threw the ice cream in the bin and took her hand "I hate this business, I mean you're talented and I love watching you perform but I hate that you have to worry about keeping "audition thin" or "stage pretty" or all the other stuff you come out with. You're perfect, you shouldn't have to change for anyone."

That brought a lightness to her heart that almost made her forget about all the worries she had. Even though those doubts still lingered, she decided to leave them for now and simply pulled Harry a little closer "How did I find someone as great as you?"

"The feeling's mutual," he chuckled, planting a quick peck on her cheek before pulling her towards the fountain. The two were just another couple mingling with the crowds but she stood out. Something about Elizabeth just screamed star. There were her jet black curls which fell over her shoulders in waves and hypnotic amber eyes that could draw you in across an auditorium. Not only was she phenomenally talented but she had a natural draw that just made her shine.

"Lizzie!" Karen caught the girl's hand in the crowd, smiling.

Her face lit up at the sight of her old friend "Karen, hi!"

The two actresses hugged as Harry stood awkwardly by. It had been six years since Elizabeth had left Les Miserables, where she had played young Eponnine and Karen had played the same part, only older. Still though they kept in touch and Karen had been a great help to Elizabeth as she began her career. Maybe it was Karen who could clear her head when all she had done lately was worry.

"So what are you up to?" Elizabeth asked as they steered away from the crowd to talk.

With a shrug, Karen replied "Working on that show with Houston and Leavitt."

"I read about that," she glanced at Harry and squeezed his hand "Haven't you just lost your director?"

Holding up a finger to silence her, Karen chuckled "Don't even go there. What about you, found anything new?"

"No, no-one wants to hire someone my age," Elizabeth shrugged.

A flash of sympathy darted through Karen's eyes a second before she looked back over her shoulder "Look, Lizzie, I gotta run, Julia's gonna meet with me and fill me in on what's going on."

"Right, yeah," Elizabeth nodded, trying to hide her disappointment.

The older girl smiled empathetically "I'll ask around for you, someone must be looking for a sixteen year old."

"Seventeen," she corrected.

With a giggle, Karen amended "Seventeen year old, you better reply to my next email."

"I will, don't worry," Elizabeth told her as she led Harry off into the crowd.

Once she was alone, Karen let out a sigh of relief. Truthfully, there was no meeting with Julia for another hour, it's just she wanted to be alone for awhile. Though usually she would have kept Elizabeth talking for at least half an hour before releasing her, today she just wanted to think. Today was the anniversary of her first preview of bombshell.

It was exactly five years since Derek had told her that he did understand love and maybe she had believed him then, she couldn't really remember. All that consumed her mind were the secret glances they shared in the weeks that followed, those ones that made her heart feel like it might jump from her chest. That foolish hope that made her almost believe he could love her, really love her not the way he'd "loved" all his leading ladies before.

Then came the heartbreaking moment that they'd been in a rehearsal together, just the two of them. As he read her lines and she channelled Marilyn, he'd just leant an inch closer so his breath mingled with hers as his hand resting gently on her upper thigh. It wasn't that which had made her slap him, however, it was the wicked look in his eyes and the way he whispered "You know, I make a point of having an intimate relationship with all of my leading ladies."

In a shot she drew her hand hard across his cheek and leapt back with tears in her eyes "I thought you were better than that Derek, exactly what kind of girl do you think I am?"

"A beautiful one."

That was not the answer that Karen was looking for, all she could think about were all the girls that Derek had cast aside without a thought. She knew she couldn't be one of those girls. Damn it, directors shouldn't be allowed to make advances towards actresses and know they'd be accepted because these girls were completely under their thumbs. It wasn't fair and she wouldn't be that girl.

Running for the door, she only glanced back once to say "Goodbye Derek."

With a shudder, she came back to reality and wondered what would have happened if she hadn't left bombshell for Les Miserables. What she would have done if she'd gone back to rehearsals the next day and he'd apologized. If she'd been brave enough to face him down, maybe he would have taken her seriously. Maybe she wouldn't have spent five years wondering what if?

dddddd

Derek leant back on the sofa in Eileen's office and tried to feel comfortable. After a few moments he resigned himself to the fact that nothing about this was comfortable. Not only was he being brought in by the producer behind the writers' backs but one of those writers was Tom bloody Leavitt who just happened to hate his guts. This was not comfortable. That was even before you factored in the fact that the production had already suffered at the hands of an incompetent and inappropriate director (he could have told them months ago that Morgan wasn't right for this show) and the writers would be on edge. And then there was Karen.

Working with Karen again was something that scared him. Scratch that – she was something that terrified him. This was a girl that could make him feel things he thought he'd closed himself to over a decade before. Love was something he knew too deeply for him to fully comprehend. He buried it to save his aching heart, love wasn't safe. Therefore, Karen wasn't safe. Already, she'd cast him off once and it had almost killed him.

"Derek?" Eileen brought him out of his reminiscence.

As he blinked back to the present, he sat up "Yes, sorry?"

"Tom and Julia will be here soon," she repeated with a certain reproach in her expression.

Awkwardly, Derek sat up straight "Eileen, are you sure you want to cause this much trouble, I know I can work wonders with this piece but Tom's still going to go through hell to keep me away from this show."

"At the moment I'm just concentrating on you doing wonders with this piece, I'll get through to Tom," she replied, stroking a lock of dark hair behind her ear.

He nodded "Well, I'll leave that to you."

It was then that Eileen wandered out into the foyer to greet Tom and Julia, leaving Derek to his own thoughts once more. Restlessness taking over him, Derek walked over to the window to stare out of the window at the New York skyline. This was his city, his theatres and his people. Who gave a damn about Tom or... or any of the other obstacles that stood between him and this show, he had a vision for it and he'd get his hands on it if he had to kill for the chance.

"Are you kidding?" Tom's voice echoed from the small foyer and he stormed through into the office "Good morning, Derek."

With a snide smile, he turned round to face his old nemesis "Nice to see you again Tom."

"And you're trying to sabotage another of my shows, are you?" he asked, lifting his chin in contempt.

Rolling his eyes, Derek snorted "I have never sabotaged any of your shows Tom, you just have this insane paranoia about me being out to get you."

"It's not insane if I'm right," he snapped back defensively before he realised how ridiculous he sounded and took a step back.

As the two women entered the room, Derek addressed Julia rather than Tom "I know I can do something spectacular with this show, I've listened to the demo and I've heard the gossip from Ivy. This is a good show and I know I can do it justice."

"And I believe him," Eileen added, walking to the director's side.

With a semi-resigned sigh, Julia admitted "I'm believe you too, Derek, but-" she glared at Tom for his sudden protestations "-the press have given us enough stick for hiring Karen, we hire Derek and they'll skin us alive."

"So we fire Karen," Derek suggested, suddenly seeing all the awkwardness that could occur from working with Karen disappear before his eyes.

His relief was clearly not shared by his three companions. Even Eileen looked at him as though he'd just suggested they burn Broadway down using the original script of Rent as kindling. Of course, it was Tom who told him sternly "Karen is the only one who understood the show inside out even with Morgan mixing everything up, she just blew everything else out of the drama studio."

"That's not what I heard from Ivy," Derek said before he thought about it.

Sitting down on the sofa, Julia pointed out "Ivy hates Karen, what used to be a competitive rivalry has grown into a hate so strong you feel a cool breeze in the room when they stand next to each other."

"Screw the press," Eileen declared suddenly, making all the heads in the room turn towards her "They don't run Broadway we do, this show is not Bombshell and never will be even if we hire Michael Smith to play Branwell."

Quickly, Julia intersected "Which we're not doing."

"The point is that it is our responsibility to do what is best for this show," Eileen continued, looked pointedly at Derek "And this director _is_ what's best for this show."

There was an elongated pause when everyone turned to Tom for the ultimate answer. Pursing his lips, he groaned "Fine, but so help me Derek, if you hurt my baby I will murder you in the most slow and painful way you can imagine."

"Since when do you refer to your work as your baby?" asked Derek sceptically.

He turned to go, walking towards the door with Julia in toe before answering "Since we started to write a musical that could change the face of Broadway forever." All at once, Derek fell a whole lot more pressure.


	2. Changes

**Author Note – I realised on reading back my previous chapter that I've been spelling Brontë wrong so, from here on in, my spelling of it will be different.**

Karen dropped her bag at the back of the room like she always did, waving slightly to Julia as the creative team took their seats. Churning inside her were nerves she hadn't felt in years, this was Derek's first rehearsal. Even though, she was well aware that Derek was a brilliant director and was certainly right for this show, there was something in her that longed for him to quit. She wasn't sure she could deal with working with him again.

"Hey you," Charlie fell in beside her, smiling lightly "You feeling okay, you look a little pale."

Faking a smile, Karen replied "I'm fine Charlie, just worried about the new director."

"But haven't you worked with Derek Wills before?" he asked "On Bombshell?"

With a long-suffering look in Charlie's direction, she nodded "And I left Bombshell." A look of realisation crossed his face, understanding flashing in his blue eyes.

Just as he opened his mouth to ask another question the door open and Derek marched in with a purpose. To Karen it felt strangely familiar, like not a day had passed since the last time she had stared at the dark director across a rehearsal room.

The whole room fell silent, each small group halting their conversation to observe the entrance of the infamous man. He didn't even blink at the attention, just went through his usual routine. Coat and scarf passed to some poor runner. Bag under the desk. Script on the table, post-it notes protruding from the top of the folder to mark the scenes he wanted to work on and his thoughts on each. It was only now that Karen had worked with other directors that she understood the true magic of that ability. In the years she'd skipped from show to show, she'd met many directors who would have killed for that ability. Some had to scream and shout to be heard, others were too shy and retiring to gain any respect. Derek just entered a room and was perfectly comfortable with being the centre of attention.

Slowly, like a lion observing his captive prey, he looked up. As though a magnetic field pulled his eyes to hers, he caught Karen's gaze and she shivered through the connection. Clearing his throat, he surveyed the room and walked round the table so he was stood in front of them on equal terms "Good morning everyone, I'm Derek Wills you're new director. I'm aware that Morgan Hallaway has royally screwed this all around so I'm going to suggest we all forget everything he'd said and done and move right on. Any objections?"

Silence.

"Good," he strolled into the centre of the room "Let's start with the opening, everyone with lines in the scene, centre, everyone else, find somewhere out of the way to sit."

As Karen scuttled out of the way, she watched Derek work. Easily he explained how he wanted them to move, playing people like puppets that moved beautifully in his hands. She was so wrapped up in watching him that she almost missed him call the three adult Brontë sisters to the centre. Awkwardly she rushed up to join Debbie and Leah, positioning herself in-between them on instinct.

With a quick glance over the three of them, Derek questioned "Right so, Karen you're Emily and... Leah you're Charlotte-"

"I'm Anne," Leah corrected "Debbie's Charlotte."

Though he was clearly off-set by this statement, he continued "Well, anyway, I want to start the show with you three singing the maid's parts, so you'll have to change between then and scene six but I think it'll add an interesting dimension to the piece. Do you know it?"

"Yes," Karen answered, while the other two replied that they didn't know it that well.

Smirking quietly, Derek chuckled "Always ready to step to the fold, Karen." She blushed, practically feeling the eyes boring into the back of her head – namely Ivy's. Nevertheless, he quickly moved on, organising the scene around her before he set them going.

As they started to run the scene, the other two girls holding vocal books in front of them as they went, Karen realised that she hadn't felt this insecure in a rehearsal room since Bombshell. What was it about this man that set her on edge. Then again, what was it about this man that made her feel so alive?

dddddd

It was the end of the day and the creative team were once again gathered in Eileen's office. Leaning on the sill of the window, Derek could feel anticipation for the battle he was about to start knotting inside him. In truth he enjoyed arguing his point, he liked the thrill of the fight, especially when he was right. The fighting partners that he had in Tom and Julia, sat oblivious on the sofa just waiting for battle. Maybe he was just sadistic that way.

Sat in her arm chair, Eileen was the one who started off the conversation "So Derek, what do you think of our little show?"

"It's good," he began, swaggering into the centre of the room "And you were right, Karen does know the show inside out but I'm not sure about the way Anne's been cast."

Immediately, Tom sat up, sensing a fight "Leah's phenomenal."

"Leah's too old," Derek countered "Which wouldn't matter if it weren't for the fact that Karen and Debbie are so obviously younger than her."

With a shrug, Tom brushed him off "Artistic licence."

"For pity's sake Tom, there's artistic licence and there's a bad depiction, it just doesn't work and I say we get rid of her and hire another girl," Derek protested with determination.

Eyeing her writing partner wearily, Julia admitted "I agree and I really like what you've done with the opening Derek."

"Thank you," he responded, mildly stunned by her support.

Rather dramatically, Tom turned to his friend "Will you back me up here?"

"I'll say what I think, Tom," she sighed "And I think that good casting is really important for this show and you said exactly the same thing when Morgan first cast Leah."

As the memory surfaced in his mind, Tom folded his arms "But she's really good."

"Lots of people are good," Eileen interjected "But they're not always right for your show."

With a smile, Derek realised he'd won "So can I audition girls?"

Before anyone could answer him, Julia's phone chimed. She jumped at the sound, quickly bringing it to her ear and answering. There was an unusual wideness to her eyes, however, and a thinness to her lips that told her friends she was worried about this call. As the conversation continued her expression only darkened.

Supportingly, Tom reached across to put his hand on her leg and Derek couldn't help but think that a straight man would never get away with that. His train of thought was cut short by Julia ending her call.

Face pale, she turned to Tom "Leo's in the hospital, he's got knocked down by a taxi."

"Oh sweetie," his face cracked in sympathy "Is he okay?"

Taking a laboured breath, she replied "They think so but I really need to get down there, could you meet up with Karen to fill her in on everything?"

"I can't, I promised Sam we'd go out tonight, he's got a surprise all planned," Tom bit his lip, shaking his head "He'd be heartbroken if I blew him off."

She turned to Eileen, hopefully "Could you?"

"I'm meeting with investors tonight," she frowned.

Then, Derek surprised everyone by offering "I'll go." Seeing all their confused expressions made him quirk his eyebrows incredulously "I know Karen too, you know, I'll be happy to tell her what's going on."

"Thanks Derek, you're meeting her in Nick's bar," Julia didn't need any more encouragement to dart out of the door. For a moment, Derek let himself wonder what it would be like to have that sort of responsibility, have someone dependent on you. To know that, if they needed you, you had to drop everything and run to help them, because you had to look after them. He shook it off, he'd never be able to deal with that.

eeeeee

Yawning, Elizabeth wandered in from school. There was nothing she hated more than trooping through six hours of useless facts and platitudes that would provide her with absolutely nothing in the future. No-one ever considered that the girl three rows from the front didn't need to know interview techniques for job interviews. Actresses didn't go for interviews, they went for auditions. Once she got another job, she was determined to drop out, no matter what her mother said to try and get her to stay in education. Her heart was on the stage and her head in the performance, no amount of schooling could change that.

"Mum, I'm home!" she shouted, dropping her school bag by the door and hanging her coat up in the cupboard.

Kate, Elizabeth's mother, emerged from the bedroom and smiled "How was school?"

Cringing, Elizabeth replied without answering "Any auditions for me?"

The smile faded from Kate's face, and she slumped in her stance "Sweetheart, something will come along eventually."

"Yeah, it will," she folded her arms and sighed "But I want it to come along now."

With that sort of smugness reserved exclusively for the use of parents, Kate pointed out "Acting isn't a stable career, that's why you have to stay in school, so you have other options when you can't perform any more."

"Have you ever given thought to the fact that I've already made it?" Elizabeth asked accusingly "I haven't been out of work for more than a couple of months since I was seven years old."

Desperately, her mother moved forward "Plenty of child actors never make the transition, Lizzie, and I've known too many girls who have lost themselves to the stage, you have to be realistic."

"I am being realistic!" she protested, feeling the heat of anger rushing through her veins "I'm not some wide-eyed girl who dreams of being on a Broadway stage, I've been there. I've lived and breathed the stage and you will not take it away from me!" Feeling like she'd made her point, she marched back towards the front door of their apartment.

Kate blinked at her "Where are you going?"

"To see Harry, he understands me a lot better than you do," with that last comment she was out the door and hurrying as far from her mother as possible.

kkkkkk

Sitting quietly at a small table at the back of the bar, Karen waited for Julia. She was beginning to get the feeling that she'd been stood up, what with Julia being almost half-an-hour late. Of course, she had no reason to think Julia would do that, she'd been a good friend to her since Bombshell. Not that Julia new about why she'd left, Karen hadn't made a habit of telling anyone. It wasn't worth the trouble. Right about now though, she was wishing she had told them, they never would have hired Derek if they'd known.

Just then, Derek slid into the chair opposite her, scotch in hand and smirk plastered across his face "Good evening Marilyn."

"Hello Derek," Karen was careful to hold her nerve and keep composed "I'm just waiting for-"

"Julia," he finished, still smirking "I know, she sent me here instead, she had to rush to the hospital, Leo got hit by a car."

Stunned, she blinked "Is he okay?"

"He's fine," Derek rolled his eyes "It's nothing fatal, the point is she sent me to fill you in on what's going on with the show."

Steeling herself, silently, she nodded "Okay, what's changing?"

"Before we get to that," his smile faded and he leant forward, moving his scotch away and clasping his hands on the table "There's something I've wanted to say for five years, something you deserve to hear and-"

Karen hugged her arms around herself nervously "I don't deserve to hear anything Derek."

"Yes you do," he cleared his throat and stammered out "I'm sorry, what I did on Bombshell was wrong and you... I should have showed you more respect but I don't... I'm not good at apologies. I can't explain what I did, all I know is that it was wrong and I never meant to cross a line. I'm sorry, really truly sorry. Now can we put that behind us and make this the best show we can?"

With a meek nod, she breathed "Yeah, yeah we can." She was sort of stunned by his apology, she'd never thought she would ever hear one from him. Something about Derek just told her that he wasn't one to apologize if he didn't mean it. It was like the time, during Bombshell, he'd come to say sorry for his behaviour in auditions, she'd just known that he'd meant it. Then again, Derek Wills was the sort of guy who said exactly what he thought no matter what anyone else thought.

"Good," he sounded so relieved that it made her smile.

Feeling much more relaxed, she asked "So what is going on in Eileen's office, then?"

"Well," Derek's face set to the one he usually wore in rehearsals – his business face. "I talked Tom and Julia into letting me recast Anne."

A jolt of empathy shot through Karen's stomach as she thought of poor Leah "But why?"

"I want someone who could actually pass as a younger sister to you and Debbie," he explained "Leah is and looks too old."

As she shook her head, pondering how unfair show-business was, something occurred to Karen "When you say someone who could pass as a younger sister, how old are we talking?"

"Early twenties," Derek's eyes glinted as he sensed she wasn't telling him something "Why?"

She didn't answer, just asked him another question "What about a seventeen year old who's experienced on Broadway, has star potential and looks old for her age?"

"You know someone?" he smirked, watching the way her face lit up with the idea of helping a young actress.

Smiling widely, Karen nodded "Derek, have you ever heard of Elizabeth Mason?"


	3. Auditioning

**Author Note – Thank you so much for all the comments, I'm so happy you all like it so much. To be honest, I've been thinking of writing it for a while and have only just managed to put my ideas down on paper. I think this one is going to be quite short because this is mainly a bridge chapter.**

Excitement bubbled fresh in Elizabeth's stomach as she packed her bag for her audition. She finally had a chance at getting some work, thank God for Karen Cartwright! There was her sheet music, slid into her bag at the side, three different songs, just in case. Then her phone and i-pod, which she took everywhere. A copy of both of Anne Brontë's novels, if she had a spare minute. Last, but not least, a bottle of water with freshly squeezed lemon and honey mixed into it. All ready to go.

On walking out of her room, she found her mother sat at the kitchen table with a stern look on her face. It was the sort of expression that made you stop dead in your tracks "Mum?"

"Don't go to this audition Lizzie," Kate stated plainly, turning her gaze up to meet her daughter's.

Irritated at Kate's seeming unsupportiveness, Elizabeth asked icily "Why?"

"This is Derek Wills," she explained "He's got more than just a reputation, he's infamous for being a ruthless director, sleeping with his actresses and-"

"Being utterly brilliant," Elizabeth finished, quirking her eyebrows as if daring her to argue against that point "He's a great director, and yes he's known for being the bad-boy of theatre but I can look after myself. Besides, Karen's there, she's not going to let anything happen to me."

Sadness filled Kate's eyes as she whimpered "I'm just worried about you sweetheart."

"I'll be fine, see you later," with that she was out of the door. So she didn't see Kate's frown deepen or her eyes fill with confused tears as they lingered on the door.

dddddd

"I'm not usually one for taking personal recommendations," Derek admitted as he took his seat in the audition room.

Raising his eyebrows teasingly, Tom asked "So you go on your own instincts do you?"

"Yes, as a matter of fact, Tom, I didn't hire Ivy on the merit of your reference," he replied, testily.

With a roll of her eyes, Eileen began to get herself settled "Put the claws away ladies, we're going to give her exactly the same consideration as anyone else, but I know of this girl, she's grown up on the stage, she's really good."

"Let's just get going, okay?" Derek sighed, sliding his papers onto his desk.

Soon the girls were coming in one after the other, all between the ages of eighteen and twenty-five. Many came in full Victorian costume looking, in Derek's opinion, utterly ridiculous. Some were talented, others not so talented. Nevertheless, by lunch time, all four of them were exhausted.

Stretching, Derek began "Right guys shall we break-"

"Hey guys," Karen wandered into the audition room and Derek suddenly flashed back to five years ago when she'd walked through those doors. The way she'd shimmered then, like a new star just beginning to shine, had taken his breath away. Now, her brown eyes glittered and her auburn her bounced around her shoulders. She looked like an angel.

He barely noticed the young woman who walked in on her heels until Karen stepped aside and pushed her forward "I thought I'd bring Elizabeth in to see you, since I saw her waiting when I walked by."

"Why are you here for auditions anyway?" Derek didn't mean to sound so harsh, but his usual sarcastic tone felt like a slap to Karen.

Hotly, she answered "I thought I'd left my coat in the rehearsal room."

"The cleaning staff said they'd found one," Eileen nodded "I'll give them a call, it'll be here on Monday."

With a grateful smile, Karen said "Thank you."

"Well, we were just about to break for lunch, but since your protégé is already here," Derek sat back in his chair "When you're ready Miss Mason."

Taking her place in the centre of the room, sheet music in hand, she asked "What would you like me to read or sing first?"

"Sing please," Julia answered, when Derek didn't. The director couldn't shake the feeling that he'd seen her somewhere before. Something about those amber eyes was strikingly familiar. Maybe he'd seen her in a show or something, Karen had said she'd done a lot of work.

Elizabeth smiled and handed her sheet music to the pianist. In truth, she wasn't sure how good this song was for the part she was auditioning for, but it was one she loved. It was called _Just a Little Girl _and it was originally by Amy Studt, it was also her go-to audition song. She moved with the music instinctively, not even thinking about the subtle changes in her facial expression or the natural way she moved around the space. Since she'd first stepped out onto a stage, Elizabeth had been a brilliant actress, it just came naturally to her, like breathing.

Utterly mesmerised, Derek watched her intently. He admitted he had been sceptical about Karen's little favourite but, there was no doubt, this girl had something. More than that, she had all the depth and innocence needed for Anne. Glancing across at Karen, he realised that she really did know this show inside out and was worth listening to.

tttttt

Tom strolled down Broadway with Sam and Ivy. He'd put in his suggestions but he knew that Derek would have the final say on casting and all he could really do was wait for news. In truth, the wait was killing him. If only Derek would hurry up and make a decision so that he could give up all this wondering and speculating. Neither of his companions were exactly helping the situation.

"What about that girl Karen knows, how was she?" Sam asked, squeezing Tom's hand to bring him back to the present.

Blinking, he smiled "She was truly brilliant, even Eileen congratulated Karen on her recommendation."

"And Derek?" Sam probed, half-smiling goofily in that way that made Tom's heart just melt.

With a thoughtful sigh, he shrugged "I honestly don't know, he's been pretty quiet about it all."

"I could have stepped in as Anne," Ivy said, as though she hadn't really been listening for the rest of the conversation. Somehow, she had never really gotten over being rejected from Bombshell, she'd become a different person since that fateful preview. Though Tom and Sam would never have not been her friend, they had found her hard to deal with, especially since Karen had been hired onto _Brontë_. Tom attributed the change to a desperation and lack of hope that came from years of climbing up a hill and never moving.

Sympathy flashed through Sam's eyes "We know you could have, Ivy, but Derek wanted someone younger."

"That's another thing," Ivy frowned, turning to Tom "I think it's very insensitive of you to hire Derek even though he's my ex-boyfriend."

Sarcastically, he pointed out "If Derek wasn't hired on to any production where he'd slept with one of the actresses, he'd never get any work."

"I didn't just sleep with him," she protested "We had a relationship, still do."

In a tone that was something between fond and pitying, Sam said "Sleeping with your director and almost having him say that he loved you does not constitute a relationship, nor does the weird spying you do for him now."

"I do not spy for him," Ivy looked actually hurt by that comment.

Nevertheless, Tom still continued "You've been feeding him information since you got cast on this show."

"He was interested in my work, I was willing to tell him about it," she pursed her lips "Aren't I allowed to have conversations now?"

Sensing the beginnings of an argument, Sam broke the tension "Come on guys, let's not talk about work."

"Yeah, have you seen the new Les Mis commercial?" Tom took Sam's hint and changed the subject though his mind was still elsewhere. He'd learned long ago that it was a writer's curse to constantly have his head – and often heart – in the work and so he made no efforts to fight his drifting thoughts. Though he felt guilty for not entirely listening to his companions, still he wondered what Derek would decide.

kkkkkk

Karen hurried to the front door of the familiar apartment. She was practically buzzing. In fact she had to use all her acting skills to keep her expression neutral as she knocked on the front door.

It was Kate who opened the door. Elizabeth and Kate were very alike in appearance, with only a few minute differences. Where Elizabeth's hair was black, Kate's was blonde and Kate had a cute button nose where Elizabeth's was straight. Now though, the amber eyes that so matched her daughter's were clouded with worry "Karen?"

"Is Lizzie in?" Karen asked, waiting patiently to be asked in.

Nodding in a way that was sort of dazed, she moved aside "Come in, I'll find her." It occurred to Karen that it couldn't be that hard to find someone in a four room apartment but didn't say anything. She just shuffled in as Kate shut the door behind her.

Kate called for her and, in minutes, Elizabeth had rushed into the living room with Harry in toe. Seeing the look of nervous anticipation on Elizabeth's face was too much for Karen. A broad smile broke across her face and she practically squealed "Derek just gave me a call, you got the part!"

Much jumping around and screaming followed. Everyone was so busy celebrating that no-one noticed the colour draining from Kate's face.


	4. Welcome to the Family

**Author Note – This is the first chapter where I'm featuring a song, I thought I'd have to eventually.**

Quietly, Derek shuffled through his notes, planning what scenes he wanted to get through that day. There were plenty of scenes, they'd have to work hard to get through it all. The fact was that, Derek's decision to completely start over, though justified, seriously cut down on their rehearsal time. Not that they had any deadlines yet, exactly, but he could feel Eileen breathing down his neck. That was why he was there early this morning, so he could get going as quickly as possible.

First, in came Tom and Julia chatting as they went and paying no attention to Derek at all. They were quickly followed by a drove of dancers who practically cartwheeled in. Before long the cast and ensemble were pouring in, along with the crew. A few of the dancers were running a few steps in the corner while a couple of members of the cast had gathered round the piano for vocal warm-ups. Even without looking, Derek knew Karen was absent, it was like he could feel it in the air. Since the first thing he wanted to do involved her, he didn't push everyone else to get ready.

Then Karen walked in the door with Elizabeth by her side. Immediately, Derek moved over to steer the women forward "Right everybody meet the newest addition to our cast, Lizzie Mason. Where are my Brontës?"

In seconds four actors had gathered in the centre of the room, Karen included. Derek led Elizabeth over to them "Anne Brontë, meet the family, William plays your father, Patrick."

"Oh my God, you're William Harvey!" Elizabeth babbled before she could check herself. Her hand flew to her treacherous mouth as the company burst into laughter.

With a friendly smile, the old man chuckled "Yes I am and, though they all laugh now, they all did exactly the same thing their first day on this show."

"This is Debbie, she plays Charlotte," Derek gestured to the tall brunette who stood by Karen.

Awkwardly, Debbie just waved "Hi little sister."

"Branwell, the prodigal son is played by Bobby," the ex-dancer beamed at her without any words.

Then Derek finished with "And, of course you know Karen, who plays your sister and best friend, Emily." There were a few moments of hand-shaking and greetings before Derek announced "Let's get started with _Cod Liver Oil _that's scene fourteen of the first act, Anne and Charlotte begin on opposite sides of the stage with their respective families."

As the day progressed, Elizabeth felt strangely comfortable in the cast. Derek wasn't half as bad as Kate would have her believe he was going to be and all of the cast were so inviting. The piece was very much ensemble, centring around the three sisters and spiralling outwards with various smaller parts which all effected their lives in so many ways. Many of the actors played more than one part and those that didn't were usually in pretty crucial roles.

More than that though, now she was immersed in the show, seeing the way it was being set and performed, she could see this was truly brilliant. It certainly still needed work, but flashes of something extra-ordinary appeared in a verse or a speech. The strength of the material meant every member of the cast had wholly fell in love with it. She'd never been in a cast that was so dedicated and happy just to have one or two lines.

This was the project of a lifetime.

iiiiii

Sat in the window of her apartment, Ivy stared out at New York. This was the city where dreams happened. This was the city where her dreams had failed.

That was a terrible way to think. She was in a Broadway show, wasn't she? She had a decent part and the book and score were exceptional. Every day she went and had fun with some great people. When she was little, that's all she'd wanted, to live off the thing she loved. That's what she did. It's just somehow, in her head, she'd imagined something more glamorous, less depressing. Like the way her mum lived.

"Ivy, are you okay?" leaning in the doorway to the bathroom was Charlie. Dashing, golden boy Charlie who was much too young for her but kind and willing to listen. He was another small-part actor in the cast, taking the part of two of the Brontës' love interests. A few weeks ago, he'd found her crying and took her home and it grew from there. She didn't recall exactly how they started sleeping together.

Shaking her head, she breathed "I'm no good for you Charlie, you should go now, find a nice young girl who can start out her career with you, not trail after someone like me who's already lost any chance of really being a star."

"You can be a great actress without being a star," he pointed out, coming to stand by the window "You can be happy without being a star."

She turned and stared at him with wide blue eyes "Can I?"

"Of course you can," he beamed, a smile that lit up his whole face and made him shine "Plenty of people do and you still get to do the best job in the world."

Bitterly, she reached a hand up to his cheek "I used to be as innocent and hopeful as you, then I watched Karen Cartwright climb to the top of the Broadway ladder in two seconds when I'd spent years just trying to get a foot on the bottom wrung."

"That's a great metaphor," his smile faded somewhat. There was silence then, neither of them quite knowing what to say. So, slowly, Charlie leant in closer and pressed his lips to hers. For just a few seconds, everything else gave way and Ivy just forgot about everything she'd worried about.

Then it all came back as he pulled away and sighed "I better set off for rehearsals, I'll see you there, unless you want to share a car."

"No Charlie, people will talk if you turn up with me," Ivy shook her head "They can't find out about me and you, they'll rip you apart."

Charlie had had this argument too many times to waste his time disputing her point. With a sigh, he rushed out the door and, once again, left Ivy to her own thoughts.

eeeeee

"Right everyone, let's move straight on to Good Morning Mr Weighton," Derek ordered, twiddling his pen through his fingers as he spoke. So I want walk-bys from the chorus with Anne waiting at the gate for William to appear. Then Charlie, you will walk in as soon as the scene starts and, immediately, Lizzie will intercept you. Let's just improvise from there and we'll see how it goes."

Elizabeth was nervous, this was the first time she'd had to perform one of her big songs in front of the cast and she knew she'd have to prove herself. It had become clear to her that Leah had been really good in this part. She had a lot to live up to. Blood was roaring in her ears.

Glancing at Karen – who flashed her a bright, comforting smile – for support, she moved into position and waited out the introduction. Somehow though, as soon as she'd jumped out to intercept Charlie's progress across the stage, all those nerves went away. Bright and clear she began "_Well, good morning Mr Weighton,_

_How are you today?_"

As the song progressed they wound through a sort of dance. Her and Charlie played off each other, flirting slightly and smiling. That was, until they got to the bridge, then she stepped up to centre stage and sang sadly "_Good morning Mr Weighton,_

_Have you seen inside my heart?_

_Can you feel the pain I feel when we're apart?_

_Do you hear the words I whisper into my pillow?_

_Wherever I go, will you follow?_

_Good morning Mr Weighton,_

_Do you read the words I write?_

_Do you hear the songs I sing when you're in my sight?_

_Am I so foolish to hope you might sing them too?_

_Where I to die, would you cry for me?_

_Good morning Mr Weighton..._" The whole cast had stopped transfixed as she dropped to her knees, feeling the part more than thinking it. Something about the music just carried her this way and that as she performed.

Across the room, Karen was stood, awestruck, with Debbie. No-one could have predicted how well Elizabeth fit the part, it was the same reaction Karen had received when she did her first big solo. They all just stood around mesmerised by the realism before them. Even Derek who was, notoriously, difficult to please, sat wide-eyed as she finished the song "_Good Morning Mr Weighton,_

_My darling lovely one._"

Applause echoed throughout the room. Julia was sat, clasping Tom's hand, with tears trickling down her face while Eileen was smiling as she smelt a hit.

All too soon, the applause faded as Derek stood up and cleared his throat. He left a dramatic pause as they all watched him, in silence, curious of what the Dark Lord thought. Tension built around Elizabeth, waiting for some sort of criticism or scolding. Just as she began to think she wouldn't be able to bear waiting much longer, he told her "Very good, Lizzie, now let's get everyone else sorted out."

Graciously, Charlie bent to whisper in her ear "You're brilliant."

Elizabeth blushed but didn't notice the sad look Ivy cast her way.

kkkkkk

Wearily, the cast were gathering their things together at the end of rehearsal. It had been a long day of blocking, relentlessly, one scene after another. Now everyone was ready to drag themselves home for a warm bath and a nice long sleep.

So, understandably, everyone flinched when Derek called "Wait!" Once again, the director delighted in keeping his cast in suspense for a few moments until he announced "I want Karen to stay late to go through her songs."

Most of the cast breathed sighs of relief and hurried for the door. Charlie patted Karen on the back and chuckled, teasingly "Bad luck, Cartwright, see you tomorrow."

Dumping her bags back down, Karen walked into the centre of the room as everyone else left. Something about the situation made her slightly uneasy. Previous experience of what happened when she was left alone with Derek made her nervous. Admittedly he had apologized, but it wouldn't be the first time his actions had contradicted an apology. Even the pianist had left, when Derek assured him that they could work with a backing track for now. So here they were, Derek and Karen alone in the rehearsal studio.

"Karen, you look absolutely terrified," Derek commented, pulling up a couple of chairs for the two of them.

Shaking her worries from her mind, Karen sat down "No, I'm just tired, where do you want to start?"

"Could you sing through Poison Doctors?" he asked and turned over the pages of his script, lazily.

With a nod, she reached out to press play on the tiny portable CD player at their feet. Easily, she sang the song through, concentrating more on the notes and less on the acting. In a few lines, Derek had stopped her "More insane, Karen."

"More insane?" she frowned, amusement playing in her eyes.

Though he smiled at the way she lit up with restrained laughter, he elaborated "Yes, more insane, by the end of her life, Emily was losing it a little bit, I mean she refused medical help because she thought the doctors were trying to poison her. All her life, she'd lived in her own strange fantasy world, that escalated near her death."

"Ah, so you've done your research," she quipped, trying hard to keep the flirtatious edge from her tone. Nevertheless, the teasing nature of her retort didn't escape Derek's notice. His neck heated with a blush he hoped didn't show. Years of playing the dark director had made him more than capable of keeping his cool but something about this woman made his senses betray him. Here, with her so close to him, it would be easy to just let all those restraints go. Then again, he'd done that five years ago and all it had gotten him was a slap in the face.

Sitting back, he prompted "Run it again."

As she sung she did play it a lot more insane, as though the whole world was against her. However, she sung it all directly to Derek, holding his gaze steadily. There was a certain intensity in his dark gaze that just kept her there. Her heart was racing and she found it hard to breathe but she used it to make herself break up slightly, sounding less super-ultra-crazy and more ill. Eventually, she drew out the last note with a shuddering vibrato and silence filled the room.

Still the connection held between them. Air seared as breath mingled and eyes burnt tracks to their meeting place. For a moment, Karen thought he might make a move, sweet and genuine this time. All he had to do was lean forward.

Taking a deep calming breath, Derek glanced down at his script "Let's have a go at the second reprise of Can't You Just See It?"

And the moment was gone.


	5. Denial

**Author Note – Thank you for all the lovely comments, it's really nice to know that people are as interested in reading this story as I am in writing it.**

Derek slammed the door of his apartment, irritably, still seeing Karen's face imprinted on the back of his eyelids. It was stupid, he did not have feelings for some sparky actress who'd made it very clear that she wasn't interested. There were certain things Derek Wills did not do.

First he did not do shows that flopped, if he signed onto a show, he would make it a hit if it killed him. Not that he hadn't been involved in shows that hadn't done so well, but he had never had a show that had failed due to him. Lately, he'd been very picky about the projects he picked up, so he didn't become involved in dud shows.

Second, he did not do relationships. The women he dated, he usually liked and he understood that there had to be a few emotions involved. It was never just sex... well rarely. He didn't use women, he just let them believe what they wanted to believe without ever telling them that, whatever they had, was not permanent. Expecting to have a lifetime with someone just led to disappointment. It was one of society's many outrageous ideals. Human beings did not mate for life, his parents were a perfect example of that.

Last, he did not do love. He hadn't been in love since he was nineteen and didn't intend to stop abstaining now. No matter how much Karen effected him in ways he didn't want to think about, he was not falling for her. This was not love, he would not stand for it.

"Derek, you look like you've seen a ghost."

He jumped at the voice, banging into the door as he moved "Jesus, Eileen couldn't you have warned me that you'd be breaking into my apartment?"

"Where would be the fun in that?" she replied, leaning back on the sofa and throwing down the magazine she had been flicking through. In the dark, she almost looked like a cat waiting to pounce, Derek could practically see her tail wagging. It was quite unnerving.

Rubbing the back of his neck, he paced further into the apartment "If you want today's notes you better call Reagan, she's been noting them down for me."

"No, that's not what I wanted to talk to you about," Eileen stood up and he was suddenly aware of how tall a woman she was.

With a roll of his eyes, he snapped "Well, spit it out Eileen, I've got scenes to plan, you know?"

"When were you going to tell me that you were in love with Karen Cartwright?" she asked calmly, turning her dark eyes on him.

Immediately, he could feel himself heating up from the heart outwards. Why was it that Eileen always knew exactly what was going through his head? He sputtered out "I am absolutely not in love with-"

"Yeah and Scarlet O'hara wasn't in love with Rhett Butler," she responded sarcastically.

Clearing his throat, Derek calmed his battling emotions enough to conclusively say "Eileen, I can safely say I am not in love with anyone, let alone Karen Cartwright, I don't do love besides I'm too busy for anything like that at the moment. Satisfied?"

"Not really," she smirked, strolling past him to the door "But I suppose it'll have to do for now."

eeeeee

They were working on one of the hardest scenes in the show and Derek was already losing his nerve. The opening to act two, involved a whole load of cross-cutting, complex sets and an even more complex vocal score, asking a lot of the cast.

All at once, so much was going on and Elizabeth was finding it hard to keep up. Around her were the four kids who played the Robinson children, here for their Saturday rehearsal. Though poor Bobby, who played Branwell, was trying to help her keep up, he was failing and she stumbled just about every time they ran it. Between keeping the kids right and watching her own interests, it was killing her.

As she messed up the choreography again, Derek's voice tore across the room "Elizabeth is my direction not clear enough for you?"

Feeling her heart jump into her mouth, she began "No it's just-"

"Just what, that baby needs her mother to hold her hand?" he hissed, slamming his script down on the table "There is a seven-year-old next to you who is keeping up but you can't?"

Elizabeth made a feeble attempt to defend herself "They've been doing the material longer than I have."

"But the blocking's new to them too," Derek pushed her argument aside "And you haven't been on the production much less time than I have and I know it any which way. You can not use that as an excuse, you are simply not concentrating. Either that or you're not good enough-"

All at once, Karen's voice struck up an interruption "That's enough Derek."

"He'll tell her when it's enough," Ivy snapped, feeling the need to put in her opinion as she stood by Karen "Since when do you become the font of all knowledge?"

With a start, Charlie looked up from his place at the side of the room "Since when did you have the right to interrupt either, Ivy?"

"Stop it, all of you!" Derek bellowed "None of you need to add your own comments here."

Angrily, Ivy turned back to Derek, like she had at that rehearsal all those years ago "I could have played Anne, Derek! I told you that before you started directing this show and I can keep up with your direction."

"Ivy, stop," Charlie stood up "Lizzie's great in this."

Eyes welling with treacherous tears, Ivy spat "Oh, you think so, do you?"

Throwing his hand up to his face, Derek groaned "I live in a bloody soap opera!"

"Everybody stop!" Tom stood up "You're all just tired and stressed, okay? Now it's-" he checked his watch "-ten-to-five, I say we all call it a day and approach the scene afresh tomorrow, any objections." When silence ensued, the composer nodded "Good, have you got your stuff Sam?"

Grabbing his bag and throwing it over his shoulder, Sam nodded "Sure."

"Let's go," Tom offered his hand (which Sam took) and pulled him towards the door as the rest of the cast and creative team watched in stunned silence.

Once they were gone the cast began to gather their things as Derek glared at them all. Most of them avoided his gaze fearfully but he noticed Karen glare right back as she walked Elizabeth out of the door. Something told him he'd seriously messed up – not that he cared, of course.

kkkkkk

Kate had just breezed in from work, as a receptionist for a small stationary firm. Now she was rushing around the apartment, trying to get some sort of dinner together for when Elizabeth had got home. Ever since Elizabeth was born, Kate had got used to looking after them both, it was a fact of life when your parents chucked you out on your pregnant behind. That was how she saw it, anyway.

Then she heard the door slam and called, without looking up "I've put a pizza in the oven." When there was no reply, she turned her eyes towards the door.

There was Elizabeth, curled on the doormat with her coat and bag cast on either side of her. Her head was bowed into her hands as her black curls fell messily over her face, newly released from their ponytail binds. What shook Kate, however, was the way Elizabeth shook with rapt tears as her dishevelled form huddled under the doorknob.

"Sweetheart, what's wrong," Kate cried, setting down the cutlery she held in her hands.

Shaking her head, Elizabeth blurted, in an explosion of words "I can't do it, Mum, I'm not good enough. Derek asks so much and I just don't have the stamina, or ability, to keep up and then he shouts at me."

"He shouted at you?" she frowned, moving to sit in front of her daughter "Why?"

With pure frustration, Elizabeth practically screamed "Because I can't get it right! There's so much happening at the beginning of act two and I can't do the choreography or keep in time or..."

"Shh, shh, Lizzie, look at me," she cooed as she took her daughter's hands to comfort her. Identical amber eyes met as Kate continued "It's going to be fine, you're new to this production, of course you're a little behind. What we are going to do is sit and go over that scene tonight until you could do it upside down, balancing Derek bloody Wills on your foot, okay?"

She couldn't help but laugh at that, bringing her hand up to wipe a stray tear away "It's not his fault, you know, he's just trying to put a really complex show on."

"If you say so," Kate replied, only just keeping the ice from her tone as she helped her daughter up.

As the two of them took seats at the kitchen table to run lines while the pizza cooked, Kate decided that she would not sit by while some big-shot director could bully her daughter. This was not right and, no matter how much she was trying to be an adult, Elizabeth still needed her mother to look out for her.

jjjjjj

"If you ask me," Julia sighed, her head resting on Frank's shoulder "Derek's losing it a little." They were sat in their living room, waiting for Leo to arrive for dinner. The television was on low and the fire was on high. The two of them were very cosy in each other's arms. As far as they were concerned, the events of five years ago never happened, they were still the strong faithful couple that they'd always been.

Drowsily, Frank asked "Why do you say that?"

"He's just not as on the ball as he usually is," she shrugged "It's like something's distracting him."

With a yawn, he speculated "Maybe, it's a girl."

"Derek with a girl," she laughed, moving her red hair out of her face "Yeah, right."

Frowning in misunderstanding, Frank pointed out "He is a famous womaniser."

"Exactly, quote: 'womaniser'," she retorted "Derek doesn't do relationships and he doesn't get this distracted by a plain-old hook-up."

As a reply, he commented "You talk about him like he had no heart."

"That's because he doesn't have a heart," Julia stated with confidence "He'd probably go after me, if he didn't know I love you so much."

Desperate for a change in subject, he pulled away and leant towards the clock "How long does that boy expect us to wait?"

"He's in college, he doesn't get anywhere on time," she smiled, remembering what her and Tom had been like in their college years.

Just then, the phone rang. Frank picked it up lazily and answered "Hello, this is Frank." Julia tried to assess who was on the phone by her husband's facial expressions but ultimately failed. So it wasn't until he rung off that she got to know what the call was about "That was Leo."

"And?" Julia prompted.

With a sly smile, he continued "He's too bogged down with homework to come over tonight, so we'll have to entertain ourselves."

Catching her husband's low tone, Julia smiled "I'm sure we'll think of something to do." Then, slowly, she leant in to capture his lips with her's.

dddddd

It never failed to amaze Derek what people would say when they thought he wasn't listening. The best examples of this always came at the end of rehearsal, when everyone was beginning to filter out of the rehearsal space.

Across the room, Karen was getting her stuff together, lethargically, before she left. Tonight, she wasn't moving as fast as she usually did. He could only assume that this was because she was tired. It didn't occur to him that, by noticing this, he was admitting that he regularly watched her at the end of rehearsal.

With deliberate steps, Ivy strolled over to her "Hello Karen."

"Ivy, we've been in rehearsal together all day," she pointed out slowly, as though it might be hard for Ivy to understand.

Frowning at her tone, she hissed "I just wanted to tell you that he's not interested."

"Who's not interested?" Karen sighed laboriously, making a move towards the door.

Ivy stepped in Karen's way as she answered "Derek, of course, I know you think he falls for your whole baby bird act, but he doesn't and I think you should abandon your delusions about him right now."

"Has it ever occurred to you Ivy," she cocked her hip, irritably "That I'm not you."

Immediately taking offence, the blonde asked "What's that supposed to mean?"

"I mean, I don't fall for the first director that makes a pass at mean," Karen snapped before pacing past her and leaving her alone in the centre of the room.

A pain twisted in Derek's stomach as he realised that Karen had just completely rejected him. It seemed he really had lost his chance with her, but what did he care? He didn't do relationships and Karen wasn't the kind of girl you just slept with. Not so long ago he'd deluded himself into thinking that she might just be the girl who changed things, but that was before his advances were answered with a slap to the face. It was about time he admitted that he was not in love with Karen Cartwright.

The last of the cast walked out the door and Derek turned his thoughts to gathering his rough notes together. In fact he let himself become so engrossed with the task that he didn't notice the woman enter the room, despite the ominous click of her heels.

"Derek?"

He glanced up and could hardly believe his own eyes. There stood a woman that he hadn't seen since he was nineteen years old but she hadn't changed. Same blonde hair, same hypnotising amber eyes. Even the way she stood, with her weight on one leg, was exactly the same as it had always been.

"Kate."

Avoiding his gaze, she sighed "I'm here about my daughter."


	6. The Prodigal Ex

**Author Note – Sorry it has taken so long for me to update, I've been so busy for the last few days.**

Derek stared at the woman before him. Memories flashed before his eyes. Days back in England when he'd been staying with his mother's family in Devon after he'd got out of education. She'd been a girl from the village that he'd taken to as soon as he met her. They had shared interests, read each other prose and poetry, talked about their favourite shows, sang and danced under the stars and fallen utterly and completely in love. He couldn't think of a more romantic and innocent time in his life.

"Your daughter?" he asked, unable to quite comprehend that she was here in front of him.

Rubbing her head, wearily, Kate sighed "Don't stare at me like that Derek, you look like a deer in the headlights."

"I'm sorry," he glanced away, just for a second, to set his notes back down on the desk "I just can't quite believe you're here."

She turned towards the window "You know, you never were good at getting to know your colleagues."

"Darlin' you're going to have to stop talking in riddles," Derek folded his arms.

Angry at his use of an endearment, she spun round "My daughter came home crying last night because she thought she wasn't good enough. She lives on that stage and I know that she was born to be a star, it's written all over her. Yes she's been struggling with your choreography, that does not mean you get to massacre her!"

"Who in God's name is your daughter?" he shot back, looking almost outraged at her audacity. Though, he had nothing to be surprised about, she'd always given him as good as she got.

With a roll of her eyes, Kate replied "Elizabeth Mason."

"But your surname's Jones," he responded, too baffled to truly think about the words that poured from his mouth.

Folding her arms, she shook her head "Children rarely take their mother's name."

"So Mason was her father's name?" he probed, trying to find out something about what she'd been doing with her life for the years they'd spent apart. Unfortunately for him, it was then that they were interrupted, by none other than the girl in question.

Elizabeth looked quite stunned to see her mother talking to her director, as she stood in the doorway with a teenage boy behind her. It was only then that Derek spotted the young actress's bag still left by the piano. Frowning, she shook her head slightly "Erm, am I interrupting something."

Quickly, Kate denied the immediate assumption her daughter made "No, sweetheart, I just-"

"Kate's an old friend," Derek explained for her, thinking he was being helpful but only earning him a glare from Kate.

With a quirk of her eyebrows, Elizabeth said "Oh really?"

"Yep," Kate replied quickly "Now let's go." In moments the woman had swept both of the teenagers from the room and taken Elizabeth's dance bag with her as well. Suddenly, Derek was once again alone and completely confused.

Too many thoughts were all whirring round his head at once, just like when he'd lost Kate the first time. So he distracted himself the only way he knew how, he went back to his notes and ran over the blocking for the hardest scenes. Maybe he'd just work through the night.

tttttt

Tom walked to Eileen's office with Julia, cradling the folder under his arm as the cars rushed past. Quietly, Julia was sipping her coffee as her eyes scanned the road absently. To break the comfortable silence that had held between them since they turned the last corner, Tom ventured "Ivy said some woman came to see Derek last night."

"There's always some woman coming to see Derek," Julia pointed out, finally turning her attention back to him.

With a smirk, he added "But this was an old friend and, according to Ivy, Elizabeth's mother."

"Tom, you really need to stop listening to all this gossip," she sighed as they paced through the doors into the building.

A hand on his hip, he protested "Don't tell me you're not the least bit interested."

She didn't answer that, just dropped her empty coffee cup into the bin and moved to greet Eileen who was approaching to meet them. With a smile, the producer embraced them but there was something about her smile that unnerved both writers. It was the same smile she flashed them when she was about to try a new approach or fire a director or bring in a new composer or hijack a show on the merits of nothing but a leaked demo on Youtube.

"Is Derek already here?" asked Tom, as they followed her to the lift.

Nodding, she replied "He arrived just a few minutes ago, is it just me or has he been distracted lately?"

"I know, right?" Julia exclaimed, earning her a sceptical side-glance from Tom.

Smugly, he whispered to his writing partner "Who's gossiping now?"

As they stepped into the office, Derek stood up to lean in the doorway and smirk at them "And now the whole motley crew is here."

"Nice to see you too, Derek," Tom quipped, pacing past him into the office. Used to the two of them bickering, the two women looked at each other wearily before following them in.

Soon all of them were settled, Eileen sat behind her desk with her sharp eyes focussed on the three of them. Derek chose to stand by the settee where both of the writers had sat. All three, Derek, Tom and Julia, had the strangest feeling of suspense and anticipation at the calculating way the producer was looking over them.

"Please put us out of our misery, Eileen," Derek sighed irritably "Tom may die of suspense."

Turning to scowl at him, Tom asked "When did you get the right to speak for me?"

"Tom, please, don't pretend you don't want to find out," Julia interrupted before they could argue any more.

Quietly, Eileen took command of the room, simply by sitting up a little straighter and beginning to speak "I just wanted to run this by you before I start calling up the investors. We're going to do a workshop in two months."

"T-t-two months!" Derek stuttered, stumbling forward from his casual lean against the wall "I need three times that time, this is a complex show and I'm reworking everything. Not to mention the fact that we have kids on set and-"

With ice in his tone, Tom pointed out "And you're not at you're best." Silence overtook the room as Julia smacked his arm as a warning. Nevertheless, Tom didn't even look her way, just carried on "You're distracted Derek, and that's not going to help things, you need to get your head in the game."

"And you need to get your head out of the high school musical songs and understand that I've been thrown in at the deep end here," he retorted, angrily, matching his sparring partner.

Quickly, Tom returned "But you're supposed to be one of the best directors on Broadway, yet you can't seem to focus, are you really that much out of your depth?"

"Stop, both of you!" Eileen shouted, standing up "We need investors, okay, so in two months we put on a workshop or I have to shut this show down for simple lack of funds, understood?"

Raising an eyebrow, Derek spat "So all you really called us in for was to give us our marching orders?"

"You can look at it any way you want, Derek, I'm just doing what I think is best for the show," she replied, staring at him levelly, in that way which made you realise that she knew what she was doing. With a nod, he took a step back. He should know by now that this was how show business worked.

kkkkkk

Karen's small kitchen was crowded by the three of them. Sat on the counter, Elizabeth was sipping tea while her boyfriend, Harry, stood by her side with his fingers dancing, innocently, up and down her leg. Her script in front of her, Karen was sat at the kitchen table, scanning over the edits to the script while painting her nails. The two teenagers had stopped at Karen's when they'd been wandering around New York, as they often did when they were passing through the neighbourhood.

"Karen," Elizabeth started, reaching up to play with the ends of Harry's hair "You know Derek pretty well, don't you?"

Raising her eyebrows, Karen replied "I don't think anyone knows Derek well."

"But if you asked him something, he'd tell you," she probed again as Harry took her hand empathetically.

With a frown, the older actress shrugged "I suppose it would depend what I asked him, why?"

"I want to know how he knows my mum," Elizabeth hopped down from the surface to take a seat opposite Karen at the table.

It was Harry, however, who explained "We walked into the rehearsal the other day and found the two of them in rapt conversation."

"We think there's some history but I can't get anything out of my mum and I don't know Derek well enough to ask him so I was wondering if you'd get me an in?" she asked, her eyes bright with hope.

Awkwardly, Karen shook her head "I think you're seriously over-estimating how well I know Derek, we've rarely spoken out of work, I can't just-"

"Please Karen."

"Fine."

dddddd

To say that Derek was stressed was an understatement. He thought that he may start going bald because his head would forget to grow hair because it had too much to do.

Everyone was being roped in for extra rehearsals so he had any hope of getting everything together, which included having the kids in every evening after school. He was actually sleeping in the rehearsal space so he could work every spare moment and was having Reagan, his stage manager, bring in his breakfast for him, as well as changes of clothes. Anyone who knew him was telling him that living that way wasn't good for him, even Tom showed concern, but it wasn't just that the show needed it.

The fact was that he hadn't wanted to go home since Kate had turned up, the urge would be too great to open the box at the back of his wardrobe, the one full of old photos. It would just be too tempting to find his old wallet with the eight pictures of her and him. He could not go back and relive those memories. There was no way in hell he was unravelling all those years of work. There was no way in hell he was going to remember that he had been in love before. There was no way in hell he was going to remember how much it hurt to break your own heart.

Damn it, why did she have to turn up again now?

Did she live to mess with his career?

"Debbie, do I even need to tell you that you shouldn't look at the other girls when they're singing, you are not aware that the other two are there, you are in different rooms," Derek groaned "Besides you're supposed to wrapped up in being creative right now."

With a tired sigh, Debbie replied "It's only rehearsal Derek."

"Only rehearsal?" he sputtered, standing up with a vengeance "Everybody, tell me how long we have until we go in front of an audience."

Eyeing each other incredulously, the whole company chimed "Two months."

"Six weeks now, actually," he hissed "So unless you want to look like idiots out there, I'd start taking this a little more seriously than just rehearsals. Take five, we'll come back to this scene in a moment."

He sat back down, suddenly realising how tired he was. Everything was irritating him. It was just getting too much but he'd soldier on. This was his life and he'd gone over these scenes so many times he dreamt about the blocking. Quite literally, he could do this in his sleep. Unfortunately, he'd gotten so used to sleeping in the oddest places lately, that he just shut his eyes and fell asleep on the spot without even noticing his eyes drifting shut.

"Er, Derek."

A voice broke into Derek's dreams, angelic and ringing in his ears like the bells of heaven. It was only as his eyes fluttered open that he even realised he'd been asleep. A blurred image of Karen smiled sympathetically at him.

"What happened?" he mumbled, sitting up straight and rubbing his eyes like a child.

Tucking a curl behind her ear, she said "You fell asleep, Eileen said you haven't been sleeping."

"I've been sleeping," he yawned and stretched slightly. His body ached all over from sleeping in such an awkward position.

With a shake of her head, Karen gestured back over her shoulder "Crashing on the sofa over there doesn't count, you look exhausted, you should go home and get some real rest."

"No we should get back to work," he sat up straight only to glance round at an empty room "Where did everyone go?"

Her face lit up as she laughed quietly "They're all just as tired as you are, and they've been working so incredibly hard these last few days, Eileen gave them the afternoon off."

Immediately, Derek stood up in anger "But we need to set-"

"No we don't," she cocked her head to one side "The show will come together, even if you do give your cast one afternoon of rest." What was it about her that looked so glorious today? Something about the way the light brought out the red in her hair and the angle of her head made her stare up through her lashes made her look like the more beautiful kind of fallen angel. Though what she could have done to be exiled from heaven, he couldn't fathom. No one that good could have ever sinned.

Seeing the baffled look on his face, Karen rolled her eyes, stood up and began to make her way, slowly, towards the door "Come on, Mr Director, I'm going to make sure you get home and get some proper rest."

"I don't need walking home, you know?"

"Please, you fell asleep in the middle of a rehearsal and I'm supposed to trust you not to fall asleep on the cab ride home besides, I actually want to make sure you go home and don't just take a car round the block and then come straight back here again."

It was unreal how well she understood the way his mind worked.

"Who did you offend to get stuck with escorting me home?" he asked, getting up to follow her. She just chuckled. There wasn't much opportunity for conversation until they got back to Derek's apartment, mostly because neither really wanted to have any sort of serious conversation in front of the taxi driver.

Finally, when they walked through the door, Derek broke their unmentioned silence "When was the last time you were in my apartment?"

Out of the corner of her eye, Karen watched him with a smirk and sang "_Happy birthday, to you, happy birthday, to you..._" It astounded Derek that she could still do the Marilyn vibrato as though she'd left the part only yesterday rather than five years ago. Equally, he couldn't believe that by merely singing it, Karen could make his throat dry up and his face heat uncomfortably.

"Of course, how could I forget?" he choked out, scurrying unceremoniously through to the kitchen for a glass of water.

Following him through, she began "You know there's this gossip around the cast."

"Isn't there always," he chuckled, only just resisting the urge to pour the ice cold water down his shirt to cool off and wake up.

Quietly, she pursed her lips and twirled a lock of hair through her fingers "Why were you talking to Kate the other night?"

"You know K-k-kate?" Derek stammered out, stumbling back on the counter.

With a nod, she explained "I met her when Lizzie and I worked together on Les Mis."

Even though, if he'd thought about it, it was pretty obvious that Karen would know Kate, Derek's head was spinning. Images of both women flashed through his head alternately, mixing and merging until all he knew was his heart was twisted every which way.

After a moment of watching about a million emotions flash across Derek's, usually unreadable, face, Karen asked "What is she to you, Derek?"

It happened before he could think about it, he was stumbling up the stairs with Karen following nervously on his heels. He clambered through into his room and threw open the door of his wardrobe. Then, after a moment of pushing aside clothes, he pulled out the box of photos that he hid at the back of his closet.

The feverish way in which he searched made Karen nervous. It was like he was a man crazed.

For a few minutes, he sifted through the photos until he found an old battered wallet which he tossed to her, carelessly. She caught it and pried it open, finding a string of photos fell out of it. like a chain from the cover. Each one showed two people Karen knew well, both younger than she had ever seen them.

Derek hugging Kate, both smiling at the camera, honestly, none of Derek's usual snide smirk there.

Derek and Kate kissing with Derek's arm extended out of frame as though he was holding the camera in front of them to take the picture.

Derek and Kate side-by-side, obviously at some king of party or something, looking sideways at each other, even as they grinned at the camera.

Derek and Kate sat on a picnic blanket, his head thrown back laughing at something she'd said.

The next three were all of just Kate, obviously posing for photos with Derek behind the camera. Karen could tell by the way she looked past the lens at the person behind it and the innocent love-struck smile in each one.

Lastly, there was one of Derek and Kate, both with their hair mussed up and their eyes bleary. Derek is holding the camera above them as they lay side by side with their heads pressed together on the pillow and the covers twisted up around them. There was something in that photo that Karen had been sure she would never see in Derek. In his eyes and smile, was an innocent, youthful, gorgeous look that was so full of heart.

Derek Wills had a heart.

"She's the one that got away."

Glancing up at him, as he spoke, Karen asked "What happened?"

"My career, she was a country girl at heart," he rubbed his forehead, wearily "I wanted to be in the city, working, perusing my dream. A job came up in New York and I took it, she wasn't going to follow me there."

Slowly, cautiously, she fell to her knees in front of him "Did you love her?"

"Yes," he breathed, meeting those eyes that could take everything away from him. He realised, on seeing her brown eyes wide with sympathy, that he'd given too much of himself up to her tonight "And I've never loved any other woman since." That was a lie and he didn't even realise it was until he said it.

He had loved since then. For the past five years he'd been madly in love and it had taken him this long to realise it. He was in love with Karen Cartwright.


	7. Frantic

**Author Note – Thank you so much for all the amazing reviews, they really got me working on this chapter. Keep them coming and I hope you like this chapter.**

With a sigh of relief, Karen stepped through the front door of her apartment and pulled her shoes off her aching feet. Now that they were only a week from the workshop, Derek had taken his ridiculous rehearsal schedule to a new extreme. They now had no lunch break, you ate when you weren't in the scene that was being rehearsed. To add to this, you had to be constantly paying attention so you could be precisely where Derek wanted you when he wanted it, otherwise you were set to face the wrath of the director. It didn't really help matters that Tom and Julia were constantly making changes to the book and score so they were constantly having to run things again. Even now that she was home, Karen was aware that Derek could, if he felt so inclined, call her up for extra rehearsal. It was unnerving.

As well as this she was beginning to feel unsure of herself in the role, a problem she'd never had with this character before. Emily was so hard to play because there were few reports of what she was like yet she's one of the most famous authors of all time. Biographies on her were usually vague and Karen was truly having trouble figuring out how to play her under Derek's direction.

Derek seemed himself again. Karen was sure it had helped him, letting everything out about Kate. Men like that just hold everything in.

Despite the fact that Elizabeth had asked her numerous times for information, Karen had decided to keep what she'd discovered to herself. It wasn't right for her to betray Derek's confidence, even if he'd not asked her to keep it a secret. She guessed he hadn't opened up to many people in his life and she wanted to encourage him to trust her. Besides, what teenage girl really wanted to know about their mother's sex-life?

It was strange to her that Derek had been in love once. Not just any love either, one of those special loves that stayed with you your whole life. That meant something to Karen. It meant he hadn't lied that day he'd told her that he did understand love. More than that though, it meant there was a possibility he could feel something for her too which made her heart squeeze with hope.

Maybe there was something in Derek that was willing to truly give himself up to another human being. If she could find that something, perhaps she could let herself fall in love with him. Perhaps she could let him fall in love with her too.

dddddd

"Kids, you need to look more scared," Derek ordered as they ran the school number 'Fire and Brimstone'. It was a number where Derek had to co-ordinate numerous children and ensemble in an extremely atmospheric song. Thanks to Tom's wonderful (if irritatingly complex) orchestrations they also had to co-ordinate various choral-style harmonies.

Swallowing her latest mouthful of pasta, Elizabeth whispered to Charlie "They are scared, just not of the teachers."

"Maybe we should just put Derek in the wings every night," he replied, with a sly smile "Scare the kids to death, they'll be brilliant."

They both giggled at that and Ivy, who was sat a few seats away, glared daggers at them. As much as this was what she'd thought she'd wanted, Ivy was struggling with how well Charlie and Elizabeth got on and everyone could see how she was practically drowning in all the emotion. Anyone who knew the blonde actress would tell you that her weakness was that she gave too much of herself to everything she did.

Derek knew that better than everyone. Despite his best efforts, he hadn't been able to shake her in the years since Bombshell and he didn't mind so much. Aside from being a great booty call, she also had an uncanny ability to brighten up his day.

So maybe he felt indebted to her in some way. Which was why he decided to call out the offending party "Would you like to share the joke?"

Charlie and Elizabeth glanced up from the – now deep – conversation they were engaged in. Awkwardly, Charlie rubbed the back of his neck and mumbled an apology. Narrowing her eyes, however, Elizabeth stood up "We were just joking about the fact that they'd only look scared if you were stood in the wings because you intimidate them too much to act properly."

"If I intimidate them, Miss Mason, then they need to grow some bloody balls and put up with it!" he retorted quickly, eyes flashing with the thrill of the fight. God, she was just like her mother.

With a shake of her head, she said bitterly "I've known directors like you, Derek Wills, directors that think the secret to directing kids is to make them scared to put a foot wrong. Well that just gets you unhappy kids. You need to actually realise that they're human beings who deserve the same amount of respect as any other performer."

"You feel very passionately about this, don't you?" he spat back.

Suddenly seeming to realise that the whole company was watching her, wide eyed, Elizabeth shifted her weight to her back foot and swallowed "Yes, well..."

"Fine," Derek turned his attention back to the children, crouched down to their level and ushered them in a circle around them. Though slightly baffled, they all huddled in, the oldest girl grabbing the hand of Fallon, who played her younger brother. With a friendly (sort-of fatherly) smile, he told them "From now on in, I want you to come to me if any of you have any problems with my notes or anything else I may do and I'll try to help wherever I can, okay?"

All the children nodded in a subdued sort of way. As soon as he knew they'd all got it, he stood back up and called "Right, we'll leave that for now, can we run scene nine, in the second act?"

eeeeee

"Well Derek," Eileen sighed, quirking an eyebrow at him "How do you think rehearsals are going?"

He turned to her as the light streamed in behind him and made him a silhouette against the backdrop of her office window "I think Ivy's doing brilliantly."

"You're not sleeping with her again are you?" Tom asked accusingly, as he flipped through the script with Julia.

In a voice dripping with sarcasm, he replied "Yes, Tom, I'm sleeping with her again because I have so much time to spare to deal with the mood swings and the emotional commitment and the endless whining! Besides which, she clearly has a thing for Charlie and you would be the first to know if she scored with me, unless of course, you're not the bosom buddies you were the last time I checked. And, as hard as it may be for you to understand, I can actually appreciate an actress's talent without having gone to bed with her."

"I agree," Julia turned over the page "I mean, about Ivy doing so well, she's really got this show set, it's good for the rest of the cast."

Running his fingers through his hair, Tom sniffed "I never said she wasn't good, because she's actually carrying half the cast at the moment, it was a mere question of Derek's taste."

"Do you ever stop?" the director groaned.

With a sly glance in the other man's direction, Tom simply ignored his sparring partner "Most of the cast feel too nervous and pressured to do much but hit their marks, at the moment."

"Even Karen's slipping," Julia nodded "I was talking to her the other day and she'd really worried about the way she's playing Emily, she feels like she's not getting it as much as she used to."

At the mere sound of Karen's name, Derek found his mind buzzing. What did she have to be worried about, she was amazing in this show? It was probably just that the workshop was coming up and she was feeling the pressure. Then again, it wasn't like Karen hadn't been under pressure before. She knew how to deal with expectations, she wasn't the same naive actress she was when she played Marilyn. Karen did not buckle under pressure. So maybe she needed a bit of a pep talk.

hhhhhh

It had been weeks since Harry had had any serious alone time with his girlfriend. Between the show and his own school commitments, they had very little time when they could meet up. It was beginning to get to him more than he was willing to admit.

Nevertheless, he would put up with all of it for the look on her face at that moment. Just the quiet way she was smiling as she sat there on her bed, next to him. Whenever she was working on a show, she just glowed with the pleasure of it. There was never a time when she looked more radiant than when she was involved in a show she loved. It lifted his heart to see her so happy and made him want to just reach for her. He only wished that he could make her that happy.

"You're beautiful," he breathed, as she looked up from the rewrites she was going through.

Smiling at that, Elizabeth shook her dark curls "You sure do know how to charm a girl."

"Only you," he shrugged "No other girls really take me seriously."

With a teasing quirk of her eyebrow, she chuckled "Yes they do, every girl I've ever talked to finds you charming, it's just most of them can do nothing but giggle like idiots whenever you get anywhere near them."

"Exactly!" he waved his arms at her in a sort of 'there you go' gesture "They laugh at me."

Slowly, she moved closer to him and laid a hand on his chest "They laugh because they don't know how to talk to a guy as perfect as you."

"What part of me says perfect to you?" Harry shook his head, his breath hitching a little as she leant closer.

As she replied, she leant closer still so her breath tickled his lips "All of you." With that, she closed the gap between them, pressing her lips heavily to his. Gently, but forcefully, she pushed him back onto the bed, her hair falling like a curtain round them both. He moved his hands to her waist, his thumbs moving in circles against her clothes.

After a few moments of the slow meeting and parting of mouths, she pulled away, placing a finger on his lips to stop him chasing her "No further tonight, I don't have the energy with rehearsals the way they are at the moment."

"Yeah, of course," he blinked, reaching up to brush her hair behind her ear "Whatever you want, okay? Besides, it's a school night, I think Mum wants me home early."

She beamed down at him and planted one last, chaste, kiss on his lips before sitting back up "Thank you." As he readjusted his position, she reached for the script on her bedside table "Will you read through the rewrites with me, I just want to check I've got them."

Taking the folder from her, he nodded but frowned. There was something odd in her expression, something strangely sad. He flicked through to the first page she'd marked with a yellow post-it-note (he knew her system for learning rewrites) but asked "What's bothering you, Lizzie?"

"Nothing," she lied.

With a roll of his eyes, he reached across for her hand "You know you can't lie to me." They held each other's gaze for a few moments, Harry quietly staring her out.

It didn't take long for her to cave "It's just, Mum's been trying to convince me to drop out of the show."

"What? Why?" he stuttered, eyes wide.

Elizabeth shrugged, twisting the end of her hair through her fingers "Me and Derek haven't been seeing eye to eye in rehearsal and she doesn't trust him."

"Do you?" he cocked his head to one side "Trust him, I mean?"

Irritably, she half-laughed "Of course not, but I know I can look after myself, I'm not going to let him get the better of me. Besides, I have friends in that cast to look after me. Trusting Derek is not an issue."

"If he ever hurt you," Harry climbed to his knees, worried eyes focussed on hers.

A smile gracing her face, she reached up to touch his cheek "You'd ride in your white horse and challenge him to a duel for my honour." She giggled and leant her forehead against his "The fact you'd do that for me, is why I love you so much but he couldn't hurt me, I'll just try not to hurt him."

"Jesus, I love you," he laughed, tilting his head to kiss her once more.

kkkkkk

Yawning, Karen stood scanning the DVDs on the shelf above her television. So she had nothing to do tonight and was kind of feeling down. She was so desperate right now that she was beginning to hope that some gorgeous guy would just break down her door and carry her away. Even if that was a little fanciful, a girl could dream, right?

_Knock. Knock._

Okay, that's weird, no-one usually came round her apartment at this time of night. What if it was some rapist murderer come to kill her in her own apartment? This was New York after all, this city was full of criminals.

Quickly, she grabbed the nearest think that could be used as a weapon and scurried for the door. She flung it open, raising the object above her head and only just stopping when she saw the stunned look on Derek's face. Trying to hide her embarrassed relief behind awkwardness, Karen lowered her weapon.

"You know, the thing that really stuns me," Derek raised an eyebrow at her "Isn't that you come to the door in hot pants and a tank top, looking like you want to kill me, it's the fact that you're trying to kill me with your Brontë script." He was stood with his weight on his right leg and his large dance bag over his shoulder.

Karen could feel her face flushing bright red "Sorry, I just, I had this thought that there was going to be some psychopath at the door who was going to... I don't know."

"It's okay, I'll forgive you," he shrugged, wandering past her into the apartment with a subtle wink.

Closing the door behind him, she asked curtly "Can I help you Derek?"

"Well," he turned back to her and suddenly all his usual arrogance was gone. All across his face was empathetic concern that made her stomach turn in the best way possible. It was strange because it wasn't like the time he'd come to her apartment to apologize, this time he looked almost comfortable. As well as that there was something in his eyes that hadn't been there before, something she couldn't quite recognise "Julia told me you'd been worried about the show."

With a shake of her head, she shrugged "I don't know..."

"Yes you do, you're getting exactly the same jitters you had playing Marilyn," he told her "Only you're having them later this time, do you remember what I told you then?"

Bashfully, Karen led the way into her living room to avoid looking him in the eye as she parroted "You told me that I had a lot of what is Marilyn essentially in me, so I shouldn't do her, I should be her."

"Exactly," he took her hand and turned her round to face him "And the same principle applies now. Emily Brontë was passionate, romantic and, I'm sure, would have been the first to answer the door wielding a book as a weapon."

She chuckled at that noticing, with a start, that electricity pulsed up her arm at his touch "Thanks Derek."

"Now, unless you have plans tonight," he let go of her hand to reach into his bag and pull out two DVDs "The two films that I feel sum up how Emily Brontë should be played, Devotion and Rent."

Shaking her head, Karen questioned "Devotion I can understand, it is a Brontë biography but why Rent?"

"If you can play Emily with a little bit of Mimi, I think you will be absolutely stunning," he replied simply, as if it was obvious. She thought about it for a moment, as much as she'd seen both films before, the idea of watching them with Derek was more than enchanting. Equally, being so close to Derek was frightening, it would be so easy for him to make a move. Really, it was a question of how much she trusted him.

As she grabbed the remote, she sighed "Fine, put in Rent."

The film happened to be one of Karen's favourite's but she found herself distracted. Beside her, Derek looked so relaxed and so... domestic. How many people had seen the dark lord of theatre leant back laughing at a movie. It was almost as if he was laid bare in front of her and she just couldn't look away.

When she caught him singing along both of them lost interest in the movie to become engrossed in conversation. They talked about their favourite musicals and Derek revealed that, before he turned to directing, he had wanted to be a dancer but was failed by his singing skills. After some coaxing, Karen told him that she had learnt to sing on Doris Day songs and still wanted to burst into song every time she heard Secret Love. Then there was their 'musical battle' when they saw who could name the most musicals. Eventually, sometime after Angel's funeral, both of them fell asleep on the sofa as the music played softly in the background.


	8. Fingers Crossed

**Author Note – I hope everyone had a nice Christmas and has a happy new year. I decided I should show my musical theatre nerdness in this chapter, I apologize, I may have been high on sugar when I wrote the first part of this chapter. Anyway, I'm rambling, here's the workshop chapter, fingers crossed!**

As Elizabeth wandered into the make-shift back stage for the workshop, Charlie rushed up to her. There was something odd in his expression as he quickly grabbed her hand and grinned "Feeling nervous?" Most of the cast were gathered around already, greeting each other with nervous grimaces and bright assurances. Like they all had some sort of psychic link, all of them were gathered around the piano in the corner, set up for warm-ups.

"Just a little bit," she replied as he pulled her into the crowd of performers who all grinned mischievously as she joined them "What's going on?"

From his place at the piano, Tom told her "We've had a couple of workshops like this so far, before every one we sing a little song to eliminate our nerves."

"Do you know the Cat and the Moon?" Sam asked, gently massaging Tom's shoulders "From the Lord of the Rings?"

With a half-nod, Elizabeth said "I think so, Mum loves that musical."

"In that case," Charlie shoved the sheet music into her hand "Will you start us off?"

Blinking, she heard the introduction chord strike out and didn't have time to protest before she sung "_There's an inn of old renown_

_Where they brew a beer so brown_."

"_Moon came rolling down the hill_," the oldest of the children, Dakota, joined Elizabeth at a nod from Charlie "_One Hevnsday night to drink his fill._" Then she put a silencing finger on her lips to show that this was when they stopped singing.

Right on cue, Charlie and Bobby rushed forward, dancing round the two girls as they sung "_On a three-stringed fiddle there_

_Played the Ostler's cat so fair._"

"_The hornèd Cow that night was seen,_" Elizabeth followed the lead Dakota took with slight choreography "_To dance a jig upon the green._"

After this came an exchange of dance and song that saw Dakota and Elizabeth face Charlie and Bobby in a sort of dance battle. Then, when the boys back-flipped as the girls sung "_World went reeling_", two more boys joined them and they formed a circle. The boys led the first part of the chorus, while two more girls joined Dakota and Elizabeth. Before long the girls had ducked under the joined arms of the boys to come up level to the boys as they sung the second half of the chorus.

Elizabeth found herself opposite Charlie as they broke off into couples. There was something strangely electric about his hand on her waste while he held her free hand tight. He led her in a pattern around the other three couples as other members of the cast came forward to sing a line or two. Something in his gaze which she held awoke the butterflies in Elizabeth's stomach to dance around her insides in the most divine way.

"_Because we all want to dance like that,_" everyone sung as two more couples joined the throng.

Carefully, Charlie steered her into position and breathed in a tone only she could hear "Trust me."

Tom and Sam were now leading the singing as more and more couples joined the dancing "_Gambol and totter till you're_

_Hotter than a hatter and you_

_Spin all akimbo_

_Like a -_" Charlie lifted her by her waist and she kicked her legs out while leaning forward, she spun round him before he placed her back on the ground "_- windmill flailing._"

Though mildly disorientated she managed to get her bearings enough to join in with the verse and step back at the right time. They'd formed a corridor for couples to dance down and the first was Ivy and Bobby as they reached the chorus, all singing "_Downsides go up- hey!_

_Outsides go wide._

_You can clatter_

_With your platter_

_But the Moon slept till Sterrenday._" Charlie stepped forward and took her hands as they went galloping down the tunnel, splitting off and back into line just before they led off in two circles, one of girls and one of boys.

Then the boys and girls faced each other, parroting one-another's nonsense words in a sort of chanting tongue-twister battle. It occurred to Elizabeth that this really was an excellent warm-up song. Not only did it get you physically and vocally ready to perform, it also gave you a strange happy feeling inside that smoothed over all nerves.

Eventually, the two groups stepped together and found themselves nose to nose with their partners. Being nose-to-nose to Charlie made her feel things that she didn't necessarily want to admit. Nevertheless she focussed on the gradually speeding crescendo of "_Hotta-cotta-hotta-cotta-hotta-cotta-hotta-cotta-hotta-cotta-hotta-cotta-mi-fo-fo!_"

Charlie pulled her close in one swift movement, as they all broke off into couples once more, singing "_Downsides go up- hey!_

_Outsides go wide._

_With a twiddle on the fiddle_

_In the middle by the griddle_

_And the Moon slept till Sterrenday._

_Upsides go west- hey!_

_Broadsides go boom._

_With a batter and a clatter_

_You can shatter every platter_

_But the Moon slept till Sterrenday._" They all broke off singing and laughed, couples breaking off while everyone smiled. Elizabeth could see that everyone looked so much happier now that they'd sung that, it was nice to see.

Suddenly though, the laughter and chatter stopped as everyone turned to see Derek and Karen walk in side-by-side. Everyone eyed each other meaningfully. Derek was, after all, well known for sleeping with his leads, no-one was surprised at him arriving with an actress. What surprised people was that it was Karen stood sheepishly at his side and not one of the more promiscuous girls.

Ignoring their stares, Derek threw his bag and coat to one of the runners and stated in that commanding tone he used for directing "I see you're all warmed up, so everyone gather round."

"Debbie's not here yet," Bobby pointed out as the dancers skidded forward to sit in front of Derek.

Indifferently, the director shrugged "She'll get here eventually, right now I need you all to know that you are great in this. Even though we haven't have all the rehearsal we may have wanted, we've pulled it together with a lot of hard work and I honestly think you're all going to be fantastic out there. This is your time to shine, don't forget to enjoy it and remember everything we've been working on for months. Now-"

"Derek!" Bobby stood up, phone in hand "Debbie's been hit by a car, she's in the hospital and she's broke her legs in five places."

Without even blinking, Derek turned to Ivy "Do you know it?"

"Know what?" Ivy feigned ignorance even though anyone who knew her could see the ambitious glint of opportunity in her eyes.

Rolling his eyes incredulously at her false-misunderstanding, he explained "Do you know the part of Charlotte, I've seen you helping Debbie with the blocking and choreography but do you know it well enough to go out there and play her in front of an audience?"

"Of course," she nodded "But who'll do my part?"

Derek just rubbed the back of his neck and sighed "I'll work something out. Now all of you get into whatever you've brought in the way of costume, this is your ten minute call." Since this was just a workshop, they didn't have any official costumes but the girls had been asked to bring skirts because they would better emphasise some of the dances. With those words he paced out of the room, to greet the investors which were gathering in the corridor with Eileen.

As soon as he was gone, the cast was moving. Some were rushing to Bobby to see if he had any more information about poor Debbie. Others were hurrying to congratulate Ivy which Elizabeth thought was pretty insensitive, in the circumstances. Everyone else was slipping on skirts over dance leggings or checking hair and make-up.

All at once, Elizabeth felt a lot more nervous, everything the song had done to take away her nervous energy was undone. Although she had been nervous before, at least she'd known that Debbie and Karen would cover for any mistakes she made. Ivy hated her, there was no guarantee there that she wouldn't let Elizabeth crash and burn given the chance.

"Hey," Charlie brushed his fingers down her arm leaving a trail of electric goose-bumps in his wake "All the colour just went from your face, you okay?"

Awkwardly, she turned to him "Why does Ivy hate me so much?"

There was a pause as he stared at her blankly, his jaw setting as though her words had upset him. His eyes flickered up for a second, to look at Ivy before he met Elizabeth's gaze once more. Then he shot the younger girl a dashing smile "I honestly don't know."

"Lizzie!" Karen hurried over to them both, with a slight nod at Charlie "I know what that looked like-"

"What, what looked like?" she replied distractedly, as Charlie backed off casually to talk to Bobby.

Rubbing the back of her neck, she clarified "Me walking in with Derek like that but I swear nothing happened, he just ended up crashing at my place last night." There was a kind of panic in Karen's expression that was almost scary, like she expected some sort of huge reaction from Elizabeth which she just didn't express.

"Karen, it's fine," she frowned, glancing around at the rest of the cast "If you say nothing happened then nothing happened and even if it had, why would I care?"

With a slow nod, Karen sighed in confused relief "Right, right, of course."

It was then that the whole cast turned to Reagan who had just poked her head round the door "Places everyone."

So, as good lucks were mumbled, Elizabeth hastily pulled on her skirt over her leggings and went out to the rehearsal room with the rest of the cast.

dddddd

It didn't take a rocket scientist to know that they were cutting this close and even without Derek having to promote Ivy to replace Debbie and a dancer to replace Ivy, he had been nervous. Now he was only just controlling his muscles enough not to shake like a leaf in the autumn breeze. Around him were investors, the creative team, family of the main cast and crew and a few random people who he was sure Eileen had a good reason for inviting. There was one particular member of the audience, however, that Derek was simply desperate to impress. Kate was sat behind him and he could practically feel her breathing. Why was it that he was so tuned into her after all this time?

As the chorus members scuttled out to start the show with old William Harvey beside them, Derek glanced at Eileen beside him and crossed his fingers, something he hadn't done since his first professional show.

Surprisingly it was all going remarkably well throughout the first act. Even when Ivy performed Charlotte's big solo, which Derek was convinced would go wrong, it went without a hitch. In fact, Ivy was stunning, she did things with the song he'd never thought of and yet were spectacular. For a moment, he was reminded of how brilliant she could be if he just stopped over-thinking and let it come from her heart.

Then the dynamic between the three sisters stunned him once more. It was very clear that Ivy disliked both Karen and Elizabeth but that worked because that was exactly the way the Brontë sisters were. The chemistry was perfect.

"_There's a spoonful of sugar,_

_And an open book on the desk,_

_There's a hope of better,_

_In the impossible task,_" the way that Elizabeth and Ivy caught the crunch harmonies was heart wrenching. That was added to the way both acted it so well, the pride deep inside Derek grew. It was then he knew, without a shadow of a doubt, that this would be his greatest work.

However, as they reached scene twenty-one of the first act, Derek's nerves were back. It was too long. Everything there was brilliant but there was too much, he could feel the audience getting restless. Then, the worst happened, the dancer who'd taken Ivy's old part forgot her line. From down the row, Julia glared at him, as though it was his fault she'd forgotten.

"Please don't go," Karen breathed, barely audible but enough to fill the heart-wrenching silence "Anne will be devastated."

Taking Karen's lead, Ivy added "We all will be."

Then the poor girl managed to pick up the scene and it was almost unnoticeable but that didn't really matter because Derek knew and it was giving him a headache. He almost managed to forget though, watching Karen and Elizabeth in the second reprise of _Can't You Just See It_. It was the scene when you first began to sense that Emily didn't quite live in the real world. The wide-eyed way that Karen played it was just magical as she asked the younger girl to join her in the fantasy where she lived her life. All the fairytale princes that occupied Emily's fantasies were portrayed so honestly. It was like they were Karen's fantasies too.

Maybe they were.

cccccc

Backstage once more as they prepared to wait out the intermission, Elizabeth beamed at Charlie who beamed just as widely back before turning away. There, sitting in the window, was Ivy. She'd broken his heart that morning and now she had the nerve to look so tragically beautiful, sat there looking out at the city. The mixed messages he got from her constantly made his head spin.

With a sigh of resignation, he walked towards her and leant on the wall near where she sat "You were great out there."

"I thought I told you that we shouldn't talk any more," Ivy replied in barely more than a whisper, her sapphire gaze still focussed on the horizon.

Nodding, he replied "You did, but you didn't tell me why."

"I've been telling you for weeks, Charlie, I'm no good for you," she looked at him then, a vulnerability in her face that he thought she only ever showed to him.

How could a person feel so angry and melted at the same time, like your heart was butter and stone all at once "Don't you think that's for me to decide?"

"No, I've got all these scars and problems and you don't need that. You need her," she gestured to where Elizabeth was stood with Karen "All bright and just starting out, the way I used to be."

Hurt pulsing through his veins, he whimpered "Can't you be that way again?"

"No, once you've lost it you can't get it back," she shook her head and a solitary tear slid down her cheek as she reached up to cradle his face in her hand "If I were five years younger and hadn't been let down too many times, then maybe we could have gone somewhere but you need somebody with all the hope that I can see there in you. So go get her and forget me."

He cast a look back at Elizabeth, he wasn't going to deny that there was something there between them but it wasn't what he had with Ivy "How could I ever-"

"You will," she interrupted "And who knows, maybe you're perfect for each other."

Maybe Charlie would have said something else if it hadn't been then that Derek hadn't called their attention "Right boys and girls, brilliant first act. Ivy, you're fantastic, Debbie should watch her back, you're certainly an amazing Charlotte. Gemma, wherever you are-" the poor dancer who'd forgotten her lines appeared, tear-stained, from a group of friends "-no-one noticed your little slip-up apart from me and Julia, you're lucky Karen and Ivy had the initiative to cover for you but you needn't beat yourself up about it, now let's go out and have an even better act two. Good luck everybody, five minutes."

kkkkkk

Karen knew that the second act was going well. It was just a case of them pulling off the rest of the show. She leant heavily on Elizabeth as they moved across to the stage-block that was her death-bed. This was her big scene, where she had to go completely insane before dying rather more dramatically than she thought was really appropriate but this was theatre.

"You can't leave me Emmy," Elizabeth whimpered and Karen could see her building up the emotion required to build up real tears on stage "Not Bran and you so close, we've gone through so much together you and me."

With a withering smile, Karen squeezed the younger girl's hand "We still will, it's nothing, I'll be just fine."

"And what if you're not?" Ivy asked, as she stood slightly back from the bed, eyes looking anywhere but at them "If you would just let us call for a doctor."

Eyes burning, Karen pushed herself up into sitting, with a little help from Elizabeth and sung "_Don't ask me to take your cure,_

_Don't tell me you can heal me,_

_Don't call the man who claims to know,_

_All the ailments that cage my soul._"

Suddenly, Karen felt like she was back months before, sat with Derek and a piano backing on a CD. That moment when the intensity in his gaze had captured her so utterly and completely. As she sang to the audience, she found his face and saw the same awestruck expression that she'd only seen on him a few times. Even across the room, she could feel an undeniable connection that raked through her very soul.

Then, on the shuddering vibrato of the final note as she fell back and the other two girls brought in a harmony with the words "sweet sister", she saw his image imprinted on the back of her eyelids. Those pale eyes so wide and adoring, that savvy expression completely wiped from his face and tears trailing down his face. Karen wondered how many performances had actually made Derek Wills cry.

dddddd

There was no doubt that the workshop had gone as well as it could of and it had certainly revealed some flaws in the show which could now be rectified. However, Eileen clearly wasn't entirely happy so Derek was sure there would be more trials to come. He wasn't sure why he was still in the rehearsal room, some sort of need to clear his head after the way Karen had met his gaze. Damn it, this girl would be the death of him.

"Derek," he turned to see Kate stood in the middle of the rehearsal room, a shaky smile on her face.

At the sight of her, he couldn't help but grin "Hi Kate."

Here there was an elongated pause as both people waited for the other to speak. Eventually, it was Kate who spoke "The show really is great, I guess I finally understand why my Lizzie is so attached to it."

"Everyone who has become involved with the project is absolutely in love with it," he told her, plainly "I don't see how anyone could possibly tear themselves away."

Solemnly, she nodded "I see that now and so, I'm going to stop trying to convince Lizzie to leave the show."

"You were-" he stopped mid-sentence, realising that it wasn't that question that he wanted to ask at all "Why are you telling me this?"

A sad sort of smile graced Kate's features "We used to tell each other everything, do you remember?"

"How could I forget?" he grinned at the memories.

Reaching out for his hand, she searched his eyes "Why did we stop?"

"Because," Derek swallowed, his smile fading as his eyes bored into hers "Because we wanted different things, I gave you up for my career."

Even though it wasn't what she'd come there to ask, she found the question rolling off her tongue before she could stop herself "If I had followed you out to New York, do you think we would still be together?"

"I don't know, maybe but..." he trailed off, glancing away from her. Maybe but what about the way Karen completely flipped his world on its head. If Kate had asked him that question before he did bombshell he would have said yes but since his Marilyn had shaken him up, he wasn't so sure.

In that moment that he broke off eye contact she seemed to realise that she was heading down a slippery slope slicked with tears which almost killed her the first time she'd climbed back up it. So she dropped the subject and took a couple of steps away from him to clear her head "Look, what I really came to ask you was, will you keep an eye on Lizzie for me, she's young and she's naive and I'd feel a lot safer if I knew that someone I trust was watching out for her."

"In what way?" he frowned at her, sceptical of her intentions.

With a shrug, Kate replied "Well, for example that boy she's always talking about, Charlie isn't it? I'd appreciate it if you could keep her and him a safe distance from one another."

"That could be hard, considering they _are_ love interests," he pointed out, all the vulnerability sliding from his expression as his business face clicked into place.

Stroking a loose lock of hair from her face, she explained "Not on stage, obviously, but when they're not working-"

"With all due respect Kate," he interrupted, that signature snark creeping into his tone "It really isn't any of my business, I don't just go poking around in my actresses' personal lives, you know?"

Venomously, she retorted "No, you just go poking around your actresses."

"Hey, where did that come from?" he through his hands up in defence, as she drew back into herself, tearful eyes looking at him with years of bitterness.

All at once, years of feelings bound up inside her came bursting out hysterically "What if I did follow you to New York, only about a month after you'd left? What if you were working on a production with a pretty young actress who was sexy and fashionable and talented? What if you were already knocking her off when I got there? What if it killed me to see you walking out of your apartment in the early morning with your arm around that slut's waste? What if I'd really needed you then and you couldn't even keep it in your pants for a bloody month!?"

"Yeah, well what if I was heartbroken too?" he fired back, tears brimming in his own eyes "What if I was just trying to get over the one who I was convinced was end game for me? What if I didn't know you were in the same bloody country as me, never mind the same city?"

Half-laughing bitterly, she paced towards him with words laced with acid "Oh yes the poor heartbroken director who bounced back after a month!"

"It's not bouncing back when you shut yourself off from all emotion," he hissed back, remembering the nights with girls he never gave a damn about and living for the work without caring about anything "The pain is that bad that you have to detach from the world just to cope, don't you dare make me the villain in this, I hurt just as much as you."

All her muscles tense with emotion, she practically growled "You have no idea what I went through!"

"Really?" he shook his head, the tsunamis of unnameable and mixed feelings coursing through his veins "Okay, _sweetheart_, what did you go through that I didn't?"

Before she could think about what she was doing, she screamed "My parents chucked me out because I was pregnant with your baby!"

"What?" he stopped, all the fight going out of him, simply on hearing those words.

Her hands flew to her mouth and she looked up at him with wide, scared eyes as she stammered out "L-l-lizzie, she's yours."


	9. Responsibility

**Author Note – This is a bridge chapter really, it makes me laugh how many of you realised that Derek was Elizabeth's father. Thanks for all the amazing comments.**

Derek wasn't sure exactly how long he'd been curled up in a ball with his head between his knees but his legs were starting to cramp up. It had been years since his body had ached with emotion like this, he'd forgotten the burn of the blood in your veins and arteries, the twisting of your insides that made you want to scream and the freeze of the mind to stop all rational thought.

There was no-one he could talk to, the lonely life he lived had left little room for friends. He thought about calling Eileen but she was in talks with investors tonight, he'd be murdered if he interrupted that. The only other person he could talk to was Karen and he didn't think he could face her yet. Sure she knew some of his secrets and he'd opened up to her more than most of the people in his life but there were some things he wasn't ready to tell her. So that just left him to sit in his apartment and try to work things through on his own.

Okay, fact one: he had a daughter. What was so scary about that? Well, she was seventeen and beautiful. Did being her father mean he had to veto her boyfriends? Was it now his job to tell her that her skirt was too short or to reprimand her for missing curfew? This was a whole other human being who he'd helped create, she was part of him. More than that, she was the best of him, he knew her and she was brilliant, beautiful, talented and kind, so much better than he'd ever be.

That brings us right on to fact two: this girl was one of the most talented actresses he'd ever seen. Had he noticed that before though or was it this new connection talking, he couldn't remember? God, she had him questioning his own integrity.

Fact three: he loved Karen Cartwright. Where did this leave them? This was some serious baggage, sure Karen and Elizabeth got on really well but a young woman like her wouldn't want to get bogged down with some second-hand kid. He'd always been older than Karen but having a child made him feel so much older, like he had suddenly aged ten years. It was like he'd grown up more in the last couple of hours than he had in those eighteen years since he'd left Kate.

What was it about productions with Karen that completely flipped his world on its head?

tttttt

Wandering around the kitchen in the apartment he shared with Sam, Tom hummed one of the melodies he'd written for Brontë, making slight adjustments as he thought it through. He didn't consider himself the best cook in the world but he could find his way around a kitchen and knew a few dishes he was quite proud of.

Quite in his own world, he didn't notice Sam until two strong arms wound around his waist "Good morning."

Smiling at the warmth of his boyfriend's touch, Tom sighed "You really shouldn't sneak up on me like that."

"Oh shut up," he chuckled, his chest vibrating against Tom with the sound "You know you love it."

With a sigh of contentment, he leant back against Sam "Hmm, but the day I admit it you'll know there's something up, now off-" he slapped his hand playfully "-I'm trying to cook breakfast."

"That I can't argue with," Sam pulled away and wandered through to the living room. He fell back on the couch and watched the older man put together the food. A thoughtful expression took over his face, which Tom tried and failed not to notice.

Looking up from the eggs, the composer asked "What are you thinking about?"

"How do you know I was thinking about anything?" he asked, a lazily playful smile tugging at his lips.

As he turned away to put the oven on, Tom said simply "There are some things a boyfriend just knows."

"Hm," even though he couldn't see it, Tom knew that Sam was frowning, it was just something in his voice.

Without turning round, he questioned "What?"

"Nothing, I just..." Sam trailed off before regaining some confidence "Do you ever think of being more than just boyfriends?"

Now he turned, slowly, to face him and swallowed "What's more than boyfriends?"

"Well, you know?" he squirmed under Tom's blue gaze "Like, do you ever think about getting married?" Tom's stomach turned at the word. Alarm bells started going off in his head, saying get out now. Thoughts of his parents' marriage hurtled through his head, all the fights and walk-outs and his little sister crying with her hands over her ears. The pictures in the photo album of the happy smiles before they tied the knot. It was that word, married, it destroyed relationships, even Frank and Julia had their problems.

Tom could tell that Sam was getting uncomfortable in the long silence but it was then that the phone rang and he rushed for it, knowing it would save him from this awkward conversation. Especially since he wasn't sure what his answer was yet. He'd thought about spending the rest of his life with Sam, about kids and picket fences, just not marriage.

"Hello, Leavitt and Strickland, how can I help you?"

"Tom, that is the most pretentious way to answer the phone I have ever heard," Derek's voice came on the phone, his sarcastic tone a little tired as he spoke. Derek tired? This was a hard show.

Rolling his eyes, dramatically, at Sam, he groaned "What do you want Derek?" Awkwardly, Sam turned away and stood up, glancing once back over his shoulder before disappearing into the bedroom. Even without saying anything, Tom knew he'd hurt Sam because in cases like this it wasn't what you said but what you didn't say that mattered.

"I want Sam in early because I want to go through _Fire and Brimstone_ today," Derek said simply.

As his eyes followed Sam across to the door, Tom tried to ignore the ache inside him "I'll tell him, we'll both be there in a few."

eeeeee

"Mum, I'm leaving!" Elizabeth cried as she opened the door, grabbing her bag from its place by the door.

Rushing out into the hall, Kate cried "Wait!"

"What?" the girl huffed in a tone that is only used when a teenage girl talks to her mother.

In a tumble of words, Kate said "I just think that you should know-" she stopped mid-sentence.

"What Mum, what should I know?" she folded her arms irritably "Because Derek isn't going to kill me if I'm late for rehearsal _at all_."

With a nod, the older woman curled her arms around herself defensively "Of course, you should go, I love you."

"Love you too," she shook her head and paced out into the hall. As she left the building she met Harry on the pavement. There was something about Harry that was so perfect and innocent. Every morning he would be there to walk her to work before he went to school, like some knight in armour ready to protect her at all costs. It was cute and so romantic.

Taking her hand, he grinned "Ready for another day in the office?"

"Really Harry?" she laughed, as they began to walk.

Cheekily he winked "Yep."

They practically danced all the way to the studio, pushing and pulling their way round each other in perfect harmony. Something about them just fit, from years of practise and a little bit of natural empathy. Once they got there, however, Elizabeth spotted Charlie walking from the other direction with Bobby at his side.

"Lizzie, hi!" Charlie waved, jogging across the space between them to meet her "I didn't get the chance to tell you how great you were at the workshop on Friday."

A smile lighting up her face, the teenager replied "Thanks Charlie, you weren't so bad yourself."

"Yeah well, my girl always puts on a good show," Harry wound his arm around her waist, eyeing Charlie suspiciously.

Remembering that the boys didn't know each other, Elizabeth said "Oh right, Charlie, this is my boyfriend, Harry, and Harry, this Charlie, he plays Arthur Bell Nichols and William Weighton, and the guy waiting impatiently over there is Bobby who plays my brother, Branwell."

"Nice to meet you," Charlie flashed Harry a dashing half-smile before grabbing Elizabeth's hand and pulling her away "But we really have to get in, Bobby's just got a text from Ivy that Derek's really moody this morning, see you lover boy."

Harry didn't even get the chance to shout a goodbye after them before all three disappeared into the studio.

kkkkkk

Karen glanced up as Elizabeth ran in late with Bobby and Charlie. All of the cast were sat round at Derek's feet as he listed all of the changes he, and the creative team, had made since seeing the workshop. Some would be ran in more detail later to assess the real changes but right now they were mainly cutting entire scenes.

"Nice for you three to join us," Derek commented without looking up, all the usual sarcasm in his tone but something missing. Nobody but Karen would have noticed but there was a kind-of-wobble in his voice. Even when the three latecomers sat down, he seemed to be avoiding looking at Elizabeth, as though he was scared to see her. It was really odd and Karen couldn't find any way to explain it... unless...

The young girl blushed "Sorry, we er..."

"I don't need your excuses," Derek replied dryly, glancing up at her and then quickly glanced back at his notes. This was quite normal for Derek but Karen saw it was much more nervous than usual.

It couldn't be.

"Just make sure you catch up on what you've missed."

That was so sick.

"I will, I don't expect you to repeat everything for me."

Even Derek wasn't that perverted.

"Good, because I'm not, now please sit down, you've held up this rehearsal long enough without causing an unneeded dispute."

There was absolutely no way that Derek could have feelings for Elizabeth. That could not possibly be the reason that he was so jumpy. Apart from anything he had loved Kate, falling for the daughter was wrong on so many levels, aside from the fact that that made him more than old enough to be her father. Then again, in his own words, Derek "made a point of having an intimate relationship with all of his leading ladies" what did youth have to do with it?

"Now, I spoke to Debbie this morning," Derek threw aside his notes "And she says she's got an offer for another show and, since she's going to have to miss a lot of rehearsals while her leg heals anyway, she's quitting to do that which means, despite the fact I think she's much too pretty to be Charlotte, Ivy is now the oldest Brontë sister."

The cast applauded, some with more enthusiasm than others but all Karen could think was: what if Elizabeth is more than just an employee to him?


	10. Distractions

"Hey Derek, er call me when you get this or just ask Sam to give me a call, whatever's easiest," Tom leant in the door-frame as his eyes rested on Julia sprawled on the couch "Anyway, I just called to tell you that Julia and I aren't in today because Julia's down with flu and I'm going to take care of her. Send us any notes you have and we'll consider them with the usual enthusiasm. Thanks, speak to you later."

As he hung up, Julia commented hoarsely "You don't have to look after me, I'll be fine on my own and Frank's checking in between lessons anyway-"

"Julia," he interrupted her, sliding his phone into his pocket "Do you remember three years ago when we were working on Lily and Roger?"

Groggily, she chuckled "That was one awful show."

"I know but I had that sickness bug and you stayed off for days to make sure I was all right, you even helped me to the bathroom so I could throw up. Friends do that for each other," he said with a determined glint in his eye.

Sniffing, she smiled gratefully "Thanks Tom."

"Besides, a rehearsal alone with Derek, one of us would not be coming out alive," he grinned, sitting on the arm chair near her feet.

With a shrug, she pulled her blankets up to her chin "You wouldn't be alone, you'd have Sam." Even in her ill and unobservant state, Julia noticed the change in her partner's expression at Sam's name. "What?"

"Nothing," he shook his head dismissively but Julia didn't buy it.

She wiggled into a more comfortable position "Spill Tom."

"It's stupid Julia," he whined, running his fingers through his hair and leaning back in his chair. Nevertheless, she looked at him with her best puppy-dog look and he caved in a minute "He just asked me if I'd thought about getting married and it was like my love-life flashed before my eyes. All I could think about was my parents and the fighting and how getting married ruined everything for them."

Sceptically, Julia pointed out "Tom, you and Sam are anything but your parents, you two just have a completely different dynamic."

"Do we?" he sighed, a hint of worried desperation in his voice "I mean, my mum and I are so alike and-"

"Okay, you are nothing like your mother," she interrupted "Your mother is a suppressed control freak with a serious OCD complex."

Cocking his head to one side, Tom frowned "And I'm not?"

"No, well, not most of the time," she protested weakly before saying softly "But you certainly aren't the dragon that basically imprisoned you until you went away to college and then still dropped in to surprise you every five minutes, not to mention criticising every single decision you made."

With concern bright in his eyes, he leant forward and pressed his hand to her forehead "Should you really be getting so worked up about this, you're still sick, remember?"

"I know, look I'm fine, it actually feels nice to have something else to focus on," she rubbed her watering eyes "My point is that you are not your mother and Sam is certainly not your Dad, for a start, I don't think your Dad can pirouette like Sam. And, unlike your parents, I'm pretty sure you and Sam are never going to find yourselves involved in a shot-gun wedding."

Laughter broke Tom's dark expression as he chuckled "That's certainly true."

"What's really scaring you here is not that your parents' marriage was such a shambles, or even the idea of spending the rest of your life with Sam, it's that the word marriage invokes the natural fear of commitment you've had for as long as I've known you," Julia explained, yawning slightly and revealing how the illness was taking most of her energy "So man up and realise that Sam is endgame for you."

Serenely, he smiled at her "How do you get me the way you do?"

"I'm your best friend, Tom, it's my job," she sighed and sniffed "Now pass me the tissues and put on Les Miserables."

He smiled and set to work. Sometimes he thought that he could have married that woman, in different circumstances, obviously.

kkkkkk

Derek strolled into the middle of the room and called them to order "Right boys and girls, as you can see we are sans composers today, all questions and queries to Mr Strickland over there. Anyway let's run er... let's run..." Okay that was weird, Derek never hesitated. It just didn't happen, he always knew exactly what they were going to run, in what order and why.

"Scene nine of act two," Reagan interjected, trying to be helpful and only gaining a glare from Derek.

Through gritted teeth, Derek replied "I knew that."

Karen thought that it was just as well that Tom wasn't there because she could practically hear the sarcastic _of course you did _which would have come from his direction. Even though Karen had been seeing it for days, now she knew that everyone was noticing the change in Derek. He was distracted, erratic and so un-Derek.

Quietly, Karen wandered to her place, meeting Ivy and Elizabeth as they waited for their cue. For the rest of the rehearsal, everyone seemed on edge. Derek's communication was all over the place and, as a result, he became even more irritable than usual. The snide comments were flying all over the place and, eventually, just as he practically screamed at one of the small part girls, Becky, Karen had to step forward "Derek, you're being unreasonable!"

"I'm sorry, am I speaking English? All I want is for you to not turn your back on the bloody audience!" he cried "How is that unreasonable? Don't most decent actors learn that as foetuses, am I working with complete amateurs?"

Stepping to Karen's side, Elizabeth answered with a voice hard as stone "No, you're working with professionals, Tony winners and stars who deserve your respect and should not have to put up with being screamed at for nothing."

"If you think my direction is nothing than, perhaps, you shouldn't be working on this show," he hissed, malice on his face "Or in show business at all, as a matter of fact."

With a thoughtful (if angry) nod, she paced across the studio and picked up her dance bag "Maybe I'm not. I'm going to cool off." She then walked calmly out of the studio and Karen would have followed her if she hadn't promised herself she'd confront Derek as soon as she got the chance.

"Well, I guess that's lunch," Eileen declared, with a slight smile and an eagle-eyed glance in Derek's direction.

As everyone split off into their usual groups, Karen hurried over to Derek and tried to hide the anger in her voice when she asked him "Would you accompany me to lunch, Derek?"

"Er, yes I will," he replied and followed her out of the studio, as she had taken off towards the door as soon as she'd asked the question.

For quite a while they walked in silence and, even in his current state of distraction, Derek could tell Karen was angry. That made his own heart twist with guilt because he was well aware that he was the cause of it. Everything in his head though was so jumbled that he could barely split emotion from work any more. It was all just a mix of words and images that made no rational sense whatsoever.

At last, Karen turned to him "What's wrong with you lately, you haven't been yourself for days and now you've taken to treating us all like dirt? You've always been a tough director, Derek, but you've never been a bad one."

"It's just been a hard week, that's all," he shrugged, without looking at her.

Shaking her head, she commented "And now you're acting like a moody teenager."

"_Please_," he rolled his eyes incredulously and his gaze suddenly met hers. Suddenly all he could think about was how beautiful she was. Those amazing baby bird eyes and the auburn hair that curled in the most perfect way. This was the woman he loved. If he needed someone to talk to about this with, maybe she was the one. When he thought about it, there was no-one he trusted more, no-one who understood him like she did. So, he was about to tell her when-

"Hey!" Karen's eyes had landed on Elizabeth, stood further down the street. She was gripping onto her dance bag for dear life as a man twice her size tried to heave it out of her hands.

Following her gaze, Derek found his daughter and shouted "You leave her alone!" Then he set off in a sprint down the road, carried by some unexplainable protective instinct. As soon as he saw Derek, the assailant let go of the bag and rushed away, causing Elizabeth to fall back. Once he was sure that the guy was gone, Derek turned back and lifted Elizabeth to her feet "Are you okay?"

"Yeh, a little shook up, but I'm fine," she said, but then looked past the director's shoulder, where the man had disappeared and the shock hit. Suddenly she was crying into Derek's shoulder and holding onto him tight. With a hint of shock in his face, he hugged her back just as Karen reached them.

Blinking, Derek met Karen's gaze over the teenager's shoulder "Karen, why don't you give Kate a call and she can come to pick Lizzie up."

With a nod, Karen picked up the bag, which was now on the floor, and led the way back to the studio. In one swift movement, Derek swept Elizabeth up into his arms, bridal-style, and considered that, even for a dancer, she was really light.

As soon as they were inside, Derek saw Karen on the phone to Kate and that Charlie was already out in the corridor, setting up a couple of chairs. Worry was plain in the boy's eyes as he hurried over and asked "Karen told us what happened, is she okay?"

"She's fine, Charlie, just in shock," he replied, pacing over to sit her down on one of the chairs "I'm going to sit out here with her, until her mum turns up, so you can go back through and calm the masses."

Charlie took one look at Elizabeth's tear-stained face and shook his head "No way, am I leaving her alone with you."

"I don't appreciate that insinuation Mr Montague," the director responded coldly, his eyes darkening in contempt of the sick minds that would think he would harbour designs feelings for a girl so young. Nevertheless, for the sake of his daughter's reputation, he added "Besides, Karen's going to sit with us too, so if you'd fetch her a chair and then kindly leave us be."

Tight-lipped, the young actor frowned at the girl before pacing back into the studio to grab an extra chair and update his cast-mates. Watching him go, Karen said "Well, Kate says it'll take her about half-an-hour to get here, so you'll have to wait it out, Lizzie."

"I don't need to go home," she whimpered, her voice shaky "I'll be fine once I get going."

With a fond half-smile, Derek told her "Art isn't therapy, darlin', you need to give yourself a little time to process what happened and what could have happened before you go back to work."

"Why are you being so nice to me?" she looked up at him through her dark eyelashes in exactly the same way her mother used to.

For a moment, he considered telling her that he was her father, but he was sure Kate would kill him and he wasn't ready to really take on the responsibility of acknowledging her paternity "Because I promised your mother I would."

"Was that what you were talking about?" Elizabeth let her head fall onto Derek's shoulder "That night Harry and I caught you two together?"

Glancing up at Karen, he replied "You could say that, yeah."

"Good," she yawned "Because I thought you two might have been together and that would have been so awkward." It was just as well that she seemed to drift off to sleep at that moment because Derek wasn't quite sure how to respond to that.

Finally, Charlie brought a chair through, put it down, cast a long look at Elizabeth and slid back into the studio. As she sat down next to Derek, Karen asked "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I guess we should probably report that guy to the police, I reckon I could give them a good description of him and he might well have hit someone else after he left us," he pondered, gently stroking a lock of loose hair from the younger girl's face.

Watching the small gesture, she shuffled sheepishly "I take back what I said earlier, about you being a bad director, everyone has off days and I don't have any right to judge until I know the full circumstances. I just felt like I needed to defend the rest of the cast and picked a fight with you but, it's clear now that you're a lot more caring than I give you credit for."

"Only to the people that matter to me," he said softly, more to himself than anyone else and he hadn't really meant for Karen to hear. Somehow though, he just couldn't keep anything from her.

Curiously, she cocked her head to one side "I just don't understand why she matters to you, the way you spoke to Charlie back there rules out any romantic attachment and you've never made an effort to become her friend so why on earth would she-" she stopped short, mouth hanging open in the cutest way possible as her eyes widened like sources "How long ago did you date Kate?"

"About eighteen years ago," he mumbled. Of course, Karen only needed to do the maths to figure it out, when he'd actually needed it spelling out to him by Kate. The brilliant Derek Wills hadn't even thought about how old Elizabeth was when he'd found out she was Kate's daughter. Maybe it was a girl thing.

Feeling Elizabeth shift on his shoulder, he put a finger to his lips and pointed at the teenager. In seconds, Karen understood, pointedly closing her mouth. Still though, her eyes darted between the two faces of her companions, looking for resemblance. Now she knew to look for them, there were many. The black hair and the natural way she could draw the eye. In personality, they both had an easy confident swagger and sarcasm, as well as a natural drive. It was uncanny.

Then Kate charged down the corridor, eyes wide with fear and concern "Is she okay?"

"She's fine, Kate," Derek replied "Just in shock I reckon."

Blearily, Elizabeth looked up at her mother "Mummy."

"Come on, sweetheart," she helped her daughter up and led her back up the corridor. As a sort of after-thought, she glanced back over her shoulder and half-smiled "Thanks for looking after her for me."

With a shrug, Derek replied "Any time."

Once she was sure that both women were out of earshot, Karen asked "How long have you known?"

"Earlier, you said that I hadn't been myself for weeks," he said by way of explanation "It's because I've been distracted, thinking about what my reaction to this is supposed to be. I don't have a clue how to be a father, least of all a father to a teenage girl. Maybe I could cope with a son but... my mum up and left when I was six, just after my youngest brother was born. My dad was an ass and she just couldn't cope. That means, growing up, there really weren't any women around, just my little sister and she was sent off to boarding school as soon as she could walk... I don't know what you're supposed to do with a daughter."

A serene smile graced Karen's face and she reached for his hand "Love her."

"What?" he frowned, trying to ignore the undeniable warmth that flushed from the contact.

Squeezing his hand, she clarified "All you have to do is love her, as long as you care for her, you're doing it right."


	11. The Party

Sam and Ivy sat in a tiny café just off Broadway, sipping coffee and debating whether all the dancing they did in Brontë justified all the calories in one of the incredibly sugary iced buns on display at the counter. Eventually, they bought one to share and settled down into friendly conversation.

"Are you invited to this party that Eileen's having Derek throw in an attempt to reel in investors?" Ivy asked, as she took another sip of her coffee.

With a nod, Sam shrugged "I think they were sort of obliged to invite me because Tom can't go without his arm-candy."

"Oh stop that right now," she shook her head, reaching for the cake "You are so much more than Tom's arm candy. Not just because you're ridiculously talented but because you and Tom are going to last forever."

Awkwardly, he glanced out the window at the people walking by "Maybe."

"Sam?" she frowned curiously at him "What's wrong?"

Rubbing the back of his neck, he sighed "I've been thinking of proposing to Tom for awhile-"

"Oh my God, Sam, that's so great!" Ivy began to gush shamelessly.

He held his hand up to stop her "Let me finish."

"Sorry," she pressed her lips together pointedly, but still smiled through her silence.

With a laboured breath, he leant back in his chair "I've been thinking of proposing for awhile but, about a week ago, I guess, I asked him if he'd ever thought about getting married and he looked at me like I'd asked him if he'd ever thought of murdering me in my sleep."

"Well, that's-"

"It's a wake-up call, that's what it is," Sam interrupted "I thought I'd got past Tom's extreme fear of commitment, but after five years he still can't stand the idea of spending his life with someone, not even me."

Sympathetically, she reached out to lay her hand over his "You're panicking over one facial expression, Sam. Maybe all Tom's scared of is the institution of marriage. Or it might just be that he's never thought about marrying you and you just shocked him. Once he's gotten used to the idea, he might love it. Tom's parents didn't have the best marriage, you have to give him a little time and space to work things out."

"When did you become so wise?" he shook his head in semi-disbelief.

A smug smile graced Ivy's lips as she pulled away "Since I became everybody's agony aunt, now come on, we should get back to rehearsal, arm-candy." The two walked out of the café and hurried back towards the studio where the rest of the cast was gathered.

eeeeee

Stood in front of the mirror, Elizabeth tried to figure out how to wear her hair to the party at Derek's apartment. Behind her, Harry was sat cross-legged on the bed, his bright eyes wide as he watched her messing with grips, ribbons and hair-bands.

Meeting her gaze in the mirror, he suggested "Wear it the way you used to for school, with that white ribbon in the high-pony."

"Don't you think that's a little too cute for my first show-business party as an adult actress?" she asked, spinning around so her black haired fanned out over her shoulders. For a moment all Harry wanted to was to tell her that, however she wore her hair, she'd light up the room. All he could think about was taking her in his arms and never letting her go ever again.

Despite this, he simply brought his knees up so that he could rest his chin on them and said "But you are cute."

"Oh, sweetheart, that's nice," she leant down and pecked his lips, gently, before turning back to the mirror.

With a fond roll of his eyes, he stood up and came up behind her "You want my advice?" She leant back onto his chest as he wrapped his arms around her waist and rested his chin on her shoulder "Just wear it down, because all guys love a girl with her hair down and you, you just look like some exotic princess when you wear it down... it's practically sinful."

"Okay," Elizabeth breathed as her eyes drifted closed "You know you really shouldn't tease me like this."

Planting one last kiss on her cheek, he nodded "I know, but I better go, you need to get ready and your mum isn't going to trust us alone for much longer." He pulled away and she watched him leave before dumping her make-up bag on the bed, pulling her hairbrush out of her top-draw and taking the dress down from where it was hung on the back of her bedroom door. Goodbye child-star and hello real actress.

dddddd

"Derek, what _are_ you wearing?" Karen was the first one to arrive in a navy blue dress drawn in at the waist with a red sash and edged with a white collar. Her auburn hair rested in loose curls over her shoulders and there was something in those eyes that stole his breath for a second. Why did she do these things to him?

Without bothering to glance down at his usual dark jeans, leather jacket and black t-shirt, he raised an eyebrow at her own attire "I could say the same of you, Miss saucy-sailor-girl."

"All three of us, Ivy, Lizzie and I, are wearing dresses like this, we co-ordinated so we stick out as the leads, plus red, blue and white suits me," she retorted easily as she walked past him into the apartment "But everyone's dressing up tonight and you just look the same as always."

He was glad that she'd walked past and so wasn't facing him when the unfamiliar feeling of a blush started to creep up his neck. This was ridiculous, he did not blush, even for the sake of Karen Cartwright. Nevertheless, he might be a little under-dressed for a formal party such as this and he certainly wouldn't want to let down the investors. So he followed Karen "What would you have me wear then?"

"Where's that white shirt from the last time I was here?" she asked and it struck him that she was right, the last time she'd been her had been the night she'd worn nothing but a white shirt. The night of the first mistake he ever made with her. Despite this, she showed no concern for the fact that the last time she'd come here he'd asked her to sleep with him.

Shaking the thoughts from his head, he shrugged "I'm not sure, I think I might have got rid of it."

"Where's your bedroom?" she spun round to face him, white dress flying out around her and hair bouncing about her face. Between how beautiful she looked and how easily her words could have been taken as a proposition, if not for context, his head was spinning. With a quirk of her perfect eye brow, she prompted him "Derek?"

Quickly, he swept forward, towards the stairs "I'll er... show you."

"If I didn't know better," Karen teased as she followed him "I'd say you were flustered." He ignored her and led her to his room. Why hadn't he thought to make his bed this morning; tidy is room at all in fact? Papers and biographies were strewn about his floor, open on pages of interest amongst dirty clothes. It looked hectic and disorganised but Derek knew exactly where everything was. Karen looked like she was about to laugh "I must admit, Derek, I never took you for the untidy type."

A smirk turned the corners of his mouth at that, something about her gentle smile put him back at ease "People are rarely what you expect them to be, for example, I never took you for a clothes snob."

"I am not a clothes snob," she rolled her eyes "I just don't want you to feel out place." Then, after a quick glance around the room to get her bearings, she strolled over to the wardrobe.

Just as her hand hovered above the door handle, he stopped her with his best dead-pan expression "Not that one, that one has my large collection of porn." She started and looked up at him with that stunned baby-bird look that she couldn't seem to shake even after five years in the business. It was so bloody adorable that he lost his straight face and chuckled "I'm kidding, how have you maintained that innocence?"

"At least now I know what it means when a director invites you to his apartment alone in the middle of the night," she quipped as she threw open the wardrobe and began rifling through his clothes.

A thought hit him out of the blue, as he leant in the doorway of his room "Do you think Lizzie knows?"

"Knows what?" she asked, without glancing up from the task at hand.

Feeling his stomach knot and twist with images of directors gloating about the young actresses who they'd lured to their apartments. The laughing faces and smirks, stories about the girl too naive to understand the situation at first or the one who was so nervous she tripped on the way to the bedroom. "Knows what dicks directors can be?"

When she turned with a shirt in her hand, her heart practically melted. There was a look on his face that encompassed a whole kaleidoscope of emotions, from anger to concern to regret. Karen smiled with sympathy and understanding "Derek, I don't think many directors would prey on a girl so young."

"Wouldn't they?" he rubbed his temples to try and clear his aching head "She's of age, she can legally give her consent, Charlie thought I would make a move on her and, even if I do trust the integrity of my peers, she's not going to be seventeen forever, in two, three years she'll be fair game."

As she laid the outfit she'd picked out on the bed, she picked her way over clothes and books to his side "I've known Lizzie for six years and I can safely say I've never met a girl so mature and savvy. She'd got a good head on her shoulders and, more importantly, a brilliant group of people around her who will gladly step in to protect her if anyone ever tried to hurt her, me included."

"Count me in too," Derek smiled.

With a nod, she walked out of the room "I'll hold down the fort while you get changed."

It was only once she was gone that he looked at the white shirt, grey slacks and a red bow-tie, she'd colour co-ordinated the two of them. Admittedly, it wasn't his usual style, at all, but he'd Derek it up a little. Downstairs he heard the doorbell ring and turned to the mirror, it was time to face the music.

eeeeee

Elizabeth had to admit she was feeling a little out of place at this party. Sat alone on Derek's couch, she just prayed that someone would rescue her. It was like everyone was involved in conversations and she didn't know how to find one herself. So she just sat alone with her drink (lemonade, Derek had refused to give her alcohol) in her white dress with its navy blue trimming, looking like she'd been stood up.

"Hey," Charlie dropped down in the seat next to her "You look lonely."

With a shrug, she sighed "Yeah, well I guess parties aren't exactly my thing."

"Ah, shut up," he grinned "You just haven't got into the swing of it yet, come on." Taking her by the hand, he pulled her forward into the midst of a group of people gathered around, discussing the merits of the show. There was Karen, Derek and a couple of investors who Charlie grinned at "I have another person to bring to your conversation, meet Miss Elizabeth Mason, she plays Anne and is quite the Broadway veteran for being only seventeen."

She smiled nervously as Derek commented "Ah yes, quite the accomplished performer, Karen was in Les Miserables with her, not so long ago."

"Well, four years ago," Karen corrected, almost like a wife would correct a long-suffering husband.

Easily, Elizabeth quipped "Is it really only four years, it feels like an age?"

"It must be," the older actress smiled as Elizabeth began to feel comfortable "Because I came straight off Bombshell and onto Les Mis."

With a nod, Derek confirmed "Yeah, you must of left Bombshell about five years ago now, so that works out about right."

"Oh, of course," one of the investors, nodded "Most of you have worked together before, why is it that a lot of the cast of Bombshell are on this show as well, why is that?"

There was a certain edge to the director's voice as he replied "Why do you hire people for any show, because they are the best people for the job."

"I'll drink to that," Charlie downed the rest of his wine in one gulp.

Raising a critical eyebrow, Derek commented "Easy there, I still want you in for rehearsal tomorrow, you know?"

"It wouldn't be the first time I've come in with a hangover," Charlie said before he'd considered his words. Eyes widening as Derek's gaze darkened threateningly, the actor took Elizabeth's arm and slid away, smiling sheepishly "And with that, we better bow out."

With Charlie on her arm, Elizabeth didn't feel out of place any more and it was nice. Actually, it was more than just nice but let's not go into that.

At about nine, however, she and Charlie were stood looking out over the city from Derek's window, split off from conversation to enjoy each other's company for awhile. Sneaking a side-ways glance at her, he commented "A beautiful place, isn't it? Derek always did know how to do things right. If you're going to get an apartment, get the best apartment in the best city in the world."

"I think it's a little impersonal," she replied, trying not to feel his eyes wandering across her face.

Non-committally, he shrugged and then, suddenly, as though he'd only just remembered something, he grabbed her hand, beaming "But Ivy told me about this one room that's totally awesome."

"And Ivy would know, would she?" she chuckled as he pulled her through the crowd, then poked his head into a few rooms until he reached the door he was looking for. Soon they'd ducked into what must have been the most colourful room in the house. All around it were framed posters of all of the shows that Derek had ever been involved with. Then there were shelves of scripts and studio albums, folders of newspaper clippings and reviews and a cabinet of awards under the window. "Oh my God."

Eyes bright with curiosity and ambition, Charlie drunk in Derek's achievements "I know, when I'm rich and famous, I'll have a room like this."

"You want to be rich and famous?" she cocked her head to one side as she took a step towards him.

He turned and found himself almost nose to nose with her "Sure, don't you?"

"I want to perform for the rest of my life, hopefully have enough to live on, that sort of thing," Elizabeth replied "But fame isn't what I'm out to get, what I want is that rush I get when I go out on stage."

Searching her hypnotic amber eyes, he half-smiled fondly "You know, I don't think I've ever met anyone quite like you." Delicately, he let his fingers dance down her arms before he took one of her hands to lift it level with his lips "You're just perfect, in every way conceivable, I can't even begin to explain." Then he kissed the back of her hand, his gaze still focussed on hers. All rational thought left her mind as he lifted his free hand to caress her cheek. Everywhere he touched tingled and smouldered in the best possible way, leaving a residual warmth that spread through her veins straight to her heart. And when he leant closer, it was all she could do to let her eyes flicker shut before he pressed his lips to her.

Like she'd taken the best drug in the world, she was suddenly on a high. Hands wandered and lips moved as one until their revelry was suddenly broken-

"What the bloody hell do you think you're doing?" Charlie was being dragged off of her "Out. Now!" Derek practically threw the boy from the room, eyes blazing.

Confused and frustrated, Elizabeth followed them out, back into the party. The crowd split as the director pushed the boy down onto the floor. "Derek what are you doing?" Elizabeth cried, rushing to Charlie's side and helping the boy up.

"I'm stopping some thoughtless boy from preying on some sweet innocent girl," he shouted accusingly.

In moments, Karen had pushed through the crowd and was tugging Derek's arm to try and bring him to his senses "Derek."

"As much as I appreciate your concern for my welfare, how is it any of your business?" Elizabeth hissed, her head spinning with thoughts of Harry and Charlie. Between the two of them and Derek's odd behaviour, she was sure she would be stark raving bonkers by the end of the week.

Looking practically irate, Derek screamed "Because I'm your bloody father, that's why!"


	12. Meet Daddy

**Author Note – Sorry it's taken me so long to update but thank you for all the amazing comments keeping me going, as long as you keep them coming and I'll keep writing ;).**

Looking practically irate, Derek screamed "Because I'm your bloody father, that's why!" He couldn't believe he'd just said that. It was like his whole life flashed before his eyes, this may not be a near death experience but he highly doubted he'd have very long to live once Kate found out he'd let slip the secret she'd kept for eighteen years.

"Right, everybody out, now!" Karen cried and, with the help of Eileen, Julia and, surprisingly, Tom, had cleared Derek's apartment. She even pulled Reagan and one of the investors from one of Derek's guest rooms. In moments no-one was left but Eileen, Karen, Elizabeth, Charlie and Derek. Through all of this, Derek and Elizabeth stood at a sort of stale mate, staring stunned at each other and Charlie kept his place a step behind Elizabeth.

Almost as soon as the apartment was clear though, Elizabeth seemed to get her thoughts in some sort of order and turned to the boy who she had kissed "I think you should go too, Charlie."

Flashing her his puppy dog eyes, he pleaded "But, Lizzie, this is a lot to take in and-"

"And I should really talk to my _boyfriend_ about that," she interrupted him, her voice trembling slightly with guilt and shock.

With a nod, he resigned "Just call me if you need anything." Then he jammed his hands into his pockets and paced out, only sparing a moment to glance back before he closed the door to Derek's apartment behind himself.

"How do you know?" Elizabeth floated the words on air, her voice no more than a whisper.

Derek glanced up "What?"

"How do you know that I'm your daughter?" she repeated, curling her arms around her body as though she could protect herself from her own complicated emotions "Is it a guess based on my age or..."

"Kate told me," he looked to Karen for moral support and she smiled comfortingly at him as he continued "She and I met straight out of high school."

As she trembled slightly, she chuckled without humour "I do not need to hear the details, believe me."

"So what do we do now?" he asked, looking every bit the awkward teenager.

Turning to Karen, she sighed "I want to go home."

"I'll see you're back safe," Derek jumped at the opportunity he'd been given to act like a father was supposed to.

Quickly, however, Karen stepped forward "You're all right Derek, I'll do it." Just as he was about to contradict her, Eileen put a hand on Derek's arm and he let both women scuttle out of the door. His head was spinning, and he stumbled back towards the sofa before his legs lost their strength.

As soon as he had sat down, she shook her head "You baffle me, Derek, five years ago, I would never have seen this behaviour from you, what happened to make you so emotional?"

"Five years ago, you were the same career-driven charmer I was, Eileen," he pointed out, leaning forward in his seat and rubbing his temples to try and make sense of the world that was falling down around him "So what changed?"

Stubbornly, she replied "Nothing." Then he raised an eyebrow and smirked, just the way he always used to. She couldn't help but provide him with the answer he'd already predicted "Nick, that man chucked everything I knew out the window and replaced it with something so much better."

"Love," he nodded with some sort of understanding.

This time it was her turn to raise an eyebrow "Yes, love. You're not telling me that Derek Wills finally understands what that means."

"I always have understood what it means, I just used to hide that," he heaved a sigh, turning to stare out at the city "Maybe I don't want to hide any more."

With a strange light in her eyes, she sat down beside him "Do you really love her?"

"More than I ever thought possible, more than Elizabeth's mother, even," he admitted and a half-smile graced his face at the thought. It was true. He'd never thought he would love anyone more than Kate but Karen, she was the exception. The way she switched everything around and was so accepting of all of his vices, of which, he was aware, there were many. That did not mean, however, that she was unafraid to challenge him, she was quite ready to call him out as well. Karen was just different.

Smiling, she asked "So you loved her too? Wow Derek, I had no idea you were capable of so much emotion."

"It gets worse, I care for Elizabeth a lot more than I should, I only found out she was my daughter a few weeks ago and already I'm protective and I feel responsible for her welfare," he felt good revealing his feelings to his old friend, it was like a weight off of his shoulders.

Teasingly, she chuckled "Welcome to parenthood. You think you've got it hard? You didn't do the late-night feeding or the parent-teacher conferences or 'the talk', believe me Derek you don't know the half of it."

"But I've missed all of that stuff, Eileen, I missed her first steps, her first words, the first songs she sung, school plays, holding her hand as we crossed the street," he frowned "I never even thought I'd want to be involved with any of those things."

As she watched him, she said, knowingly "It's the parent's curse, it changes you, you lose your own identity and become 'Elizabeth's Dad', you never stop worrying about them when they're out of your sight, no matter how old they get or how independent. It's worth it though, it's the best job in the world."

"Now I get why you'd drop everything for Katie," he smiled to himself.

Standing and walking towards the door, she quipped "And why I'd never let you anywhere near her." Before he could protest, she was out the door and Derek was left to his own thoughts once again.

However, she was only gone a few minutes when another knock came at the door which practically made Derek jump out of his skin.

eeeeee

"Have you ever thought that I didn't actually want to talk about it?" Kate and Elizabeth had been fighting for, what felt like, hours. Both looked exhausted, hair crumpled, clothes creased and faces drawn with wearied anger.

Her voice catching as she spoke, Elizabeth retorted "Have you ever thought that I deserved to know?"

"Yes, I did," the mother admitted guiltily "But I didn't want you anywhere near Derek, I couldn't let myself be involved with him again and I knew that admitting he was the father would mean I would have to let him into our lives."

Angry but without the thought or energy for further argument, the younger girl backed off to her room "I'm too tired to talk about this tonight, I'll argue more in the morning." Elizabeth didn't know quite what to make of all that had happened tonight and was glad of the pensive solitude offered by her room.

Firstly, Charlie had kissed her. A dull aching guilt was building in her stomach, pressing on her insides and bursting to be let out in tears or screams or some other sort of emotional release. At the same time, her skin still tingled where he'd touched her. She thoroughly believed that, if Derek hadn't stopped them, she might have gone all the way with Charlie. That thought was more than scary, it was terrifying. More than anything else in the world, Elizabeth was sure that she loved Harry, he was everything to her.

Secondly, Derek was her father. What did that even mean? Did it just amount to him contributing 50% of her DNA or was she supposed to treat him like a parent now? Was she obliged to get to know him or introduce him to her boyfriends? Did she now need his permission to go to a party and could his word over-ride her mother's? Could she ask him for money when she was short? Could she go to him when she was feeling down? Would he go after boys who hurt her with a shot gun? It was all too much. Maybe it was best if she just slept.

kkkkkk

Karen strolled into rehearsals to find that the cast was already gathered but Derek was yet to arrive. Usually, groups would have split off into physical and vocal warm ups and Karen would drop her bag and join a group but today no-one was working. All around the studio, the cast had split off into gatherings of friends, all leant in and babbling in hushed tones. Trust a decent bit of gossip to be memorized by everybody in three seconds but it took centuries for them to learn their lines. She stopped short, realising that that was a very Derek thing to think.

She shook her head free of that thought and paced to the back of the room to drop her bag next to Bobby's. Within seconds, Wendy Brown, one of the small-part actresses, had scuttled to her side and asked, as though she was suddenly Karen's best friend "Did you know?"

"Did I know what?" she asked, slightly stunned by the gaul of this strange girl she'd barely talked to before.

Beaming encouragingly, Wendy explained "Did you know that Derek was Elizabeth's father?"

"If I did, what does it matter?" Karen replied as she smiled sweetly back at the girl "Everyone knows now, whether I knew before the rest of you changes nothing."

Wendy's face fell and she stalked off back to the group of dancers she'd been standing with before. Sometimes, Karen hated this business. Not the performance itself or even, particularly, the drama, she just hated the gossip and the bitching.

Predictably, as Elizabeth walked in, the room fell silent and every head turned to look at her. Glancing about at them all, Karen strolled forward to her side with a bright smile and asked her to read lines with her. A look of gratitude flickered through the younger girl's eyes before she nodded. They walked over to the corner where they pulled up a couple of chairs and sat opposite one another with a script between them.

Everyone else in the room went back to their own conversations and Elizabeth sighed "I wondered about taking a sick day today but I couldn't stand the idea of being around my mother for a moment longer than is strictly necessary."

"Have you talked to her about it?" Karen asked, pointing at the script as though they were discussing a scene. It was a tactic to stop the rest of the cast from suspecting they were talking about anything worth listening to, something she'd picked up through years in the theatre.

Rubbing her ear nervously, the younger girl replied "Does a shouting match, when I got home from the party, count?"

"Not really," Karen tried not to laugh "I think you should really hear her out."

With a shrug, Elizabeth nodded "I will, but I think I have a right to be pissed off with her for a while."

Once again, the room fell silent. Quietly, Karen leant forward and, without even looking to check the cause of the sudden lull, told her companion "I'm going to check Derek's okay."

Like some sort of odd go-between, she hurried across the room to the director's side. Seeing his cast standing around, he barked "When did this become a mother's bloody meeting, I want to start in five minutes, if you're not warmed up then you work cold, move your bloody arses!"

Everyone scuttled to the bar or the piano like ants rushing from a falling stone. Still, Karen strolled towards him "Hey, are you okay?"

"I'm fine," he snapped with acid on his tongue. Then he seemed to realise he'd been too short and was about to apologize when a man strolled through the door behind him.

He was an just under an inch taller than Derek with sharp eyes like Derek's. His nose was slightly crooked and his hair a dusty grey. All the while his clothes could almost be seen as dapper, if a little worn around the edges. There was something eerily familiar about him though, as though Karen had met him in another life.

Hearing the movement behind him, Derek noticeably tensed up. The man raised his eyebrows and stepped to Derek's side "Where's my seat?"

"Reagan!" the director turned to the table where the creative team was sat "Would you get my father a bloody chair please?" As the poor woman scrambled around for a chair, Karen eyed, along with rest of the cast she was sure, the strange man who stood in their rehearsal studio like he owned it. Although, Karen thought she was probably the only one in the room that noticed how uncomfortable Derek was in the presence of this man he had referred to as his father. This discomfort was almost certainly the cause of his increased use of his favourite swear word.

From the desk, Eileen paced over. Icily, she smiled at the intruder "It's so nice to see you again, Charles, or should I say Sir Charles, now?"

"Please Eileen, I'll always be just Charles to my friends..." he paused for comic effect "So yes it's Sir Charles to you." Much fake laughter from all those gathered, ensued.

Seeming to regain a little confidence, Derek stepped forward from the group "Right, let's go from scene seven, act one and-"

"Derek, aren't you going to introduce me to... your people?" Charles asked, with a sickly sweet smile. Even with his perfect diction and carefully cultivated expression, there was something unnerving in the way he observed them all.

With a nervous glance around the cast, who were moving into their places, Derek pointed out "There are quite a lot of people to introduce."

"Just pick the most important ones then," his father replied plainly.

A frown clouded the director's expression "No-one in my cast is any more important than anyone else." Behind them, the cast eyed each other incredulously but all Karen felt was a warm sense of pride that spread through her veins. As much as no-one else believed him, she knew that he really meant that, they were all equal in his eyes. A bigger part earned you no more respect than it did leniency from Derek, they were all screamed at equally.

There was a staring stale-mate between the two Wills men until Ivy stood from her chair in the middle of the room and suggested "What if you introduce the people in each scene that we rehearse?"

"I suppose that works," Derek sighed in admission before pacing out in front of the performers and crying "Where's Karen?"

Suddenly, Karen realised that she was in scene seven and barely made it into her place, next to Elizabeth, before Derek began introducing them. He wandered round the little tableaux that began this scene, irritably, pointing "This is William Harvey, Bobby Morgan, Ivy Lynn,-" he paused to smile awkwardly at Karen "-Karen Cartwright and..." A look of determination came over Derek's face as his eyes rested on Elizabeth's face. Stopping, he glanced around at the cast watching him intently, looked back down at the teenager and offered her his hand. As she understood what he was doing, Elizabeth reached out, took it and he pulled her up to his side. Still holding her hand, Derek announced "And this is Elizabeth Mason, my daughter."

"Your what?" Charles blinked, leaning forward in his seat.

Without acknowledging his father's question, Derek gestured for Elizabeth to sit back down and continues "And the strange man who's invaded our rehearsal this morning is my father, Sir Charles Wills, now, let's get straight down to business. Let's go from William's line." Now Derek stepped into his element, not only was he doing what he loved but he'd put his father on the back foot. It was Derek who was in control in this situation, not Charles.

dddddd

Derek was glad he'd told his dad about Elizabeth in the way he had, even if he had a feeling he would have to pay for it later. To deal with the inevitable collateral damage, he formulated a plan as he directed the morning's scenes. When they broke for lunch, he paced over to Karen "Hey, will you come out to lunch with Lizzie, my dad and me, you know her better than I do and I could do with someone to keep me calm?"

"Sure, I'll go get Lizzie, if you get your Dad," she smiled gently before pacing over to rescue Elizabeth from a group of dancers who were interrogating her. Only just resisting the urge to watch her leave, he turned and met his father by the door.

In moments, Charles had hissed "When, in God's name, did you get a daughter?"

"A month or two ago," Derek shrugged, watching Karen pull Elizabeth from the crowd "That's when Kate told me she existed anyway."

Raising his eyebrows, the pompous man nodded "So Kate's her mother, good to know she'd not the product of one of your one night stands, I always thought you should have married that girl."

"And I've always thought you should keep your nose out of my relationships," Derek retorted, stepping forward to greet the two girls who'd just reached them "Ready to go?"

With a nervous smile, Elizabeth glanced at Karen beside her "As I'll ever be." The four of them walked out of the studio and wandered to a café frequented by members of the cast in their breaks. They talked about nothing, the show mainly and the girls told Charles about their past careers.

Then, once they'd got sat down, Charles eyed Derek and Karen "So, are you two a couple?"

"What? No!" Karen giggled "Derek and I are great friends but-"

"I'm trying to break the habit of sleeping with my actresses," Derek interjected, making everyone look his way. As much as he hated to admit it, he'd had to rethink just about everything since Elizabeth had turned up in his life. How could he prey on actresses when his daughter was one, his need to protect her had stopped him in his tracks.

Rolling her eyes, Elizabeth smirked "Besides, Karen could do better."

"Watch your mouth sweetheart," Derek mirrored her half-smile with his own "I'm still your director, you know."

Cheekily, she widened her eyes in challenge "But what would the cast say if you fired me now?"

"And how would we find another Anne as good as you?" Karen smiled across at the younger girl. A sudden rush of affection for the two girls at the table took Derek off guard. They almost felt like a family, which was odd because it got Derek thinking that, one day, they could be.

kkkkkk

Kate was waiting for Elizabeth when she got home from rehearsal. Wordlessly, she rose from her seat at the kitchen table and poured her daughter a mug of hot chocolate. Taking the mug, Elizabeth sighed "I met Charles Wills today, apparently he dropped in on Derek unexpectedly."

"Oh, Charles," Kate smiled fondly, remembering the days sitting through dinners between Derek and Charles "Are him and Derek still at odds?"

With a nod, the girl sat down at the table "Yeah, we all went out at lunch, I think Charles likes me."

"Yeah, I was a bit of a favourite of his too," Kate admitted, pouring herself a cup of coffee before sitting down opposite her daughter "That man may be gay as the forth of July but he gets on much better with women than men."

Eyes wide, Elizabeth breathed "He's gay!"

"Oh yeah, not that he nor Derek would ever admit it," her mother shrugged "He's your classic closet-case and responsible for the hints of homophobia Derek occasionally flashes."

Blinking, Elizabeth exhaled and nodded with understanding "I guess I get why Derek can be such a jerk sometimes now."

"He's had it really tough, over the years, you know?" Kate looked at her daughter through her eyelashes "That isn't an excuse for him, but I honestly think no-one knows him like I do and he's not a bad guy once you strip away all the defences he's had up since his parents split."

After a few moments of elongated silence, Elizabeth plucked up the courage to ask "Why didn't you tell me? All those years I nagged and nagged for the smallest titbit of information about my dad, would it have been so hard to tell me the truth?"

"Yes," the mother whispered, hands tightening around her coffee cup "The first few years, I was a child trying to get over my first love, it was too painful for me to talk about it. Then, you were all I had, I couldn't stand the idea of you running away to him and me losing you. Even once I got over that idea, he seemed so dark and dangerous, I didn't want to be anywhere near him and telling you would mean bringing him into our lives, I didn't know if my heart could take that. What we had between us ended badly, it wasn't a clean wound and it's healed in a jagged scar across my heart. I was scared it would re-open if I got too close to him."

"I guess I can't argue with that. I forgive you."

dddddd

As Derek closed the front door to his apartment behind them, he heard his father clear his throat. Turning, the younger man shook his head "Have you enjoyed your yearly intrusion into my life, Dad?"

"I'd appreciate it if you dropped the snark, Captain," Charles retorted, referring to the childhood games of soldiers he'd played with his brothers "Isn't a father allowed to take an interest in his son's life?"

Practically marching into the kitchen, Derek replied "Not when he forgets that his son exists three-hundred-and-sixty-four days a year."

"How is it you didn't call me when you found out about Elizabeth?" Charles changed the subject as he knew he couldn't win this argument "I could have given you advice, you're clearly out of your depth with her and I could have given you advice about being a father."

Reaching for the scotch, Derek snorted "Of course, because you were always the perfect father between shagging everything that moved and ignoring all four of us, constantly. What kid could want for more than a parent who let us believe for the majority of our childhood that you loved your pomeranian more than us? In fact I still believe that."

"She's a lovely girl," his father ignored the sarcasm.

With a chuckle, Derek half-smiled "I think she takes after Kate more than me."

"Every parent thinks that," Charles said dismissively "But I wasn't talking about the surprise grandchild, I was talking about the woman you're in love with."

Derek was so stunned he practically spat out his scotch "What?"

"Karen, wasn't it?" Charles raised his eyebrows, that man could not keep his brow still "If you don't marry her, you're an idiot."

Rubbing his temples, the director groaned "Why does it always come down to marriage with you?"

"She's sweet and kind, she'll be good for you," Charles continued as he picked up his suitcase and headed for the door "So get your finger out and do something about it because I've never seen you look at anyone the way look at her. Now, I'll get out of your hair, goodbye until another time."

A hint of sadness found itself into Derek's voice as he sighed "See you next year, Dad."


	13. The Decisions

At some point in every person's life, they have that moment when they look in the mirror and think: _today's the day_. This was Derek's moment. It was an early morning, New York's first snow of that winter was falling outside his window and he was watching the white flakes of ice drift past the lights of the city. As his gaze refocussed on his own reflection in the glass and he met his own steady gaze, he just knew. Today was the day he was going to tell her.

jjjjjj

There was something odd about Tom this morning. Over the years of friendship she had shared with him, Julia had gained a certain talent for reading Tom like a book. So she knew that something was bothering him that morning.

"All right, I'm heading out to meet Ivy before rehearsal," Sam smiled, grabbing his dance bag and pecking Tom on the cheek "Are you two staying in to write, today?"

With a nod, Julia replied "Yeah, Eileen wants us to look over a couple of things."

"Okay, well I might drop by for lunch," he winked before darting out the door "Have fun kids."

As soon as Sam was out the door, Julia pulled the binder of notes from her bag and asked "Okay Tom, what's on your mind?"

"You've been waiting to ask me that since you got here haven't you?" he sighed, standing up and pacing to the window to look through the kitchen blinds.

Smiling, she shrugged "I'm your best friend, it's my job to ask you the awkward questions."

"So that's why you're always so irritating," he commented, his eyes watching Sam walk off down the street.

Dryly, Julia chastised "You're stalling."

"How did Frank propose to you?" he asked, turning to her and leaning against the wall with his arms folded across his chest.

Stunned by his question, she blinked "Broadway show, dinner and then he gave this little speech about me always being better with words than he was, so he decided to use my words instead of his and then sung me the proposal song from _First Comes Love_, why?"

"I want to... I think it's about time..." Tom chuckled without humour "Damn it, Julia, this is why you write the words. I'm going to propose to Sam but I don't have the faintest clue how you're supposed to do something like that."

At the sight of her partner so flustered, her heart melted "If you just say that to him, he'll fall into your arms, trust me."

"You don't know him as well as I do, he's..." for the fiftieth time, he trailed off "He's amazing, Julia, he's much too good for me."

With a nod, Julia chuckled "Yeah, and right this minute he'll be telling Ivy that you're too good for him. You two really need your heads banging together, you're actually perfect for each other but the two of you refuse to see it. Even at the beginning when you were dating that republican, everyone else could see that you and Sam were perfect for each other and yet you continued to be infuriatingly oblivious to that."

"You really think we're perfect for each other?" Tom rubbed the back of his neck, smiling like a teenager falling in love for the first time.

Smiling, she stood up, cradling the binder of show notes in her arms "Yes. So today, you and I are going to write the finale that Eileen was, eat lunch and then plan what you're going to say to Sam, okay?"

"You're an angel, do you know that?" he took the binder from her and pecked her on the cheek before making his way over to the piano.

As she followed him, she chuckled "No, I'm just your best friend."

dddddd

_Breathe Derek, breathe,_ he told himself as he walked into the rehearsal studio early to find the cast gathered before him. Without even looking, he knew Karen wasn't there, it was like the air pressure changed when she walked into the room. However, a fleeting glance around those warming up told him that neither Ivy or Elizabeth were present either. That was odd, usually at least one of them would be here by now. As well as this the creative team was entirely absent aside from him.

"All right everyone, let's run the opening," Derek called, quickly working his schedule for the day around the late arrival of his leads. None of the Brontë sisters were needed for the first four scenes because these covered their childhood when the child actors played the sisters. Therefore he could probably survive the full morning without them but he really hoped they'd arrive soon.

After all, he did really want to talk to Karen today. In fact, he felt as though he may die on the spot if he didn't get all of the emotions coursing through his veins out in the air. She needed to hear what he had to say. She needed to hear how he felt about her.

However, as he finished the work on the very first scene, none of the three had arrived. Derek was beginning to feel anxious. Not only were his plans to talk to Karen over lunch falling apart with each tick of the clock but his daughter was missing. If anything had happened to either of those girls, Derek didn't think he'd be able to survive. These were the two people who mattered most in Derek's life, the lights that lit up his world. A world of darkness isn't worth living in, he should know, he'd lived there almost his entire life.

"Take five everybody," Derek told them as they finished running the scene one last time. As he returned to his notes and checked the clock, he frowned. It was only an hour until lunch and they still hadn't arrived. Looking across at Reagan he asked "Do you know where Karen and Elizabeth are?"

Reagan jumped as he spoke to her, he rarely talked to her unless he had to, so she was mildly nervous of his seemingly friendly tone "Eileen's taking them round some department stores to sing and publicise the show."

"For the whole day?" his stomach turned with disappointment as Reagan nodded silently. Irritably, he rubbed his temples and groaned "What is it that stops her from warning me when she's going to do something like this?" Still cautious of his unprecedented communication with her, she shrugged non-committally before scurrying over to a batch of dancers she often spoke to.

Sighing, Derek wondered why his employees hated him. Then he realised that it was probably because he was a perfectionist and kept them working until they got it right. Which brought him back to reality and prompted him to call the cast back for scene two.

kkkkkk

It was odd not to be in the rehearsal studio. Karen felt uncomfortable, out of her comfort zone, away from her colleagues. A small voice in her head chirped that she was also away from Derek but she ignored that.

The three of them were waiting behind a make-shift stage in the middle of Bloomingdales. Ivy was split off from the two of them, talking animately on a mobile and Karen was stood with Elizabeth. Surprisingly it seemed that the youngest Brontë was most comfortable with their whirlwind tour round the major department stores of New York. Then again, Karen knew that many musicals did this for publicity and it wouldn't surprise her if Elizabeth had done this before.

"Karen, can I ask you something?" the younger girl asked.

Blinking out of her thoughts, Karen nodded "Sure."

"What would you do if you had a boyfriend, who was loving and amazing and so much better than you but you thought you were falling for, or at least had an attraction to someone else who was talented and infuriating and so hot and you don't want to hurt either but you kind of want both?" Elizabeth looked up at the older actress through her eyelashes.

Suddenly, Karen flashed back to standing in that apartment the night Derek had told her that he needed to see everything she had. All the things that had run through her head. Thinking about loyalty to Dev but her strange attraction to Derek was intoxicating. Then there was the fact that it was just sex, all it was was a casting couch hook-up. So, she chose a stable relationship with a guy who cheated on her.

Looking back, would things have been different if she'd been the first to cheat? She knew she'd made the right decision, to be the better person and she was sure that Derek thought more of her for what she'd done but wasn't it Derek who was there for her when Dev cheated. Maybe the first time he came onto her, she made the right decision; what about the second time? Then, she wasn't so sure. Getting to know Derek, it seemed more and more likely to Karen that he had been looking for more than a hook-up with an actress. Sometimes Derek alienated people because he wasn't great at getting his emotions across and it often sounded as though he was being arrogant or inappropriate.

What if that night hadn't been just a come on? What if he was looking for the relationship she had wanted from him? What if she could be the girl he settled down for, the one he didn't fling aside after some short months of casual sex? What if he could love her the way he'd loved Kate? And what if she could love – no she couldn't let herself open that door, it would lead to nothing but heartbreak. Whatever she had with Derek right now was great and she had to keep any girlish unrealistic feelings out of the equation.

"Karen?" Elizabeth prompted.

Realising she'd just zoned out for around five minutes, the words flowed out of Karen's mouth before she could even think about them "I hate to quote Johnny Depp but 'if you love two people at the same time, choose the second. Because if you really loved the first one, you wouldn't have fallen for the second.'"

"Girls," Eileen smiled as she came off from introducing them "You're on."

dddddd

Today hadn't gone how Derek had planned it.

At all.

That was okay though, because Derek was determined to tell her today and when Derek was determined to do something, he did it. So, once he'd freshened up a bit, he was going to go over to her apartment and tell her there.

So he made for the door but, when he was a step away, there was a series of quick and nervous knocks. Sighing, and hoping it would be a quick encounter, Derek swung open the door.

Head down, Elizabeth skirted past him and into the apartment "Mum thinks I'm over at Harry's, I don't generally make a habit of lying to her but I needed to talk to someone completely impartial and you were the only person I could think of."

Part of Derek almost considered doing what his own Dad would have done in this situation, kick her out on her behind and tell her to work it out for herself. As soon as he'd found out about Elizabeth, however, he'd known that he could not be like his own father. Nothing was going to make him mess up this perfect little girl the way his own Dad had screwed him up.

"Can I talk to you, Dad?"

Had she just called him Dad? That was so odd, it made him feel warm inside. Someone needed him, not for sex or for a job or even for money, all she wanted was for him to be there. What was it about this girl that was pure unconditional love. Nodding dumbly, he gestured for her to go through to the living room and shut the door quietly.

"So," he followed her through and sat down next to her on the sofa "What did you want to talk about?"

Nervously, she chewed her bottom lip for a moment before admitting "I really like Charlie."

"What?" Derek blinked and, immediately started babbling "He's way too old for you and is a bit of a player, more than a few dancers are falling over themselves to sleep with him. I don't trust him any further than as an employee and you shouldn't trust him any further than as a co-worker."

With a sigh, she groaned "But there is something there and I can't shake the feeling that I should really explore that."

"Please, that boy would have chemistry with a cabbage," he rolled his eyes, a new argument popping into his head "Anyway, didn't Karen say you had a boyfriend?"

As he said it, Elizabeth dropped her eyes to her fidgeting hands "That's the problem, I really love Harry but it feels dishonest to carry on with him when I like Charlie, at the same. Then again, I don't want to break up with Harry for Charlie if there really is nothing there and this thing with Charlie is just a passing fancy that I'll get over. I asked Karen about it but I wasn't specific and her answer was a little general. I don't know what to do."

"You want my advice?" Derek couldn't quite believe that anyone was asking him for relationship advice. When she nodded with her feline amber eyes wide and innocent, he continued "I'm not good at relationships, but leaving your mother, the way I did, was the worst thing I've ever done. Think really carefully before you end something really special."

Blinking, she seemed to truly realise something "Thanks Dad, I think I know what I'm going to do now, I'm going to go and see Harry." Somehow, Derek knew he didn't need to show her out, he just sat while she paced out the door in exactly the same way Kate would have.

That got him thinking. He loved Karen but, given the chance, would he go back to Kate? Five years ago he would have said yes in a heartbeat and he knew that something inside him still loved her. However, he could feel that feeling in his very core that told him that Karen was different.

With a renewed sense of determination, Derek stood and headed for the exit. Just as he did so, there was yet another knock at the door.

ssssss

"Ivy, where are we going?" Sam asked as she led him down a street he vaguely recognised. His hands were half-frozen in the icy winter weather and his feet were going numb but he still trooped after Ivy, who claimed there was a new coffee shop that she just had to take him to. The more he followed, the less he believed her.

Finally, the blonde pulled open a door and held it open for him "Here we are, ladies first."

"Very funny, barbie," he rolled his eyes, stepping in only to hear the door slam shut behind him with no Ivy at his side. Fear struck him as his body began to thaw and he glanced about the dark hall nervously. It was soundless and he was blind in the dark of the unlit corridor.

Then, he heard the distinct and familiar trill of a piano. The same short bar of melody over and over again. Hoping for a sign of another human, he followed the sound into an empty room. It was lit by wall-lights and the only furniture was a grand piano and stool. Sat on the stool was Tom and, as soon as Sam entered the room, he began to sing "_Marry me a little, _

_Love me just enough. _

_Cry, but not too often, _

_Play, but not too rough._" Sam's breath caught in his throat, he couldn't be serious "_Keep a tender distance, _

_so we'll both be free. _

_That's the way it ought to be._" As though he knew what Sam was thinking Tom looked up at him for the first time as he declared "_I'm ready!_" Now he never looked away, gold-flecked eyes focussed on Sam's as he continued "_Marry me a little..._"

Never had Sam loved this man more.

kkkkkk

It seemed silly to her now, why was it that Derek was the only person he could think of to take her in. Yes her apartment building had flooded but there had to be someone else who she could stay with. How did Karen even know Derek would take her in?

To be honest, the look on Derek's face as he opened the door was priceless. It switched from irritated to surprised in a matter of moments. His eyes were wide and his mouth hung open as Karen told him "My apartment building flooded and you were the first person I could think of to stay with."

"I was?"

"Yeah, so can I come in?"


	14. Firsts

"Of course, anything for my leading lady," that was a stupid thing to say, it was exactly like what he'd said to drive her away from Bombshell. What was it about Karen that made him say stupid things like that? Stupid! Stupid! Stupid!

Smiling curiously at him, she paced in and dropped her suitcase by the door "Technically, I'm not your leading lady, Ivy is, but, as long as I have a place to stay, I don't really care."

Derek closed the door behind her and leant on the wood, staring at her in wonder. He supposed that this little coincidence saved him the drive over to her apartment but he'd planned on using that time to better construct what he wanted to say. How did you tell someone that you were utterly and completely in love with them?

"I'm not interrupting anything am I?" Karen asked as she observed the stunned look on Derek's face.

Realising that his guest was still lingering in the hallway, waiting for him to say something, the director shook his head "No, I... you're the second unexpected visitor I've had tonight."

"Let me guess," she smiled teasingly, in an attempt to break the tension she didn't understand "It was Alice Ripley begging for my part."

With a shaky smirk, he led the way through to the living room "No, it was Lizzie and, even if she was begging to play Emily, she's too old and couldn't play it as well as you can."

"She's won a Toni," Karen pointed out "For playing a mad housewife, she'd be great for Emily."

He gestured for her to sit down and quirked an eyebrow "Mark my words, when this show hits Broadway, you'll have to clear a shelf for all of the awards you'll get."

"So will you, Mr Director, this show was nothing before you got your hands on it," she giggled at the memory and sat down on the leather sofa "You should have seen Morgan Hallaway's direction, you would have killed yourself laughing."

Carefully, he sat down next to her "Eileen said it was pretty atrocious." Derek felt like his stomach was imploding with nerves, plaiting and knotting itself, begging for any sort of release. It would drive a weaker man insane.

"You wouldn't have believed it," she smiled and he thought he might just fall into her arms right then and there. She was like an angel, the way the city lights through the window picked out the red in her hair and made those chocolate eyes glitter.

Before he could really think about it, Derek found words tumbling from his mouth "Karen, I just wanted to say that, when you left Bombshell, what I said that night-"

"You don't need to explain yourself to me," the actress swept a stray hair behind her ear, trying to hide how awkward it was for her to talk about "You've already apologized."

For a moment, he sensed her unease and hesitated. Then he decided it was now or never "But, the thing was, I wasn't looking for sex that night, not really, I was looking for... I wanted to start something with you, a real relationship."

"I wanted that too," Karen told him, her eyes dropping to her hands in her lap "Back then."

Breath hitching slightly in his throat, he asked in little more than a whisper "What about now?"

"Now I-" she stopped short and blinked, as if she'd just remembered something. In a rush, she stood up "Now I'd like to get some rest, where's my room?"

Stunned, it took him a moment to realise what she meant. He scrambled to his feet and rushed to grab her bag and carry it upstairs for her as he led her to her room. With each step the silence broke another piece of his heart. He'd opened his soul to Karen and all she'd done was throw it back in his face.

As they reached the door, Derek passed her the bag but couldn't muster the strength to look her in the eye. Gratefully, she-half smiled, nodded and disappeared into the room. Once the door was closed, Derek fell back against the wall, feeling like his world was coming down around him. He slid to the floor. This was not what he was expecting, he wasn't sure what he was expecting but seeing his heart crushed into the carpet was not it. How could this happen to him?

What he couldn't see was Karen pacing back and forth by the bed, tugging at her hair and cursing her conscience. What he couldn't see was her press a longing hand on the cool flat of the door. What he couldn't see was Karen deciding her conscience could go to hell and take her with it.

Then, his gaze was drawn to the twitch of the door handle. Slowly, not quite daring to hope, he climbed back to his feet. His eyes never left the door, heart thumping louder than he'd ever heard it before.

Inch by inch, the door opened and Karen stepped out. In a moment she closed it behind her and leant tensely back on it as though it might open and swallow her up whole. She searched his vulnerable gaze, allowing for just a moment of self doubt before she lunged forward and captured his lips with hers.

Curling his arms around her he stumbled back so his back was pressed against the cool of the wall and his body burning with emotions he couldn't quite identify. Then he kissed back, regaining enough of his own control to be able to twist his fingers in her hair.

All too soon, she pulled away, pausing a moment to rest her hand on his face. Leaving a peck on his cheek, Karen slipped back into her room.

Needless to say, Derek's head was spinning.

tttttt

Tom finished the song and sat with baited breath. Nervously, he took the little velvet box from his pocket, set it on the flat surface of the top of the piano and breathed "I'm ready, Sam, marry me?"

"How did you arrange this?" he shook his head, glancing over his shoulder for signs of any more surprises.

Resisting the urge to push Sam for an answer, Tom admitted "Julia got me this place and I got Ivy to bring you here, I'm only responsible for the song choice."

"And you really mean it?" he asked, searching Tom's blue eyes for just the slightest sliver of doubt. This had to be too good to be true.

With a sigh, Tom left the safety of his piano and came round to take the dancer's hand "Marriage scares me, I'm not going to deny that, but a life with you, that's not scary at all. In fact, I don't think I've ever wanted anything more. You make me feel like bursting into song every time I see you and I don't want to carry on without that song in my heart."

"Me neither," Sam grinned, chuckling slightly "I was so scared you'd bolt if I pulled out a ring that I never even considered what I'd say if you proposed to me but, the thing is, I don't have to consider it. Of course it's yes, it's always been yes."

And then they kissed.

Within seconds, Ivy and Julia were through the door. Eyes bright and shining as they waited for the boys to respond, they seemed practically buzzing with anticipation. Both of them knew it would be a yes, but they still wanted to hear it from the two of them.

As he pulled out of the kiss, Tom leant his forehead against Sam's and mouthed a quick _I love you_. A smile gracing his lips, Sam winked and mirrored the gesture. Then they both turned to face their friends. They only kept the two women in suspense for a few moments before Tom revealed "It's a yes."

"We knew it!" Ivy squealed, leaping on them both and wrapping her arms around their necks "We knew you two were going to work out."

With a chuckle, Julia met Tom's eyes over the blonde's shoulder "They've got a long way to go yet, before they've _worked out_, but I think you two might just do it anyway. Congratulations."

"Thanks," Tom nodded at his partner, then pulled Sam towards the door "Now let's go back to our house for a late supper.

hhhhhh

Strumming some chords on a guitar, Harry was sat up in his room. It had often occurred to him that his room would seem odd for a teenage boy. It was pasted in posters but they weren't for bands or movies, they were for Broadway shows. All of the ones Elizabeth had been in, as a matter of fact and other personal favourites. Then there was the bookshelf crammed to the bursting with a wild variety of books. A small television was set up in the corner with a games console and a DVD player but the films stacked underneath it were a mix of musicals, screw-ball comedies and action films.

"Harry, Elizabeth is here!" his Mum called and he was sprinting out to meet her.

Sure enough, there she was, practically shimmering like the star she was. After all this time, she could still stop his heart with one glance. This girl had him wrapped around her finger and he didn't think that she even knew it.

Smiling nervously, she looked up at him through her lashes and it took Harry a moment to regain his senses enough to invite her up to his room. With a quirk of her eyebrow, his mother commented "Don't have too much fun up there."

"Mom!" he groaned and took Elizabeth's hand, pulling her upstairs. He rushed around, tidying up a little before settling down on the bed with a smile "How were rehearsals today?"

Slowly, she sat down beside him "Actually, I wasn't in rehearsals today, Eileen took us out for publicity."

"Eileen?" he groped around in his head to place the name.

As she realised his confusion, she explained "Our producer, anyway, it gave me some time to think."

"That's good," he beamed, failing to read the subtext "Everyone needs some time to think things through, once in a while. Plus, you've had a lot going on over the last few months, what with your Dad turning up and the show and-"

"Harry, we need to talk," Elizabeth interrupted him and stopped him dead. There was something in her face he'd never seen before, a sadness. It was heart-wrenching and terrifying at the same time, what could make his girl so irrevocably mournful.

Trying to keep the fear out of his voice, he commented "Aren't we talking already?"

"Yes but..." she trailed off and closed her eyes as she tried to muster the strength to say what she had to "I kissed Charlie."

It took Harry a moment to process that, he stared at her blankly for a few moments and then blinked "You kissed-"

"And it set me thinking about you and I," she continued and tried to ignore the hurt that was written across his very being "And that we've never been with anyone else and maybe I should explore the feelings I have for Charlie."

Once again, it took him awhile before the words registered in his head. It was as though his head was trying to protect him from the emotional onslaught that was about to wrack his body. Eventually though, it did hit him and the pain twisted his innards into knots and ripped his heart free of his chest as he choked "You're breaking up with me."

"I'm sorry Harry," she leant across, kissed his forehead and then left without looking back. It was just as she'd planned it, quick and then out of his life. She figured that it would be easier for him this way. Still, when she thought about it later, it was easier for her too, not having to see the stunned hurt and betrayal in his expression.

kkkkkk

Karen had got up early that morning, after a restless night in Derek's guest room. When thoughts are too wild to tame, sleep is hard to come by and she couldn't let her mind rest. Now she was leaning on the counter in the kitchen, coffee in hand, trying to organise her thoughts.

So there might be something here with Derek. Could she trust him though? She'd seen the girls that Derek had dated, seen how he cast them off. If her previous relationships had taught her anything it was that she fell way too fast for her own good. That was a dangerous thing to do with Derek. For weeks she'd been trying to ignore the feelings that stirred inside her whenever they were close, because she'd thought that they were foolish and too risky. Now he was offering her to come closer than he'd ever let anyone come and it was tempting. More than tempting in fact.

She was also aware that, if it ended badly, it could potentially damage her career. People wouldn't just start saying that she'd slept with the director to get the part (ridiculous considering Derek joined the production after her) but that she was another one of the stupid girls who fell for Derek Wills and thought that he'd change for them. People didn't change for others, it just didn't work.

"Hey."

Spinning round, her eyes landed on Derek stood watching her. He wasn't even dressed yet, just in sweat pants and a faded band t-shirt. It was so candid, so open and vulnerable. All of her misgivings just about vanished from her mind at the mere sight of him.

Still, she just stood staring at him like a deer in the headlights for a few seconds before she got up the courage to say "I don't know if I can trust you."

"And I don't know how to do relationships," he admitted, taking a few hesitant steps towards her "I haven't actually had one since I was eighteen but you and I, we're good for each other." Realising that he was very nearly quoting his Dad, he sighed and rubbed the back of his neck "I understand if you want to take it slow, hell, I understand if you don't want to touch me with a bloody barge pole, but just give us this one chance. Please."

She was more than aware that her heart was too far gone to reject him now. Just the flustered way in which he begged for a chance was enough to break even the strongest of resolutions, and Karen's wasn't very strong to start with.

Her breath shook as she began to set down her terms "We have to have complete exclusivity."

"You already have exclusivity," he smirked sort of bashfully and rubbed the back of his neck "There haven't been any women since I started working on Brontë, not since I saw you again."

Frowning, she continued "And you can't treat me any different in rehearsals, I won't have them saying you're going soft on me."

"I'll try, but I already think I'm nicer to you than anyone else in the cast," Derek smiled softly.

Before she could consider her words, she chuckled "If that's what you call being nice, I dread to think what you'll be like when you're really mean." There was an awkward pause but, as soon as their eyes met, both of them burst out laughing.

The mood was broken in an instant and they found themselves stumbling towards each other as their lips met in a clumsy kiss. As her arms snaked round his neck, Karen wondered how this electric happiness could possibly be wrong.


	15. Gossip

"So you've broken up with him then?" Charlie asked as Elizabeth and him walked into a little coffee shop they both frequented.

Solemnly, she shook the snow from her clothes and nodded "Yeah, as of last night, anyway."

"Am I allowed to ask why?" he cocked his head to one side, curiously, before going up to the counter to put in their order.

With a mysterious sort of smile, she said "Maybe, I had feelings for someone else."

"Oh really," he leant on the counter and raised an eyebrow at her, flirtatiously "Tell me about this mystery guy."

Even though she was aware, by the gentle sparkle behind his eyes, that he was only teasing her, Elizabeth played along anyway "Well, he's in the Brontë, and he's a small-part actor who's a little bit of a golden boy."

"Hm, golden boy," he reached, carefully, for her hand, smirking a little, as he did so "I'm not so sure about that."

Her breath came out shaky, as she told him "Don't get any ideas, you're not the centre of my universe, you know?"

"Well, I just might have to change that," he leant in closer, his lips just inches from hers when he stopped short at the sound of a voice.

"Lizzie?" Harry stood awkwardly in the doorway, eyes wide and voice broken. Turning to him, Elizabeth's heart nearly broke at the sight. His eyes were red and sore. His face was pale. It didn't look as if he'd brushed his hair that morning. He was a mess and she couldn't shake the feeling it was all her fault.

She didn't know what to say, she'd hoped to just step out of his life, never see him again. Now here she was, faced with exactly what she'd done and all she could do was hold tighter onto Charlie's hand.

Seeing her distress, Charlie stepped in front of her "Harry isn't it?"

"Yeah," he nodded curtly, anger beginning to brew beneath the miserable exterior "It's Harry, the recently ex-boyfriend who didn't quite expect her to move on quite so fast."

With a roll of his eyes, Charlie retorted "Moving on has nothing to do with it."

"It has everything to do with it," Harry spat, eyes blazing "We've been together for almost three years, she's my best friend and we know everything about each other. That doesn't just change over night."

Just for a moment, Charlie's eyes darted up to the door as Ivy wandered in for her morning coffee. In less than a minute, he was squaring up the younger boy and raising his voice "I don't really see how it's any of your business if she's with me, I like her, she likes me and we happen to be a bit more than friends. If you have a problem with that, I suggest I take it up with your puppy-dog heart and leave us be." Then, rather dramatically, Charlie grabbed their coffee order and led Elizabeth from the shop. Once the cool air had cleared her head, she felt even more guilty than she had before.

kkkkkk

It was odd, walking to rehearsal, hand in hand with Derek. The snow drifted down around them, the air was biting cold but Karen felt flushed and warm. She could feel him tense beside her but she knew he was new to this so it sort of figured that he'd be a little uncomfortable at first. So she had to be the one in control, who knew what to do but what if she didn't know how to love this man.

Spotting one of the chorus on the other side of the street, Karen bolted, pulling Derek down and alley with her. As he got his footing again, Derek glanced around for some sort of threat he hadn't noticed. Slowly, Karen watched her cast-mate wander past "I think she's gone."

"Karen Cartwright," he leant on his back foot and folded his arms, a slight teasing sparkle in his eyes "Are you ashamed of me?"

Eyes widening slightly, she shook her head "No, no, no, of course not, it's just that I... I'm scared of what people are going to say." As she finished, talking she looked up at him through her eyelashes, sheepishly.

"Darlin'," he moved forward, smirk growing slightly "No-one's opinion matters except the opinions of those you love and sometimes even those opinions don't count. You have to go with your gut instinct, no point doubting that, it'll get you nowhere. Sometimes you'll be right and sometimes you'll be wrong but if you run on that instinct, you'll be happy and that's all that really matters."

With a quirk of her eyebrow, Karen asked "Isn't that a little hypocritical, I don't know if I've ever seen you truly happy."

"Truthfully, I haven't been, in a long time," he reached up to run his thumb over her cheek "But that's because I betrayed that first gut instinct not to come to New York but stay with a girl I didn't know was the mother of a little girl who wasn't born yet, my daughter. I've regretted that for eighteen years. I ignored my instinct in anything that didn't involve work. Then this fresh-faced little actress strolled into an audition looking as green as central park in summer and made me feel again. Maybe it took me awhile to listen to my gut again, but I tuned in and I took a chance on you. So far, it feels pretty wonderful." She took a few moments to stare at him in complete awe. Inexperienced, as he was in relationships, he took her awe for worry and backtracked "But if you don't want people to know I'm happy to-"

"No," Karen interrupted, walking into his embrace "You're right, of course you're right, let's go face the music."

Wrapping his arm around her waist, he led her back onto the street and they walked back out onto the street "You know, this is Broadway, there'll be at least two other scandals around to take their minds off of us."

iiiiii

Ivy Lynn was having a bad day. It was the worst kind of bad day because everyone else in the world seemed to be on cloud nine. As much as she was happy for Sam and Tom, an engagement was a bit of a kick in the gut when you've let the boy you love go because you're no good for him. So, after a night of celebrating someone else's happiness, you wake up alone and feel so cold inside. Today was not a good day.

Still, she'd hopped out of bed and hoped for the best. In fact, she had regained a great deal of happiness and optimism walking through the winter wonderland that New York had become. If only she hadn't walked into that coffee to shop to see the boy who had her heart twisted round his fingers stood with another girl while arguing for said girl's honour. Wasn't that just a sucker-punch?

Now she'd made it to rehearsals and everyone was sickeningly happy. Even those that weren't gushing over Sam or Tom seemed happy enough to give her a headache.

Then Charlie and Elizabeth walked in. His arm was draped over her shoulder and both of them were beaming like idiots. It made her feel like she wanted to baulk, why was it all of her boyfriends found girls who made her feel inadequate? Of course she had actually directed Charlie towards this one but that didn't make her feel any better about it.

Before she could stop herself, emotion had driven her to stand firm and shout "Isn't she a little young for you, Charlie?"

"Aren't you a little old to be intruding on Charlie's personal life?" Elizabeth stepped forward moodily, without knowing the burnt-out heart she was prodding.

Icily, Ivy hissed "Aren't you a little young to be sleeping around, miss holier than thou? I've seen a lot of girls like you and giving it up to your co-stars only gets you so far, if you really want to get somewhere in this business you need to sleep with the director, but I guess your mother already did that for you."

"Shut up, Ivy," Charlie put a steady hand on the arm of, the now infuriated, Elizabeth "You may have to sleep with directors to get parts but Lizzie's better than that."

Rolling her blue eyes, she retorted "Every young actress claims to be 'better than that' until they've spent a few months out of work, then you'll do anything to get the part and so what if that means doing something you're not necessarily proud of?"

"And look where that's gotten you," he threaded his fingers through Elizabeth's, but stared deep into Ivy's eyes "You're broken and all this scratching and clawing only shows you up to being someone wholly insecure and troubled."

With a start, the blonde realised that she'd shown too much of herself in front of a whole cast of people she'd rather didn't know all her weaknesses. In desperation, she snapped "What would you know about it?"

"More than you think," he responded.

Then the doors to the rehearsal room swung open and Derek paced in with Karen in toe. Everyone turned from Charlie and Ivy to the director and actress coming in together.

Indignantly, Derek cried "What is wrong with you lot, I'm five minutes late and you have all descended into chaos. Eileen is currently in Philadelphia setting everything up for our out-of-town try-outs next week, so we better step up our game and make sure we do her proud. So let's do a full run-through, places!"

No-one had a chance to make any assumptions or think much at all, in fact. They all just scuttled to their places and jumped straight in. Standing at the side, Ivy leant on the wall to feel the cool of the painted wall-paper on her back. Once she could see clear again, she regretted losing it and wished she could reign in her shattered heart.

kkkkkk

Eyes sparkling, Karen sat beside Charlie as they waited for their cues "So, you and Elizabeth."

"So, you and Derek?" he countered.

Quietly, Karen chuckled "Touché, but isn't she a little young for you?"

"Age is just a number," he shrugged, watching Ivy and Elizabeth act out some of the final scenes of the show "I like her, that's all that really matters. I'm sure, at some point today, you've had to tell some well-meaning nay-sayer where to go when they told you to shake off Derek."

Before he could finish, she interceded "Yeah, Tom listed off to me all of Derek's vices and told me I could do better than him, I told him that it didn't matter because-"

"All that really matters is how you feel together," Charlie smiled, watching the two girls "I've ruined relationships because I couldn't get past what other people thought, I'm not going to do that to this girl." And no-one noticed that it wasn't Elizabeth that his eyes followed when the two actresses split into opposite directions. No-one except Derek, that is.


	16. Hotel Rooms

Karen had never liked flying. All she could ever think about was the hundreds of disaster movies where planes plummeted to the ground at high speed. Somehow though, the surreal fact that she was currently sat on a plane holding Derek's hand in a vice-like grip was enough to make her feel safe. There was a hint of worry in his eyes as he sat beside her with Elizabeth on the other side of him "I don't remember you being this panicked when we went to Chicago for Bombshell."

"That's because you were at the other side of the plane," she smiled shakily before running a hand through her hair "When are we taking off?"

Gently, he squeezed his, now numb, hand "Relax, darlin', it's more dangerous to cross the road than to ride a plane."

"I'm never crossing the street ever again," she shook her head, with eyes wide and Derek had to resist the urge to laugh.

Clicking her seatbelt into place, Elizabeth glanced around "I don't see why you wouldn't let me sit next to Charlie, you'd just have to put up with Becca and she's not that bad."

"Because, Elizabeth, Kate has entrusted me as your chaperone and I'm not going to let her down by having you hang off that boy's arm the whole time," he scolded, eyeing Charlie across the plane.

With a groan, she pouted "Who knew having a dad could be this annoying?"

"You don't know the half of it, kid," Derek joked, before feeling a shooting pain in his hand telling him that they were about to take off. As he turned back to Karen, he smiled sympathetically "How many times have you flown in your life, Karen?"

Anxiously, she answered "I don't know, twenty maybe?"

"And, in those twenty flights, have you ever had any trouble whatsoever?" he asked, staring earnestly into her eyes. Karen had to gasp a little at the searching way he seemed to see right through her and could do nothing but shake her head in response. Slowly, he smiled "Exactly, so what makes you think this flight is going to be any different."

Squirming in her seat, she half-shouted "Logic has absolutely nothing to do with it, Derek!"

"Okay, what's your favourite musical?" he closed his eyes, as his mind worked over calming strategies.

Hysterically, she asked "What does that have to do with anything?"

"Just tell me," he gave her that searching look again, eyes wide open and eyebrows slightly raised.

So she took a deep breath and started talking. Musicals, movies, books, plays, television shows, all were tossed over in conversation between Karen and Derek with Elizabeth joining them now and then. They just kept talking and Karen forgot that they were thousands of feet in the air, she even forgot to watch the time tick slowly towards them landing.

"Karen," he stopped her mid-sentence and smiled "We've just landed in Philadelphia."

Blinking, she looked around the plane at the people standing to go "Oh my God, you just got me through a forty-five minute plane journey without me even thinking about it."

"And now we can go and make some magic," he stood up and pulled her up by her hand as the cast all piled out into the airport.

tttttt

Tom stood in the theatre where previews would take place. Sat on one of the chairs in the auditorium, Julia sighed "Do you think they'll like it?"

"I haven't spoken to anyone who's seen it who didn't," he shrugged, jamming his hands into his pocket "Why does this show feel like it's the first show we've ever done, like we haven't done anything like this before."

Turning to him, she replied "Because this is better than anything we've ever done before, only Bombshell comes close, everything about it is just right."

"Then what are we so afraid of?" he asked, walking over to sit next to her and staring at the empty stage.

Intimately, she laid her head on his shoulder "The fact that Catch Me If You Can was a brilliant show but sunk without trace or that a million other shows that should have done amazingly but ran only a few months."

"It's a strange business," he nodded, kissing the top of her head. They stayed sat like that for a few minutes, until Tom remembered "Eileen's having you completely rework the book, isn't she?"

With a resigned groan, she buried her head into his jacket "God give me patience, I'm going to be locked in my hotel room until we get back to New York at this rate, she just won't let up until every kink is ironed out."

"That, my flustered partner, is what makes her the best producer on Broadway," he grinned at how stressed she was, it was almost amusing.

Slapping his arm, Julia chastised "You don't have to deal with her, she always leaves your tunes alone, it's me that's constantly rewriting everything under the sun!"

"Okay, okay, I'll make you a deal," he half-smiled cheekily "Because you have to put up with Eileen's constant need for rewrites, I will deal with Derek any time either of us have an issue."

"That sounds fair."

dddddd

Derek had made sure him and Elizabeth had a two-bedroom suite for their stay in Philadelphia. It was a big deal for him that Kate had trusted him to be Elizabeth's chaperone and he intended to keep her close and Charlie at arm's length. Already she was in her room getting unpacked and Derek was sat on the settee with his script in his hand trying to figure out which scenes to run first in tech rehearsal at the theatre the following day.

Then there was a knock at the door. Laying the script aside, he got to his feet and opened it. There was Karen, stood looking up at him through her eyelashes and smiling slightly "Howdy, stranger."

"Hey," he smiled back at her and pressed his lips to hers for a second before moving aside to let her past "What brings you to our humble abode?"

Turning back to him, she shrugged "Just wanted to see your room, and get away from the girls arguing in mine."

"Who are you rooming with, again?" Derek closed the door and drifted towards her.

She counted each off on her fingers as she listed "Ivy, Becca and Jessie."

"Of course, you four are the top four girls on the cast list, right?" he nodded, remembering the discussion he'd had with Eileen about the room arrangements "Or at least the girls with the smallest number of parts, the other small-part girls are all in the same room and then the chorus girls are in a room together, the same principle applies to the boys rooms, the only exception is Elizabeth rooming with me."

With an ironic chuckle, Karen quipped "Thank you for that lesson on room arrangements, the point is that Becca and Ivy are at odds because she reckons Ivy purposely had Debbie run over so that she could get the part, Jessie's so scared to speak up because she got the part Ivy used to have that she's no use and, though I've tried, I can't stop the two of them fighting. So please thank Eileen for the splendid room arrangements, the two of you have a very clear idea of who gets on with who."

"I don't appreciate the sarcasm darlin', the creative team's job is not to observe the social rifts of the cast," he joked, stepping forward and pulling him towards her.

Pouting up at him, she replied "Well it's not my job either by I can't help but notice these things."

"But you're in the cast, you get involved, I have to stay distant so that the cast respects me," Derek explained, gently stroking a loose lock of hair behind her ear.

Cheekily, she bit her lip and half-chuckled "This staying distant, is sleeping with your actresses part or not part of that?"

"Hey," he couldn't help but grin at the way she teased him "I'll have you know that I have _yet_ to sleep with any of my actresses since I started work on Brontë."

She blinked, mumbling "Yet?"

"Anyway," he carried on as if she'd not said anything and didn't think to pause at the mildly spooked expression on her face "If you hate your room too much, why don't you come over and stay with Elizabeth and I?"

With a shaky smile, she backed away "No, I'll be okay, thanks Derek and I really should go, I promised to read lines with Ivy."

"You reading lines with Ivy?" he laughed, following her to the door "Are you feeling okay, sweetheart?" She was gone before she could answer and he frowned in confusion.

As he began to wonder what he'd said, his daughter emerged from her room with an eyebrow raised and her arms folded "You've scared her."

"What?" he turned to see Elizabeth looking just like Kate.

Shaking her head, she explained "You think you're the only one who's scared to get into a relationship, most people are afraid to give up their heart, that's why people take things slow, because they're scared of giving someone too much, too fast. Now you've gone too fast with Karen and scared her into thinking that this is just another sex-driven fling for you."

"But it's not," Derek protested, looking more vulnerable than Elizabeth had ever seen him "Not with Karen, I've been a player since I left your mother but five years ago Karen walked into that audition room and I knew she was the one."

Elizabeth stared at him questioningly, for a few moments, then burst out laughing "I can't believe it, you two are a living cliché, you're the bad guy who falls in love and changes, that actually happens in real life?"

"Not very often," he chuckled "Now what do you say to us ordering in some Chinese food and talking about it?"

kkkkkk

Karen wandered into the theatre, a few steps behind her despondent room-mates. All night what Derek had said had been playing on her mind. What if he really was only in this for sex and everything else was just a way to get there? Had she completely misread his character and was she going to pay with it with her heart?

As she walked in, she was relieved to see that Derek was yet to arrive. That gave her a few more moments to get her game-head on before she had to jump straight into the work.

Dropping her bag and coat on one of the seats, Karen wandered over to where Charlie, and a few others, were gathered round the piano for vocal warm-ups. It was a relief to lose herself in the stupid tongue-twisters and nonsense-arpeggios for a few glorious minutes. Then Elizabeth bounced in and jumped on Charlie. As the two teenagers locked lips, Karen looked back at the director's chair to see Derek getting settled.

Leaning forward to the microphone, Derek casually called the cast to attention "If Miss Mason would dispatch herself from Mr Montague's face, we'll begin with scene two of act one, we'll run it first without adding anything, just to freshen it in your mind and then we'll start setting off smoke bombs and fireworks and hoping we don't burn the theatre down. So, Sam, would you take it away, please?"

Karen sat with Ivy, Elizabeth and the boys in the audience as all of the other girls and Sam were on stage doing one of the biggest production numbers in the show. It would be very atmospheric once all the special effects were added in but right now it felt sort-of empty on the stage.

As though she knew there was something missing, Karen turned to gauge Derek's shadowed expression. Predictably, he stopped the number halfway through "I need a couple of chorus boys to stand behind Sam and mimic his movements, Ethan, Connor, get up there. Sam's movements are very static, it's just a pose a beat, I want you two to do the same pose, on the beat after he does them. Also, Elizabeth, Ivy and Karen need to be on stage in the crowd at the back to pad it out a little because we are just not filling the theatre at the moment. Let's hope every scene doesn't need this much adjustment." There was a pause as everyone began to move where Derek had put them, but it was long enough for Derek to impatiently clap his hand and shout "Move! Move! Move! We haven't got all day, you know?"

It was then, as she was scrambling into position between her two "sisters", that Karen realised now was probably not the time to be analysing where her relationship with Derek was going. They were in tech, after all, the show would be their life until they were back in New York. This was not the time and all she had to do now was get on her A-game.

eeeeee

The end of rehearsal and Elizabeth hopped off the stage, landing at Charlie's side. As she stumbled a little, Charlie grabbed her waist to steady her "Whoa, watch it Tinkerbell, you're not quite ready to fly."

"Tinkerbell, really?" she cocked her head to one side, smiling teasingly.

With a shrug, he responded "It was either that or Peter-Pan."

"Good choice then," she laughed.

Glancing at where Derek was sat, Charlie whispered "Hey, do you want to get out and explore the city before Daddy notices?"

"No, but I will go out with you after a get his permission," she winked and ran up to the director's chair, grabbing her dance bag on the way. Derek looked up as she arrived, half-smiling wearily. With a smile, she put on her best puppy-dog eyes "Is it okay if I go out with Charlie to explore the city?"

His face dropped into a frown "I don't know, Lizzie..."

"Why?" she whined, sticking out her bottom lip in a pout.

Suspiciously, he eyed Charlie, waiting near the stage for Elizabeth "I don't trust that boy."

"Why wouldn't you trust him?" she put her weight on one leg and rested a hand on her hip.

With a sigh, the director ran his fingers through his hair "Because he's just like I was when I dated your mother and look how well that worked out." Almost immediately, the sassy shield she had been using to try and steam-roll her father dropped. She actually looked slightly guilty. Once the silence had held for a moment, he added "And he's too old for you and you hear things on the grape vine about the girls he's cast off."

"I'll be careful, okay?" she looked through her eyelashes at him "I promise you I won't do anything stupid, I know how to look after my heart and I know not to rush into things. Let me have a little fun."

He gave her a levelling look and then led her down the stairs towards Charlie. Stumbling after him, Elizabeth was both curious and worried about what her father was about to do. Eventually, Derek came to a stop in front of the younger man and told him "I'm going to let Lizzie go out with you but, this is a warning, if you do anything at all to hurt her in any way, you can consider your part in this production gone, understood?"

"Dad!" Elizabeth squealed but, already, Charlie was offering his hand.

"Understood sir, I'll look after her."

ssssss

Sam watched Tom move around their shared hotel room. Unlike Derek's suite, Tom and Sam's room was a simple bedroom and bathroom provided by Eileen for the duration of the stay. Despite the simple furnishings and layout, Sam rather liked it. It was intimate and provided them both with the opportunity for more time together.

Already, Tom had set up a keyboard in the corner and was playing around with new melodies to slide into a scene here or there. This meant that Sam got to watch his fiancé work which was generally forbidden when they were at home. Here it couldn't be helped but, for Tom's benefit, Sam would pretend to be engrossed in his script all the while.

"I know you're not reading," Tom mumbled, as he played.

Pursing his lips, Sam laid down his script "I'm sorry, put you're just adorable when you're working, your forehead creases and sometimes you bite your lip and-"

"Damn it, you're so distracting," he groaned, covering the space between them in moments to press their lips together. On instinct, Sam began to kiss back, moving further down the bed to give them more room. Tom had just began to hungrily deepen the kiss when there was a knock on the door.

Irritably, Tom pulled away and groaned. Chuckling, the dancer pushed him back "Relax, Casanova, I'll deal with it." Sam wandered over to the door and opened it.

To everyone's surprise, there was Ivy. She was clearly very drunk and looked rather dishevelled as she slumped in the door frame, gradually sliding to the ground as she leant there. Apologetically, Sam glanced back at Tom before ducking down to dive an arm around Ivy's waist "Geez Ivy, you're heavier when you're drunk."

"Ivy!" Tom clambered off of the bed and reached over to help the young actress into their room "How much have you had to drink?"

Shrugging, sloppily, she sniffed "Just a teency bit."

"Sweetie, you're not supposed to drink at all, you know you're not good with drugs," Sam sighed, propping her up on the pillows on the bed.

With a lolloping shake of her head, she pointed at him "Al-alcohol isnot a drug and it was justa i-i-ickle bit, an ickle bit."

"Okay, here's what we're going to do," Tom wandered into the bathroom and came back with a cup of water "You are going to drink this water and talk about what's on your mind and then we are going to take you back to your room and hope your room-mates are understanding."

Gratefully, she took the water and sipped it lazily as she began babbling "Everyone's so damn ha-happy. D-d-derek and Karen and you two and then and then Charlie..." and so it went on. Sam had a feeling it was going to be a long night.

eeeeee

Charlie and Elizabeth wandered back into the hotel at around ten. The lobby was still busy with guests coming back from events on that Friday night.

Rubbing her eyes, Elizabeth yawned "That was nice, Charlie, I'm glad my dad let me go."

"It's weird that you call him Dad," the actor commented "You've known he was your dad for like two months and you two act like kindred spirits."

Quietly, she smirked "Maybe we are, I've always wanted a dad, and the fact he's acting like such a stereo-type right now is only feeding my childish fantasies about what my dad was like. I had all of these conspiracy theories about why he couldn't be with Mum and me."

"What, like secret agent and superhero?" he flung an arm around her shoulder as they entered the elevator.

With a nod, she replied "Yeah, but my favourite was that he was actually Jean Valjean from Les Miserables which meant he couldn't possibly be with me because he was on the run from Javert."

"You are such a theatre geek," he laughed. Before she could reply, the elevator doors had slid closed and he had her pinned up against the wall, his lips on hers, his hands by her waist and head, his body flush against hers. As he broke away from her, his eyes sparkled "You know what I've always wanted to try? Sex in an elevator, see if we can keep the doors closed, you know, while we have a little fun."

Elizabeth froze. Looking at him with wide eyes like a deer in the headlights.

"What?" he asked, trailing his fingers down her side "Don't tell me you don't want to?" When she didn't reply, he sighed "Just trust me."

There was a decision here. She could say no, which her gut was telling her to do. She could say yes, which her body was very definitely telling her to do. And her heart? God she didn't know, what she would have given to have Harry there at that moment.


	17. Not This Time

**Author Note – Just wanted to say thank you for all the support, especially your interest in all the little sub-plots I'm running with other characters. I feel like the luckiest writer in the world, right now. This chapter's quite short because it's a bit of a bridge to the next chapter when everything kicks off. Keep the comments coming because every one brightens my day.**

Ivy groaned as there was a knock on the door. Since Sam and Tom had dropped her off in her room, she had been laid, face-down, on her bed, trying to sooth her aching head. Vaguely, she was aware that her room-mates weren't present. She presumed Karen was with Derek and she didn't really give a damn where the others were as long as they weren't bothering her. There was another knock that rattled her stinging brain and she resigned herself to the fact that she would have to crawl out of bed and answer the door.

Every ounce of her being protested as she stumbled to the door and heaved it open. There, looking like a smooth criminal, was Charlie leant in the doorway with eyes dark as sin. So her stomach might have done a few hundred back-flips, which totally wasn't good for her hang-over. Rubbing her temples, she mumbled "Charlie."

"Where are you room-mates?" he asked, peering past her.

With a shrug, she replied "Don't know, don't care, do you know what time it is?"

"Early," he smirked, eyes narrowing mischievously.

Glancing back at the harsh light of her digital clock, Ivy frowned "It's like half-ten, we have rehearsal tomorrow, why aren't you in bed."

"Oh, I intend to be, but not in my own bed, in yours," he leant a little closer and she only just pushed him back before his lips would have touched hers.

Blearily, she said "Wait, what about Elizabeth?"

"Forget about Elizabeth Wills, I want you now, so shut up and kiss me," he smirked, eyes still glinting with hints of desire.

As he leant in again, she stepped back "No, Charlie, I've only slept with someone else's boyfriend once and it, literally, almost killed me. I may have way too much alcohol in my system but not enough to let you in. Now go back to your own room and get some sleep." With that she shoved him back out of the room and slammed the door in his face.

dddddd

Jumping awake, Derek turned to the door of their suite as it slammed shut. He rubbed the sleep from his eyes and saw Elizabeth stood by the door with tears in her eyes. As soon as she noticed him, she asked, her voice high and stressed "Is Karen here?"

"No, I don't know where she is, why, what's wrong?" he wandered closer to her, but was hesitant, like she may explode if he moved too fast with her.

She paused and cast him a considering look, then shook her head "No, I want to talk to Karen." Pacing around the room, she poked her head through doors as if Karen would be found hiding in one of the bedrooms.

"Lizzie, what's wrong," he reached for her arm but she flinched away "You can tell me."

With a shake of her head, she replied "But you'll fire Charlie."

"What has he done?" Derek's voice immediately became a tone darker and he frowned stormily. Finally, the tears began to spill down her cheeks and she fell into his arms, mumbling about how she'd ruined everything. On instinct, he curled his arms around her and began to stroke her hair, gently. Kissing her forehead, he asked softly "What happened, darlin'?"

Sniffling, she buried her head in his shoulder and spoke into the cotton of his t-shirt "He tried to have sex with me, I mean, he wanted to but I wasn't ready and now he's angry and I've ruined everything."

"Hey, sweetheart, look at me, look at me," he pulled away and stooped slightly so that his face was level with hers. Slowly, she turned her amber eyes to meet his and he smiled comfortingly "Just after Karen left bombshell, some girls I'd worked with filed sexual harassment claims against me. I hadn't seen it like that but, then I looked back at the way I'd been with them, Karen especially and realised that, the majority of the time, I had been out of line. From then on in, I always waited for a girl to make the first move if we were working together. You are always completely within your rights to say no and if a boy is angry at you for that, it's him that has the problem, not you."

She hiccuped a little, then wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him closer "You won't fire, Charlie, will you?"

"Not this time, but the next time he makes you cry will be his last and the only reason I'm not this time is because it's right before previews and you care about him enough to ask me not to," he sighed. Admittedly, he would greatly like to fire and castrate this boy but his daughter's trust meant more to him than his own protectiveness.

jjjjjj

It was early in the morning and Julia was meeting Tom to give him the book changes he would need to give to the cast before rehearsals. She stared out at the quiet street which the small café sat on. The pleasant little shop was already a favourite spot of the cast. In fact, it was here Julia had met with Karen last night.

They'd talked for hours about the show, family and guys. Only then was it that Julia realised she hadn't had much time for her old friend since Derek had started the show. With the chance to really catch up, came the chance for Julia to really assess how Karen was. What she'd learned was that the actress was scared. Scared of messing up previews. Scared of the critics. Scared of where her relationship with Derek was going. She was worried that she'd fall too fast or that he'd get scared and leave. His reputation preceded him after all, she was terrified that she would be no different from Ivy or Rebecca.

"What are you daydreaming about, Julia?" Tom asked, sliding into the seat opposite her.

Blinking out of her reverie, she stroked her hair behind her ear "Derek and Karen."

"She's too good for him but she won't listen to anything I tell her so..." he trailed off and shrugged.

She paused for a moment, before leaning forward "Do you remember before the Bombshell previews we were worried about Ivy, well we'd been worried about her for months and we could have done something? You know that ever since then she hasn't been the same, not the girl we all loved in those first auditions or the optimistic up and coming star she was before that. What if the same thing's happening to Karen? What if she breaks down in the middle of previews?"

"Whoa," Tom frowned, leaning forward and laying his hand over hers "Where's all this coming from, Karen may be a little younger than Ivy but she's a lot stronger? I don't think she'd going to derail on us any time soon."

With a sigh, she pondered for a moment whether she could break Karen's confidence and tell Tom about all her worries. Deciding against it, she asked "Look, Tom, could you and Sam just keep an eye on her in rehearsals for me, please, it would make me feel better."

"Sure, I'll do my best," he replied, mildly stunned. If it was anyone else, he would have likely completely disregarded the concern but Julia had good instincts when it came to other people's relationships, just not her own love-life. Then again, her and Frank had just about worked everything out, so maybe she was wiser than he gave her credit for.

Whether he wanted to babysit the Cartwills relationship, however, was an entirely different matter. It was probably true that Derek was too busy with technical rehearsals and chaperoning his not-so-innocent daughter to notice if Karen was getting cold feet. But that was exactly the point, dating someone career obsessed was just about impossible. It wasn't healthy. For Karen's sake, he almost wished that she would realise that now rather than getting in too deep and figuring it out later.

Then again, maybe he was underestimating both of them. Over the last few months, he'd had to at least admit that Derek was human and, therefore, capable of love. Maybe it was possible that Karen was endgame for him. And who was he to think that Karen needed protecting from Derek. She was a grown woman, after all, she should be trusted to protect her own heart. Not that any of that stopped his scepticism.


	18. Step into the Spotlight

**Author Note – I know there were some issues uploading the last chapter, I'm sorry for the inconvenience. Anyway welcome to previews everybody. Thank you so much for the support.**

Elizabeth woke up to the sound of hushed conversation in the next room. She was a very light sleeper so Derek took extra care not to wake her in the mornings, which was sweet of him but she didn't like over-sleeping because it made her feel like she'd missed something. Yawning, she climbed out of bed and looked at her self in the mirror, her hair was a mess but otherwise she looked okay.

Today, they went in front of a public audience for the first time. She couldn't help but grin. This was what she loved most about theatre, that first night with all it's nerves and anticipation. It was the uncertainty that gave her a thrill.

Of course, her and Charlie had worked everything out. He'd apologized for being too pushy and she'd forgiven him. They were exactly where they had been before the whole elevator incident, except Derek never let them go out alone together any more. That didn't bother them though, there was plenty of fun to be had, even with a drove of unofficial chaperones.

She got dressed, brushed out her hair, tied it back at the nape of his neck and walked into their living space. Sure enough, there was Derek sat, practically, whispering to Eileen and Nick as they sat on the couch. With a chuckle, Elizabeth alerted them to her presence "You don't have to worry about waking me, Dad."

"Lizzie, good morning," Derek stood, smiling slightly "Eileen and Nick have offered to buy us breakfast."

With a nod, Elizabeth beamed "Great, and then straight onto the theatre?"

"Naturally," the director smirked but there was something else on his mind. The last few weeks had been hectic but even darting from rehearsal to meeting to rehearsal, he'd noticed that Karen hadn't been around lately. He knew they were both busy but she felt more distant than she had since that first kiss and he was beginning to think that she was avoiding him.

Nevertheless, they didn't have the time to work on their relationship right now, they were in tech with their first preview that night. Relationships could be worked on once they got back home and had a theatre in their pocket.

iiiiii

Ivy looked around the theatre that morning and the realisation finally hit her. This was it, she was the lead in a show she loved and was well on the way to becoming a star. Suddenly none of the shit she'd gone through in the last few years mattered any more, she'd made it.

Just as she was revelling in this thought, Karen walked in and, completely oblivious to Ivy, wandered up onto the stage to stare out into the audience. It was quite obvious that the younger woman thought she was alone as her eyes flickered over the velvet-coated empty seats. Then she took a deep breath and sung, accapella, the first few lines of _Poison Doctors_. Frowning, she stopped and nodded before pacing off into the dressing rooms.

Ivy wondered how many similar incidents she'd encounter if she waited here long enough. Nevertheless, she scurried onto the stage and to the dressing rooms through the wings.

Now everyone was beginning to arrive. Some entombed in their own surround-sound world as they wandered through the stage door after a quick jog, pulling headphones from their head as they went. Others came in groups giggling enthusiastically and reciting their lines to each other to check they knew them. Then there were people who came in with their faces a picture of nerves or those who looked way more confident than they should. Everyone had their own way of dealing with the first-night nerves and it amused Ivy to observe the different rituals.

Her heart stopped as she saw Charlie, beaming in the golden boy way he did, stood with arms wide. Just for a moment, she allowed herself to pretend he was opening his arms for her but then Elizabeth leapt into his arms, their lips meeting as she reached him.

Ivy hurried off to her dressing room, telling herself that she did because Elizabeth's arrival meant that Derek would be calling them to work in a little while and not because she couldn't face watching Charlie kiss someone else. Well, she'd had her chance with him and thrown it to the wind for his own good, that was what you did when you loved someone. You wanted them to be happy, no matter how much that hurt you.

dddddd

Shuffling through his notes, the director was only half-aware of the different members of the cast filing into the theatre. Once the creative team were all present he'd begin, regardless of who else was missing.

He often wondered if any of the members of the cast realised that he was just as nervous as they were. This was his work too, his baby, that he was sending off to school for the first time. As much as he'd scoffed when Tom had referred to this show as his baby, Derek felt just as protective of the work now. Nothing like this had hit Broadway in years, it was one of the best shows he'd ever worked on. Yet, still, he found it hard to say that it was the next Wicked or Rent because it wasn't, it was different to anything they'd seen before. It was its own show and it would drive a whole new generation of composers and performers to the city that never sleeps. He just had to trust that his direction did it justice.

"You look deep in thought, Derek," Tom commented, as he took his seat near the director's table.

With a roll of his eyes, the director replied "Don't make small talk, Tom, we both know we dislike each other."

"You know, you could actually pretend to be a decent person every once in a while," he replied, then paused a moment in wait for Derek's witty response. When none came, he continued "You're right though, I don't like you but I do like Karen and if you two are a couple I thought I should make an effort. I don't know why I bother though, since I doubt you two are going to last out previews at this rate."

Starting, Derek glanced up at the composer "What's that supposed to mean?"

"It's not supposed to mean anything," Tom folded his arms, observing the taller man with a quirked eyebrow "All I'm saying is that a blind man could see that Karen's been avoiding you and Julia's been pressing me to keep an eye on that girl for weeks. That, to me, means that you two are in deep trouble, whether you're aware of that or not."

Clearly stunned, he turned to the stage and bellowed "Karen Cartwright!" All he could think was that he couldn't possibly lose her, even if they were in the middle of a technical rehearsal, he needed to speak to her. He needed to tell her that there was nothing to be scared of. That he loved her and they could go the distance. They had to go the distance.

"What are you doing?" Tom hissed, all his bravado vanishing and his cheeks flushing red with embarrassment.

As though it was obvious, Derek replied "Talking about it, isn't that what people in relationships do?"

"Not in front of all of your colleagues, including many who would go the press with updates on you two," he whispered urgently. The tap of dance shoes on boards alerted the two men to Karen's presence.

Derek rarely hid his thoughts or feelings. On the whole he was a pretty straight-forward kind of guy and didn't care what anyone thought of him. He said what he thought, resolved disputes with simple frankness. It was often rough, but it worked.

Love in his life, however, ran on a completely different set of rules. This was mainly due to the fact that he hadn't developed his brutal honestly when he was eighteen and that was the last time he'd been in love. It was dangerous to admit things concerning affairs of the heart, even to your closest of companions, so he kept his feelings under lock and key. As well as this he was a very private person, he didn't really want the press getting hold of anything to do with himself and Karen.

So, albeit awkwardly, he looked at her wide eyed and asked her the first thing that came to mind "Has everyone arrived yet?"

"I think so," she replied, feeling out of place stood on the stage, with most of the cast watching curiously from the wings.

Finding himself without anything else to say, Derek glanced at Tom for some sort of inspiration. Smoothly, the composer leant forward to the director's microphone and said "Can we have everyone out here for vocal warm-ups please." For the first time in his life, Derek felt thankful for the existence of Tom Leavitt.

eeeeee

Elizabeth had never been this nervous about a show, ever. As she stood next to Ivy in the wings, waiting for the overture to begin. If she was much more nervous her innards would be running away to join the circus with a trapeze act.

"Are you okay?" Ivy asked.

Surprised that Ivy was making any effort to speak to her, Elizabeth replied "Er, yeah, what about you?"

"Okay, yeah, how are you and Charlie?" she gently pried.

Suspiciously, the younger girl frowned "Fine, thanks Ivy."

"Ah, well, I just wanted you to know that..." the blonde trailed off, not truly knowing how to continue. Then, she regained her confidence and told her "Charlie and I used to sleep together and I know that he hasn't told you because I knew it would be better for him if we didn't tell anyone, he didn't need to get associated with me when he was just starting out. Anyway, the point is I thought you should know."

Maybe, Elizabeth would have replied, would have done more than just stare at Ivy in shock but she heard the buzz of her mic turning on. There was no way she could push Ivy for more information, not without alerting the whole auditorium. Besides, the overture had just started up which meant they had two minutes until they had to rush out onto the stage.

From the other side of the stage, Karen flashed her a quick smile and then all three of them rushed out for the beginning of the show. William joined them shortly and they leapt into the characters they'd been practising for months.

Eventually, when the three girls retired to their dressing room to change for the end of scene four and Elizabeth was sure her microphone was off, she got the chance to wheel round on Ivy "Are you trying to threaten me?"

"No, I just feel you have a right to know that Charlie and I used to be something and we aren't long broken up," she spoke plainly, glancing at Karen as she eyed them both wearily.

As she began to unbutton her maid's dress, the younger girl asked icily "Aha, and how long ago did you break up, exactly?"

"The day before the workshop," Ivy admitted "Look, I'm not looking to pick a fight with you, I just thought you deserved to know and I also want you to know that, if you ever need a friend, I'm here."

It was then that Reagan popped her head round the door and looked like she might faint at the sight of the three of them not even out of their maid's costumes "You have five minutes before you need to be on stage."

Glancing at each other, the three Brontë sisters began to climb out of their costumes at high speed and into the muted greens and browns of their Brontë costumes. Then they rushed past Reagan and into the wings where they burst on just in time to replace the children who played them as children. It didn't escape Elizabeth's notice that Derek heaved a sigh of relief in the wings when they only just made their cue.

kkkkkk

Previews had gone well and now Karen was alone in her hotel room. The rest of the cast had gone out to celebrate but Karen just sat staring at the phone in her hand. Restlessly, she scrolled through the sparse list of contacts for someone to call.

She felt so utterly alone, like there was no-one in the world that she could talk to. It felt like Bombshell five years ago. When Dev had cheated and she'd been so confused about Derek. There was Julia but she had got on the first plane back to her family once she was sure that the show could survive without her. As much as she was sure that Sam and Tom would listen, she didn't feel comfortable talking to them. Elizabeth was so young and had too many of her own problems to be saddled with Karen's as well. Who did that leave? All the friends she'd had before she'd moved to New York had been gone with the wind as soon as fame had inevitably isolated her.

That only left one name in her contacts. A name who had once been so dear to her but had betrayed her trust once to often. It was a name she still called despite that because, though she could never love him like she did before, he still knew her better than anyone else in the world. Now he called her in his most desperate moments and she called him when she needed someone. Though she couldn't remember how this arrangement started and she hadn't took advantage of it since she'd met Derek again, it was still comforting to keep that path open.

So, taking a deep breath, she selected the name and held the phone to her ear.

"Hello?"

"Hey, Dev, it's me."


	19. What A Douche

"So, you and Derek huh?" Dev grinned as he lounged on the couch in Karen's apartment.

With a roll of her eyes she threw a pillow at him and got up to head towards the kitchen "I like him, okay, I just, it feels like it's moving too fast at the moment."

"Maybe that's because you're not right for each other," he suggested, his eyes tracking her movements as she put together a couple of cups of coffee.

Suspiciously, she looked up from the kettle to meet his gave "And maybe you're just saying that because you're jealous."

"Don't flatter yourself," he smiled softly. It was no secret that Dev still had feelings for Karen, he didn't even try to hide it from her or anyone else. This was why their meetings weren't as frequent as those of most close friends, because being around his hinting and flirting made Karen a little uncomfortable. Nevertheless he knew her better than anyone and she needed that.

Passing him the coffee, Karen dropped back into her seat in the armchair next to the couch "I don't know though, he hasn't had a relationship since he was in his late teens and it's odd feeling like I'm the experienced one with a guy who's been with so many other girls."

"And that makes you feel intimidated?" he cocked his head to one side like a petulant puppy.

With a slight lift of her shoulders, she replied "Maybe a little bit, but it's not just that, it's all I'm risking by getting involved with him."

"You mean like your dignity, your self-respect, your work on this show and possibly your whole career, did I miss anything?" he reeled off, finishing off his coffee.

In a tone which could only be descried as resigned, she added "My heart."

"And let's face it," he slid off the sofa so he was squatting at her feet with his head resting on his arms on her lap "He doesn't have the best track record in the world."

Karen couldn't help it, she began stroking his hair as she sighed "You're really not helping, you know?"

"Maybe I'm just telling you what you need to hear," he suggested and her stomach turned at the thought of Derek leaving her. If that felt this bad before they'd even started properly who knew how gut-wrenchingly terrible it would feel to lose him if she let herself fall for him. Would it be so bad to quit while she'd ahead?

A knock at the door broke Karen out of her revelry. Startled by the sound, it took her a moment to dislodge Dev and wander towards the door. As she opened it, her innards knotted at the sight of Derek stood with Elizabeth and Ivy.

She was suddenly hyper-aware of how bad this little scene must look from someone-else's eyes. Here she is with her ex-boyfriend on his knees on her living room floor while her current almost-boyfriend has arrived unexpectedly. Karen is also aware that her current expression of horror is not helping the situation so she forces an awkward smile as Derek explains "I thought I'd gather my Brontës for a quick discussion about the arrangements Eileen's making theatre-wise and some of my notes from previews."

Relief flooded through her, she might just get away without them noticing Dev there "Great, I'll just grab my coat and-"

"Actually, Karen, I was thinking we could talk here," he admitted "We don't mean to invite ourselves but it's cheaper than going to a restaurant and nowhere else is really appropriate plus I don't want anyone overhearing our plans for the show."

Resigned, she moved aside and let them in. As soon as Derek spotted Dev, however, he stopped dead and Elizabeth very nearly ran into his back. Tone darkening, Derek practically growled "What are you doing here?"

In an attempt to make everything okay, she explained "Did I mention Dev and I are still friends?"

"Why?" Ivy asked before Derek could, voice full of disdain "I mean I only slept with him once and I hate him, he cheated on you!"

With a shake of his head, Derek added "You were heartbroken, Karen, how can you even look at him?"

"Because he knows me better than anyone else and sometimes I need that," she admitted, awkwardly rubbing the back of her neck.

Standing up beside her, Dev smirked "And I'm reasonably good at picking up the pieces when arse-hole directors make passes that weren't welcome."

"Bombshell?" Derek frowned, searching Karen's eyes "You went to him when you left Bombshell?"

She nodded without meeting his gaze "Who else was I going to talk to?"

"Anyone besides this guy," he gestured towards Dev, eyes blazing.

Tentatively, Elizabeth said "I don't mean to interrupt this odd battle for Karen's affections, but I have no idea what's going on."

"Well," Ivy cocked her hip and folded her arms "Dev is Karen's ex-boyfriend who stopped being supportive of her career almost as soon as she started work on Bombshell, kissed one of his colleagues, proposed to Karen, cheated on her with me and left the ring at my apartment."

For good measure, Derek added "He also punched me once when I came to apologize to Karen for being out of line in auditions."

"Wow, what a douche," the teenager spoke plainly, then grabbed Ivy's arm and pulled her towards the door "Still, I don't think this is our fight, see you later Dad." With that Ivy and Elizabeth were gone and Karen was left to stand between the two men who knew her best.

Glancing between them, Karen considered their differences. Dev knew her from study, from years spent by her side he had learnt her. The way Derek knew her didn't need work, he just understood the pattern of her heartbeat and the pick of her thoughts. It was as though he was an extension of herself but she couldn't trust that part of herself not to posses her and then tear her to pieces.

With a look in his eyes almost like defeat, Derek said "I know I've been busy lately but, please, talk to me, don't shut me out and then call Dev." She shouldn't have been stunned, of course Derek would spot her distance all through previews and of course he would read her mind and know exactly why she'd done it. Still he didn't get the whole story with one glance, he was still a relationship novice.

"That isn't the whole story..." she began but felt Dev's hand on her arm and flinched slightly. Seeing the interaction, Derek reached out, took her hand and pulled her towards him. Strangely, that possessive motion made her feel safer than she had before. How was it that Derek made her feel safer than Dev, the definition of safe, did?

A smug expression on his face, Dev explained "She thinks that you're moving too fast, you're scaring her."

"I know," he looked down at his hand in hers then smiled slightly "My teenage daughter gave me a heads up that first night in Philadelphia but I guess I didn't take her seriously." He paused, glanced back over her shoulder at Dev, then focussed on her, rubbing circles on the back of my hand "I'm new at this, so you have to tell me when I'm moving too fast or, I don't know, breaking etiquette but, in return, I promise to always listen and never hurt you."

"Bullshit!" Dev cried.

With a roll of his eyes, Derek sighed "And though I won't tell you who and who not to be friends with, it would be nice to get rid of him."

"Okay," Karen breathed.

Outraged, Dev practically screamed "What?!"

"I need some time to think," she snapped at Dev, pulled away from Derek "So, I'd appreciate it if you both left." Dev left grumbling but Derek simply nodded, planted a kiss on her knuckles and wandered from the apartment.

Only just catching her breath, she closed the door and looked round the empty apartment. What was she going to do?

iiiiii

As Ivy wandered into her own tiny apartment, after seeing that Elizabeth got home safe, her head was spinning. The conversation that Ivy had just had with the teenager had made her feel incredibly guilty. Apparently there was nothing Elizabeth hated more than cheating and dishonesty.

Reaching for her phone, Ivy dialled Charlie's number from memory. There was no way she could let him lie "Charlie?"

"Hi, Ivy, what's up?" he drawled.

With a sigh, she sat at her dressing-table and said "You have to tell Lizzie that you tried to sleep with me when she turned you down."

There was a pause and then he ventured "Are you trying to ruin my relationship with Lizzie or is it just a coincidence that you keep coming out with this stuff?"

"If she finds out from someone else it will break her heart," she pointed out.

Incredulously, Charlie replied "And yet it won't break her heart if she hears it from me?"

"It will hurt less than her hearing it from someone else," she looked at herself in the mirror and wondered if it would have hurt less if Derek had told her about Rebecca rather than her finding out for herself.

"Who else is going to tell her, we're the only ones who know?"

Before she really thought about it, Ivy declared "I will if you don't she hates liars, Charlie."

"Fine, I'll tell her but if this back-fires I'm blaming you," he groaned, hanging up as he did so. For the first time in what felt like forever, Ivy felt proud of herself for doing the right thing by someone else.

kkkkkk

Karen was watching the notebook. It wasn't helping her make any decision, it was just making her cry. Why was it that she watched this movie when she needed comforting it provided no relief whatsoever? Just as they went out on the boat on the lake there was a knock on the door.

Irritably, she climbed up off the shoulder and hoped it wasn't Derek or Dev. As it happened, it wasn't.

Kate smiled as Karen opened the door "Hey, have you been crying?"

"The note book," the brunette explained, indicating the television.

Nodding in understanding, Kate sighed "Whenever I was having trouble with Derek I would watch either Wuthering Heights or Pride and Predjudice." At that both burst out laughing and Karen moved aside to let her guest in. Before long both were seated on the couch with mugs of coffee in hand.

As she turned off the television, Karen asked "So, what brings you to my humble flat?"

"Elizabeth told me that you're getting cold feet with Derek," she replied, raising a questioning eyebrow as if daring Karen to contradict her.

Guiltily, the actress admitted "He's been so good to me but all these doubts keep playing over in my mind. His reputation and the feeling that I'm falling for him way too fast."

"You're scared he's going to bail?" Kate asked, cocking her head to one side.

She shrugged "Maybe. All I know is that if he does it could destroy me, especially if I get in any deeper than I do now."

"Okay, I may not have been with Derek in eighteen years but I know him better than most people in the world," Kate began, putting her mug down "And I know that when he commits, he really commits, he's actually one of the most loyal people I know, he's not going to bail on you for no reason. Leaving him was one of the biggest mistakes of my life, that doesn't mean I still have feelings for him or that he was 'the one' but we needed to let our relationship run it's course and we didn't do that. He's one of those guys who's intoxicating and, believe me, you'll get addicted and you have to be prepared to bleed for him because being around that all the time really takes it out on you. In the long run though, it's totally worth it. I suggest that you give him a real chance because that feeling that he could destroy you, that sounds to me like he's the one."


	20. Karaoke Night

**Author Note** –** This is only a short chapter but I've been waiting to write it for ages. The songs included/mentioned are There's No Business Like Show Business (Annie Get Your Gun), All Too Well (Taylor Swift), Five and a Half Minutes (Kerrigan and Lowdermilk), I'll Cover You (Rent) and A Case of You (Joni Mitchell). Thank you for the support, keep the comments coming, love you all.**

The karaoke bar was dark and Karen could feel the whole room trembling with anticipation as she hid behind a table, in-between Tom and Julia. Most of the cast of Brontë was in the bar which they'd all got together to rent out for the night. There were also a few friends of Derek's who had been invited for the occasion.

Bobby scuttled into the room "He's just pulled up!" Then he rushed back to duck behind a chair.

Everyone tensed up as the door opened and Elizabeth walked in. She glanced back over her shoulder and put her thumbs up grinning. Then, she too scuttled back to hide.

As if on queue, Derek wandered in calling "Lizzie, I don't think this place is open!"

Someone switched the light on and everyone in the room jumped to their feet crying "Happy birthday, Derek!" He blinked at the change in light and saw the cast gathered in the bar, grinning. The bar staff now emerged from the kitchen and, already, Bobby and one of the chorus boys were running up to the stage with little Dakota who was the oldest of the children on the show. The three of them were soon singing _There's No Business Like Show Business_.

Stunned, Derek glanced around the bar as Veronica came up to peck his cheek and Kate smugly admitted that she had told the cast when his birthday was. Everyone was dancing or flocking to greet Derek but Karen stood at the side of the room. She'd been avoiding Derek for days, in rehearsal she was sure to keep out of his way unless he was directly talking to her. Whenever there was a chance he might try to talk to her, she'd cling to Julia, Sam or Tom. Now she wasn't sure what to do.

Kate came to stand by her "I'm guessing you're still in purgatory on the Derek front."

"Purgatory? What does that make him, heaven or hell?" Karen chuckled, ironically.

Quirking an eyebrow, Kate pointed out "Isn't that what you're trying to find out."

Suddenly, their conversation was broken by Elizabeth's shrill cry "Harry!" The whole room stopped to look at the scene. Charlie had her arms around Elizabeth's waist as both stood staring at one of the waiters, Harry.

With a sigh, Kate put a hand on Karen's arm "If you'll excuse me, I have to go and rescue my daughter."

As the awkward silence continued, Kate paced across the room and smiled at Elizabeth "Sweetheart, didn't you say you were going to sing with me, the mic's free." Nodding weakly, Elizabeth led the way to the stage. Karen thought it was almost funny, only in New York could a tense situation be diffused through song. Still, she couldn't help but notice how Derek's head snapped up to where Kate and Elizabeth had taken the stage, how he looked almost afraid when his daughter began to sing.

Though Elizabeth kept her eyes fixed on Harry, Kate and Derek locked gazes and it made Karen's stomach twist. This was the only other woman in the world who Derek had opened up to and there was no doubt that the connection was still there. Once Elizabeth had finished singing, Kate's clear untrained voice began "_And I left my scarf there, at your sister's house and you still have it in your drawer, even now_."

Karen thought of the night when Derek had opened up about Kate, the box of pictures and the way he'd cried. "_Autumn leaves falling down like pieces into place and I can picture it after all these days._"

As the two girls... women harmonised on the chorus of Taylor Swift's _All Too Well _Karen could feel it, feel Derek's heart locked with hers. Kate sung to Derek and Elizabeth sung to Harry, rapt emotion in their voices as the curved and twisted around each other. There wasn't a dry in the house, apart from Charlie, he stood staring stonily at the two of them, or rather at the younger of the two. Nevertheless, Karen had tears in her eyes and applauded like the rest of them when they finished.

Another spotlight-hog took the stage and Karen wiped her eyes and retreated to the lady's room. It was empty, allowing her to eye herself questioningly in the mirror. What did she want? Why did she even need to ask herself that question? She knew what she wanted, it was just a question of whether that was safe in the long run.

Elizabeth stumbled into the bathroom, crying. Blinking, Karen asked "Hey, what's wrong?"

"Did you know that Charlie tried to sleep with Ivy while we were on previews?" she asked, wiping her face clumsily.

On instinct, she reached out for her and pulled her into her arms "No, I'm sorry Lizzie."

"I broke up with Harry for that guy, Harry who's so bloody loyal and perfect," she sniffed, trying to get herself together "I just can't think straight."

Chuckling without humour, Karen replied "When it comes to guys, you're not the only one."

There was a loud knock on the door and a clear British accent called "I'm coming in, so you all better be decent!" Derek rushed in and Karen wondered what exactly he had thought they would be doing. Blinking at the two of them, he asked "What's wrong?"

Wordlessly, Elizabeth rushed to his arms and he caught her like it was a reflex. With a small smile, Karen moved to give them some space "Happy birthday, Derek."

"Thanks," he replied as she walked back out into the bar.

Ivy had taken the stage now. It must have been the night of ballads because she was clearly singing to Charlie, tears in her eyes "_Feels like some old movie, but the script's no good and the girl's no beauty,_

_There's the evidence -_

_More facts -_

_But there won't ever be a science of_

_the way you find or keep or measure love._

_How do you find or keep or measure love?_"

As she finished, Julia took the stage to introduce Tom and Sam singing _I'll Cover You_. At least someone was going to try and lighten the mood, at the moment this was feeling more like a soap opera than a party. People started dancing again and Karen went to the bar to get a drink.

"Nice party, huh?" a girl Karen didn't recognise commented in a British accent like Derek's, as she sat on a stool by the bar.

With a nod, she half-smiled "I was hoping it would be a little more jolly since the cast basically picked a venue they loved because they didn't know what Derek would want."

"Oh come on, someone must have known that he hates karaoke," she chuckled.

Sheepishly, Karen admitted "I don't think many people took the time to get to know Derek, we're lucky we have Kate to tell us when his birthday is."

"I guess that's Derek for you, he doesn't exactly open up to people," the girl laughed.

Glancing up to see Tom and Sam leave the stage, Karen backed away from the bar "Excuse me, I want to grab the mic before anyone else does." As she walked up to the microphone, she saw Derek re-enter the bar "Hi, er, this one is dedicated to our birthday boy-" a rowdy cheer erupted in the room.

With a nervous smile, she focussed on Derek and sighed "This is _A Case of You_. _Just before our love got lost you said_

_"I am as constant as a northern star"_

_And I said "Constantly in the darkness_

_Where's that at?_

_If you want me I'll be in the bar"..._" She caught his gaze and held it as his mouth hung slightly agape at the sight of her. There was no movement in her performance, she didn't need it, she just sold the song with the intensity of her eyes and expression. As she got to the last verse, her tone softened and her eyes flickered to where Kate was sat "_I met a woman_

_She had a mouth like yours_

_She knew your life_

_She knew your devils and your deeds _

_And she said-_" she looked back at Derek "_"Go to him, stay with him if you can _

_But be prepared to bleed"_" she took up the microphone and walked off stage, down into the bar, through the crowd and to where Derek was stood "_Oh but you are in my blood _

_You're my holy wine _

_You're so bitter, bitter and so sweet_

_Oh, I could drink a case of you darling..._" she trailed her fingers along his jawline "_Still I'd be on my feet _

_I would still be on my feet_." As soon as she finished he captured her lips in a kiss and she draped her arms around his neck. She'd made her decision and it was him. Screw the consequences, she loved this man. Wait, loved?

"Would this be a bad time to announce my arrival?"

They broke apart and looked at the girl who Karen had spoken to at the bar. Blinking, Derek's eyes widened "Emma!"

"Happy Birthday, Derek," she smirked, it was a perfect imitation of Derek's smirk in fact.

With a nervous chuckle, Karen said "Please tell me this isn't another ex-girlfriend."

The girl made a barfing noise and Derek rolled his eyes at her "No, this is Emma Wills."

"His baby sister," she finished, smugly.


	21. Lip Gloss Smile

**Author Note – Thank you for all the amazing comments, I think I am now addicted and get withdrawal when I don't get any. I love you all and I'm sorry it took me so long to update, it's been a hectic week.**

Everyone stood in an odd sort of stalemate for awhile until Derek grabbed his coat took Karen's arm "We'll get going, thanks for the party guys." As he marched them both to the door, he called over his shoulder "Are you coming Ems?"

"Just getting my purse, wait a second," the click of her heels sounded like singular canon shots with each step in the echoing silence. It was eery. Nevertheless, it didn't seem to bother her a jot, she simply got her things together and followed them out.

Somehow, Karen felt out of place in-between her boyfriend and his sister. The girl in question was quite tall but a few inches shorter than Derek. Her mousy hair was highlighted blonde and her eyes were feline and piercing like Derek's. Unconsciously, Karen began to pick out similarities in their appearances. The siblings had the same nose, the same mouth and skin-tone, only Emma's were noticeably more feminine.

Eyeing her curiously, Emma offered her hand to Karen as they walked "I don't believe we've been properly introduced, little miss booty-call."

"Booty-what?" Karen blinked in surprise and Derek laid his hands softly on her hips as she moved her out of the way. Now it was him that stood between the two women.

Gently, he took Karen's hand "I'd appreciate it if you didn't talk to Karen like that, Em."

"Don't get your undies in a twist, Derder," she shrugged, then eyed the brunette beside with a mischievous smile "But don't all your flings fit this mould? Young, talented, beautiful, I'm guessing she's the lead in whichever show you're working on at present, you probably got into her pants on the casting couch and now she's utterly and irreversibly in love with you."

How do you reply to that? For a few moments, Karen gawked at the young woman. To her surprise, however, Derek wound his arm around her waist, pecked her cheek and told Emma "For your information, Karen and I haven't slept together yet, not that it's any of your business. Now let's hail a cab and leave the talking to when we get back to the apartment."

"Cab?" Emma raised a sceptical eyebrow as her brother held his arm out into the road "Damn it, Derek, you've been living in America too long, say it with me now, _taxi_."

Derek rolled his eyes as the cab pulled up to the curb and opened the door for the girls "Do the world a favour and shut your gob for the duration of the journey."

"Ah, gob, that word is definitely British, well done big brother," she hopped in. Karen shifted nervously on the pavement for a few moments. Smiling sympathetically, he kissed her cheek and slid into the car after Emma, so he was between his sister and his girlfriend. Calmly, he told the driver his address and then turned his face to the city as his hand found Karen's between them.

As ordered by Derek, they stayed silent for the entire journey home but as soon as her heels hit the side-walk, Emma's voice pierced the air once more "How long has it been since I've been here? I can't even think, have you seen Dad yet this year?"

"Yeah, a few months back," he replied as he led the way up to his apartment, fingers in-twined with Karen's "You?"

With a shake of her head, Emma said "No but I have had the pleasure of meeting the even more estranged parent."

In the corridor of his apartment building, Derek froze "You've seen Mum?"

"Yep, she'd rounding us all up," she shrugged like a moody teenager trying to irritate a parent "Turns out we're all in the city at the same time, what are the chances?"

Darkly, he started walking again, hand tightening on Karen's "Too slim to not have been engineered by her."

"So cynical, Derek?" Emma teased.

Seeing the building discomfort in Derek's expression, Karen pulled her hand away from him and slung an arm about his waist. As though he'd been suddenly reminded to breath, he exhaled. Then he cast an arm over her shoulders and softly kissed her hair. With an almost-contented sigh, he commented "Always, Emma."

They came to his front door and he let them in before releasing Karen. Together they walked in. Derek poured them three drinks without having to ask either girl what they wanted. Tensely the two women eyed each other as they waited for their common-companion to return.

"You know?" Derek passed them their drinks "You two can talk to each other."

As though it was obvious, Emma told him "I'm the protective sister; I'm not supposed to like your girlfriends."

"I don't need you to look after me Em," he pointed out, then glanced between the two of them gauging how bad the rift between them was. How two women could dislike each other so quickly was beyond him. Then again, he thought that the bad blood was mostly on Emma's side. Karen didn't have a lot of hate in her.

With a sigh, his sister looked at his girlfriend and asked "So, tell me a bit about yourself, Karen."

"Well, I'm an actress in the production Derek's directing and we've been official since just before previews," she said slowly.

Rolling her eyes, Emma shook her head "I didn't ask you for a map of your relationship with Derek, I asked you about you." There was a pause, as Karen searched her blank mind for something interesting and likeable about herself. Impatient, Emma groaned "Jesus, Derek, don't you ever find girls with half a brain?"

"Why are you here, Emma?" Derek moved to stand with Karen, placing a hand on the small of her back.

She folded her arms "I already told you."

"No you didn't," he frowned "You told me Mum was in town, you told me she was trying to gather the estranged brood to meet with her once more before she disappears for another ten years but you did not tell me why you were here."

As he ranted at her, Emma had slumped slightly, investigating her shoes with interest. Now she looked back up with tears in those eyes that were so like Derek's "We never get to see her, Derder, I know she's unpredictable but can't you just accept that and love her anyway."

"I never said I didn't love her," he held up a hand to stop her talking "Of course I love her but it's much more complicated than that and you know it."

With a swing of her hips she turned for the door "I'll go and give her a damage report, but I think you're being very selfish in not letting us be a family again."

"Emma, we haven't been a family since you were two years old," he pointed out, just as she darted out of his apartment. Almost as soon as she was gone, Derek seemed to shrink in size. When Karen went to place her hand on his arm, he flinched away then rubbed his temples.

Watching him, Karen could swear he was trembling slightly as he stooped. In little more than a whisper, she floated a question on the air "Do you want to talk about it?"

"Yes," he breathed, painstakingly lifting his head so that he could meet her eyes "But not tonight, tonight can we just talk about nothing at all?"

A few steps took her into his arms. Gratefully, he closed his embrace around her, burying his face in the safe softness of her hair. Just for tonight, they could talk the time away and he could fall in love with her all over again, regardless of the imaginative ways his family decided to ruin his life.

eeeeee

Kate and Elizabeth sat opposite each other at the breakfast table. All manner of food was spread over the tiny kitchen table as Kate always liked to make sure Elizabeth had a lot of food in her before she had to leave for rehearsal. It was as though she didn't think her daughter ate properly without her supervision.

"Mum, is Dad's family life completely haywire?" it was a random question and Elizabeth knew it but she had been wondering.

Blinking, Kate set down her coffee and frowned thoughtfully "Well, when Derek was four or five, his mum took off and left him, his brothers and his sister with Charles. So Derek grew up with a closeted gay flautist who was constantly on the road. The kids spent breaks touring with Charles and the rest of their time in boarding school. Derek and his older brother, David, never stayed in the same school more than a year, they were consummate partners in crime, always getting expelled. Anyway, every few years, their mum would turn up again, implant herself in their lives and then disappear on the wind without a word of goodbye. Your dad didn't have the most stable childhood in the world and it's taken its toll on him."

"Wow," Elizabeth raised her eyebrows in surprise "And I thought I was the only complicated family he had."

Kate simply chuckled, then cocked her head to one side "How are things with you in Charlie?"

"I'm not sure," the teenager admitted "I'm hoping to talk to him at rehearsals today but Dad might try and keep him away from me."

With a small smirk, Kate commented "I think he might be too busy dealing with the rest of his complicated family to worry about you."

"Let's hope so, I better get going," Elizabeth grabbed one last slice of toast and headed for the door.

dddddd

Derek woke up finding that his back ached and his head felt as though it was being pounded with a rock from the inside out. It took him a moment to realise that he was sleeping on the settee and that he wasn't warm because he was covered with his thick quilt but because Karen was lying on top of him. Both of them were fully clothed and tangled up as they lay on the sofa. Though he couldn't remember which of them fell asleep first or when their talking became too drowsy for coherency, he was aware that they happened.

Now, with Karen's face mere inches from his, he could investigate every beautiful imperfection in her silken skin and the adorable way her mascara had smudged around her eyes. Her hands were fisted in his shirt, even as she slept. Delicately, her breath tickled his neck, slightly heavier on the exhale. He wondered what she was dreaming of. He wondered whether it was him who made her foot twitch against his leg.

All too soon, her eyelashes began to flicker and she shifted, her elbow digging into his ribs. He inhaled in surprise, moving to accommodate her new position. Unfortunately, she adjusted her body as well and all too soon the momentum had carried them both off the sofa and onto the floor. Despite his best efforts to save her, Karen hit the wooden floor first.

Eyes flying open, she found Derek only just holding his weight off her. After a brief moment of confusion, she chuckled "Note to self, for future reference I don't think we should sleep on the couch."

"I'll agree there," he grinned, dropped his lips onto hers for a perfect moment and then rolled off her. He climbed to his feet and pulled her up with him "You okay."

With a vague nod, she rubbed her eyes "Yeah, but I really should run back to my apartment, I cannot go to rehearsals in this dress."

"You're okay, I've got some clothes you can borrow," Derek shrugged, heading towards the stairs.

Frowning, she asked "Why have you got girls clothes?"

As he paused at the bottom of the stairs, he cringed a little and rubbed the back of his neck "This sort of thing happens to me a lot, a girl needing a change of clothes to go to rehearsals."

"Why am I not surprised?" she laughed and he found himself relieved that she hadn't gone crazy about that fact. Then again, it wasn't as though he'd ever hidden that there had been a lot of casual flings since he'd broken up with Kate. Running a hand through her hair, Karen cocked her head to one side "Can I use your shower?"

With a nod, he smiled "Sure, use the one in my room, I'll lay some clothes out on the bed."

tttttt

"You should have seen Derek at the beginning of his career," Tom recalled as he walked down Broadway between Sam and Ivy. All three of them had matching coffees in their hands and were discussing the untimely arrival of Derek's sister.

Curiously, Sam asked "Why, what was he like?"

"Constantly distracted and so messed up," he explained "Still arrogant and self-assured but constantly looking over his shoulder as though someone was all-too-ready to pull him down."

Almost confused by this new image of Derek, Ivy's tone heightened with the pitch of surprise "You mean he was paranoid?"

"Yeah, but maybe he was just waiting for someone to walk in," Tom considered "I also got the impression that he was constantly wanting to be accepted, not that he'd ever ask for it directly, you just got that feeling, you know?"

With a shake of her head, Ivy commented "I can't imagine Derek like that."

"Funny enough," Tom smirked "He was a lot easier to work with, he and I really clicked back then. Maybe it was because we both came from broken homes."

Watching his fiancé intently, Sam asked "So what changed?"

"When that show of ours flopped, something in Derek was gone," he replied "I think it was his vulnerability, he put up walls that he wasn't going to let down for anyone, including people he used to call friends."

kkkkkk

When Karen walked into the kitchen in leggings and a tank-top (courtesy of Derek) she found Derek had cooked her breakfast. Smiling, she slid into a seat at the kitchen counter "I never thought I'd see you cooking."

"Being the eternal bachelor means getting to know your way around a kitchen," he chuckled, leaning in to capture her lips in a chaste kiss before continuing "Plus Mum and Dad weren't around much when we were growing up so the four of us learnt to fend for ourselves somewhat."

Taking a fork to her all-day breakfast, she commented "You said you'd talk about your family, last night, well there's no time like the present."

"What do you want to know?" he asked as he sat down opposite her.

With a solemnity in her expression, Karen said "Let's start with why you don't want to meet with your mother."

"You sound like a therapist," he half-groaned, rubbed his temples and then sighed "I don't want to see my mum because she never stays. She always sticks around just long enough for you to think that she might actually be there this time and then she takes off again and she usually doesn't even take the time to say goodbye."

She took a moment to consider that, then smiled "But you still love her."

"Yes, of course but I don't really see the relevance of-"

"So it doesn't matter that she's going to take off again," she interrupted him, a faint smile on her lips "Family isn't perfect but you have to keep pretending they aren't going to mess up the next time and they'll do the same for you because family is unconditional love. No matter what a jerk you are, your family still hopes you won't be the next time you come to call. You don't have to like family, you just have to love them, is that so hard."

Ironically, he laughed "You obviously haven't met my family."


	22. Family

Karen gauged that about a week had gone by since Derek's birthday but it had all been a bit of a blur. Eileen had gotten them a theatre, meaning that they were actually rehearsing in view of going to Broadway. That was huge for Karen, she remembered the problems that Bombshell had had in those first few months after previews. She supposed her leaving hadn't helped much but there was no dwelling on it now.

Still, getting the theatre had caused Derek to step up his rehearsals big time. At least, it was either that or he was trying to distract himself from the imminent meeting with his family. After a lot of convincing, Karen had got Derek to call his sister and arrange a lunch with his mother.

As it happened, that lunch was today. Though Derek had invited Karen along, she had thought it would be best for him to go on his own. Somehow she reckoned he had to face these issues on his own before they could begin the relationship she wanted.

"Jesus, Wendy Brown are you with us today?" Derek cried, rubbing his temples as they ran the scene between Branwell and Lydia Robinson. That left the majority of the cast sitting out and they'd ran this scene a ridiculous amount of times. Everyone was getting restless, especially Derek. From her place, cross-legged, on the floor by Elizabeth, Karen had a perfect view of the ever-ticking clock. She could see lunch approaching better than anyone.

It seemed that Derek was completely oblivious to the time. He usually was when he was so wrapped up in his work but Karen was worried this time. This was a lunch date she was well aware Derek couldn't miss. Just as she was about to stop the rehearsal herself, she didn't need to.

"Bloody hell baby brother, don't murder the poor girl," the studio doors swished open and two men paced in. One was tall and lanky, with jet black hair and a lofty stature. The other was a little smaller and broader in the shoulder, his hair was mousy but their eyes were identical. Equally, the angle of each of their jaws was identical to that of Derek's.

Derek turned his head, lightening fast and his face broke into a grin "David Dare-Devil Wills, I told you to meet me outside."

"A lot of people tell me to do a lot of things, Derek," the smaller man leant in the door frame "You of all people should know that I usually don't obey."

The director smirked "You and me both."

"Well, Tom Leavitt, fancy seeing you here," the taller man sauntered in, donned with scarlet scarves.

As though his seat was red hot, Tom jumped up, his chair scraping back as he did so "Freddie, er, hi."

"That's lunch everybody," Derek called, scuttling straight across to Karen and smiling nervously at her "Wish me luck."

Reaching up to cup his face with her hand, she met his smile "You'll be fine. Now go have fun." He left her with a peck on the cheek and Karen crossed her fingers, hoping for the best.

ssssss

Watching the exchange between Tom and Freddie, Sam cocked his head to one side. Ivy elbowed him, frowning slightly and he simply shrugged in response. Even as the three Wills boys wandered out, something in Sam's stomach twitched in suspicion.

So, while various groups in the cast left to run for lunch, Sam hopped to his feet and strolled over to the creative team's desk. With a small smile, the dancer asked "Do you know Derek's brothers?"

"Yeah, both of them, at the beginning of his career all three of Derek's siblings stuck to him like glue," Tom shrugged, shuffling through his papers and avoiding Sam's gaze "Remember, that show Derek and I worked on before Bombshell, that was one of his earliest shows, one or the other of them was in just about every day."

Raising an eyebrow, Sam reached out to tilt Tom's face towards him "And how well did you know the tall, dark, handsome one who looked at you like he knew every inch of you?"

"Freddie?" Tom smiled nervously "Well I may know him a little better than David and Emma." It was a testament to how well they knew each other that Sam merely needed to quirk his eyebrow and Tom elaborated "Look we may have dated but we broke up over the way Derek acted towards me after our show flopped, I haven't seen him in years."

With a smile, Sam leant down and pecked Tom's lips "Just as long as I know to keep my eye on him."

"Sam," Tom scolded "You have nothing to worry about."

He chuckled "I'm not worried, I'm just aware of a possible threat."

"Sam."

"Oh shut up, white boy, I'm messing with you," Sam kissed Tom once more.

dddddd

Saying that this meeting was awkward was the biggest understatement of the decade. Derek was sat between David and Emma with his mother opposite. Rose Wills was a small woman with sharp eyes, a condescending smirk and a tendency to be a commitment-phobe. How he had come out of that woman was something her could never figure out.

"So, how have you been, Derek dear?" Rose asked, picking over her food restlessly.

Looking up, Derek realised that something was missing but he couldn't place what "I got in touch with Kate again."

"Oh yeah, I saw her at your birthday party," Emma commented as she reached for her drink.

Brightly, Rose sat up a little straighter "Ooh, are you two getting back together?" Emma laughed and choked on her orange juice.

With a glare in his little sister's direction, he replied "No, Mum, we're just friends now."

"Well, she was always too good for you anyway," Freddie commented, a tease in his voice as he eyed his older brother.

Before he could think about it, Derek had chuckled and let his guard down "You got that right, Fredo." It was too easy to forget that his family could hurt him. The four Wills siblings had been close since their parents' separation just after Freddie was born and it was all too easy to let those walls down.

"Why don't you go after her again then, she married?" David asked, smiling slyly "Even so, that's never stopped you before."

Elbowing him, Derek retorted "Have you ever thought that I may have moved on from my childhood sweetheart?"

"No," his three siblings chimed, then started laughing. All Rose could do was glance between her children, searching for the inside joke they all shared.

Incredulously, he stopped them "Actually, I'll have you know, I've met someone else."

"Met someone else," Freddie smirked "Or sleeping with someone else."

He didn't know why he did it, but Derek found himself correcting his brother, almost jokingly "In love with someone else." Shock filled his face as he stopped short. This was unreal, how right it felt to say that. With a nervous chuckle, he admitted "I haven't even told her that yet."

"And you haven't slept with her yet!" Emma exclaimed.

Mouth gaping slightly, David choked out "You're in love with a girl you haven't even slept with yet!"

"Love isn't just about sex, you know," Derek felt a little defensive and the words came tumbling out before he could stop himself "And while we're dropping bombshells, Kate is back in my life because her daughter is working for me. A daughter who is almost eighteen and I am the father of."

All of them fell silent and Derek realised that this wasn't the best way to give his family that bit of news. Then his thoughts drifted. This wasn't his family, not all of it anyway and that was the thing that was missing. For this to be his family he needed Karen and Elizabeth here. His brothers and sister used to be all that mattered to him, now he needed his girls. Taking a shaky breath, Derek looked round the table "I guess I haven't talked to any of you guys in awhile."

"Our loss," Rose commented, looking at her second son, levelly "Now when do I get to meet my granddaughter?"

cccccc

Ever since the day after the party, Charlie and Elizabeth were tentatively back together. He had to admit though, that he was weary of the feelings that Elizabeth may still harbour for Harry and his own heart was often a little distracted. Nevertheless, he was eager to keep her.

Lunch was running a little longer than usual because Derek had yet to return. The two were sat cross-legged behind the behind the piano. They'd already finished eating and now were chatting quietly together.

Cocking his head to one side, Charlie asked "Any idea where your Dad's gone?"

"Karen said he was meeting his family," she answered with a slight shrug.

His eyes glinted slightly as he pointed out "Aren't you his family?"

"Yeah but I doubt the family he's meeting even know I exist," she rolled her eyes "I think he at least wants to tell them, before he presents me to them."

Slowly, he shuffled forward until his face was inches from hers "I like your rational thought, Lizzie, but be honest, you're kind of upset that he didn't invite you along today." For a moment, she just stared at him, biting her lip to hold in the emotion. Then she dived into his arms and he fell back under the momentum. Nevertheless his arms closed around her and he kissed her head "Hey, it's okay, just tell me about it."

She wasn't crying but she was close as she babbled "I just feel like he's ashamed of me, like he's hiding me from them. I hate it, it makes me feel dirty and unwanted and-"

"Everyone!" Derek's voice echoed around the studio, cutting Elizabeth off mid-sentence "You better be warmed up because we're starting in five. Where is my daughter?"

Someone said that they were behind the piano and Charlie swore under his breath. The two of them leapt apart, but didn't have time to neaten their appearances before Derek peered round. He took one look at them both, shot Charlie a glare and pulled Elizabeth to her feet. Even though he'd got off easy, a sliver of guilt and foreboding crept through his veins as he followed the two of them out.

The studio was a picture of chaos. Dancers were hastily stretching, everyone else was by the piano for vocal warm-ups as the pianist picked his way over the dancers mid-split on the floor. Meanwhile, in the doorway, there was a small sharp woman, the two men from before and the girl who had crashed Derek's birthday party. The creative team, especially Eileen, were eyeing the group at the door with great suspicion and apprehension. Then there was Karen who was stood in the centre of the room observing everything in the same way he was.

Derek marched Elizabeth across the room, his hand on her arm. Once they were in front of the group of people by the door, he stopped and Charlie smiled. It looked like Derek was introducing Elizabeth to the rest of his family.

Satisfied that his girl was okay, he slid into his place at the piano, beside Ivy.

eeeeee

Derek's family had stayed for the entirety of the rehearsal and it seemed like he was taking them all out afterwards. Well aware that she had a very small window of opportunity, Eileen paced into the women's wash-room where Rose was re-applying her ruby-red lipstick.

The producer was straight to the point. She met Rose's eyes in the mirror and spoke plainly "I want to make this very clear, I'm all for Derek and you playing happy families and I think it's great that you're so accepting of Lizzie, but it just about destroys Derek every time you leave. So, this is the last time you get to waltz back into his life. If you leave again, you don't get to come back."

"And what right have you to say that?" she asked, turning to Eileen with an outraged expression painted across her face "My son has a right to make his own choices."

With a nod, the producer retorted "Yes, he also has a right to be able to live his life knowing where he stands with you."

"I don't live my life by someone else's parameters, my relationship with my son is my business and I don't appreciate you interfering!" Rose shouted, dusty-brown flyaway hair twitching as she spun to face the taller woman.

Icily, Eileen looked down on Derek's mother "You can live your life however you want, just don't screw-up my friend's in the process."

"You are not his mother, I am," she grabbed her hand-bag and made for the door "I can mess him up any way I want, that's what parents do."

As she walked away, Eileen sent one last comment after her "I may not be his mother, but I can make up for the short-falls of the mother he never had."


	23. The In-Laws

**Author Note – Sorry it's taken me so long to update, I've recently discovered tumblr and been rather distracted for the past few days. Between that and keeping up with coursework, I've gotten a little behind. Anyway, enjoy...**

It had been about a week since Derek's family had re-emerged and at least one of them had been in the rehearsal room every day. Somewhere in that time, Ivy and David had started flirting and he had invited her to one of his concerts.

Front row seats for two. She liked David. He wasn't too young for her, like Charlie. He was already jaded enough that she couldn't damage him, like she could Charlie. He was handsome and not in the boy-next-door way Charlie was. He was perfect for her on paper and yet, at every opportunity she compared or related him to Charlie. It was like her brain was set on Charlie-mode and she couldn't switch it. Even when he gave her the tickets, the first person she thought of taking was Charlie.

Ivy thought she was a masochist. As some sort of therapy, she decided to compromise. Instead of taking Charlie to the concert, she took Elizabeth. It wasn't like she felt like she might die every time she looked at Charlie's almost prepubescent girlfriend at all.

"Thanks for bringing me along," Elizabeth smiled as they took their seats.

Shrugging, Ivy replied "Well, I think it's good for you to see your uncle at work."

"You know," the younger girl smiled sheepishly "I always used to wonder where my love for theatre came from, since my mum's family is pretty ordinary. Now it turns out my dad's family consists of a flautist, a singer, a dancer, a pianist and my dad himself is a multi-award-winning director."

Before she knew it, Ivy found herself at ease "You should try growing up with my mother."

Then the lights dipped and all eyes were drawn to the stage as brass toned the air. David strolled onto the stage as though he owned it, and his voice carried through the speakers, loud and clear. Just like Derek, David could hold your attention without even trying. Every song, every note was perfect and sung with confidence. He loved this, she could tell.

Then, halfway through his set, he walked to the front of the stage and smiled goofily at the audience "Okay, now this is the part of the show I talk to you guys, usually, but today there is someone rather special in the audience that I want you all to meet. Two people, as a matter of fact." He squatted down right in front of Ivy and Elizabeth and offered his hand to the former "Ladies and gentleman, a very dear friend of mine, Miss Ivy Lynn, and my niece, Lizzie Jones."

He helped them up onto the stage, to the sound of thunderous applause. Grinning, he stood between the two of them "Now, these two happen to be outrageously talented so, I figure, the three of us should sing a little something."

"Sure, I'm game," Lizzie shrugged and Ivy could do nothing but nod.

As they moved about the stage, singing Easy Money by Billy Joel, Ivy was convinced that she would never feel more like a star.

ffffff

Freddie liked Elizabeth. She was sweet, optimistic but sarcastic enough to hold his attention and wit. So he'd picked her up that morning and the two of them were now walking to the theatre together.

He observed her quietly for a few moments and then asked "How's my big brother doing as a father, then?"

"Good, I guess," she shrugged, with a small smile "I don't really have anyone to compare him to, he's pretty protective a lot of the time, and he can be a little irrational but I know that he cares... he definitely cares."

Pensively, Freddie considered that it had been that certainty they'd lacked as children. He'd certainly never known that his father cared, nor his mother for that matter. Neither of their parents had been particularly affectionate, as Sondheim once said, they were institutionalised children "meaning one who has no contact with any kind of family. You're in, though it's luxurious, you're in an environment that supplies you with everything but human contact... no parents, and yet plenty to eat, and friends to play with and a warm bed." They did okay though, the four Wills children, they had each other at least so, though neglected, they were perfectly happy. It was only looking back that Freddie realiesed how very deprived they were.

"Protective huh? That I can see," Freddie chuckled "Any boys who came after me or Emma got a thorough talking to from both David and Derek before they could get anywhere near us." She laughed at that but didn't comment any further until her companion probed "Aren't you with that Charlie boy?"

Slowly, she nodded "Yeah, ever since just before previews, why?"

"I don't know," he frowned, cocking his head to one side so his dark curls flopped goofily "I guess I thought he was a little old for you."

That got Elizabeth thinking. So many people seemed to habe things to say about her relationship with Charlie, she'd never had this problem with Harry. Maybe it was because Harry had been so ordinary. He was just the guy that girls wanted to be with. All bright smiles, kind heart and great hair. You just couldn't fault him. They were the same age, of the same mind. By all accounts, her and Harry had been perfect for each other. She couldn't even remember why she'd broken up with him.

"Er, earth to Lizzie," he waved a hand in front of her eyes as they wandered up to the theatre "You've zoned out, darlin'."

Blinking out of her trance, she shook her head "Sorry, I'm just a little out-of-it today."

"You might want to sort that out before you go into rehearsal with Derek, I dread to think what he does to people who are off their game," Freddie laughed and held the door open for her. Almost as soon as they were inside, Elizabeth shot off to get ready and Freddie was left alone.

With a sigh he turned and headed into the auditorium, which was empty except for Tom Leavitt sat scribling on a script. Now there was a man he'd though he'd never thought would sashay back into his life the way he had. Derek said that he was engaged now, which was a bit of a revelation because Tom was a commitment-phobe and then some.

That had suited them fine. It wasn't like either of them had put a label on their fooling around but they had been exclusive. Nothing was ever discussed but Freddie had known that there were some deep-rooted feelings there, maybe even love. All he knew for sure was that Tom didn't just blame Derek for ruining that little show that he couldn't even remember the name of now, he also blamed Derek for the failure of his relationship with Freddie.

Taking a deep breath, he paced across the theatre and flopped down next to he ex "Has anyone ever told you that you're really cute when you're working."

"Has anyone ever told you that you shouldn't interupt a composer when he's working?" Tom replied without looking up.

With a subtle smirk, Freddie remembered when Tom had sat in his bedroom surrounded by music and manuscript pouting up at him "I think you know the answer to that, Tom."

"You know, Freddie, I am engaged," he looked up now, his blue eyes sharp and defensive.

Unphased, Freddie shrugged "Yeah, I know, that doesn't mean I'm not allowed to talk to you, does it?"

"No, no, of course not," Tom blushed. After all these years, Freddie could still make him blush and he was rather proud about that. All of Tom's buttons were so easy to press and Freddie knew exactly where they were. Awkwardly, the composer explained "I just didn't want you to get the wrong impression."

Lightly, Freddie laughed "Darlin' I can read you like a book, you couldn't give me the wrong impression if you tried."

"A lot can change in seventeen years, Freddie," Tom turned back to his notes.

Still investigating Tom's face, he commented "Yeah, I know, people win Tonys, earn pots of money, get engaged-"

"Become professional gold-diggers," Tom teased, his eyes flicking up to gauge Freddie's reaction.

Freddie laughed, a real belly-laugh "I'll have you know that I earn good money as a poet."

"A poet, really?" Tom quirked an eyebrow "And you're not living off your various boyfriends at all?"

Just like all of the Wills children, Freddie's smirk was legendary "No, I live off my ridiculously successful siblings instead." That got both of them laughing and Tom slapping Freddie's arm playfully. Anyone watching might have thought that they were flirting.

Sam was watching.

In full costume, Sam paced across the auditorium, from the stage. Instinctively, Tom turned to see him coming and stopped laughing. He stood up and intercepted his fiance "Freddie, have you met my fiance, Sam."

Seeing the suspiscion and anger in the smaller man's eyes, Freddie pasted on his most charming smile "No, I don't believe I have. Tom and I were just catching up." Sam didn't say anything just stared him down, even as Tom laid a calming hand on his chest. As he stood up to greet him, Freddie continued "I must say, you're a genius getting Tom to settle down, I could never even get him to admit I was his boyfriend. He must really love you, now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go and find my brother."

With that, he left, knowing that he had difused the situation and feeling quite proud of the fact.

kkkkkk

Meeting your boyfriend's family was always nerve-racking. When your boyfriend was Derek Wills and his family were some of the foremost figures in music and theatre, it was terrifying. Karen was panicking.

Completely unable to sit still, Karen paced back and forth, every now-and-again stopping to check on dinner. Derek watched her, half-bewildered and completely at a loss as to how to calm her. Still she kept pacing, kept anxiously checking on the food, kept glancing at the clock on the wall.

"Darlin'," Derek stood up "My family aren't going to eat you, you know?" She paused and looked at him, brown eyes wide. It reminded him of the night she'd come to his apartment the first time, that stunned baby-bird expression that turned his heart to butter. This girl would be the death of him.

Nervously, she asked "What if they don't like me? Emma already doesn't like me. What if they convince you to break up with me? What-"

"What if the world explodes in the next ten minutes?" he raised a teasing eyebrow, taking slow steps towards her "What if my mother takes off again? What if your hair catches on fire? Karen, none of it matters, whatever happens today I... I'm not going anywhere."

As his hands rested on her arms, she searched his eyes "These people matter to you Derek, let's not pretend that you'll be able to get past it if they don't like me."

"You're being paranoid," he kissed her forehead, inhaling her scent "None of them could stop me from wanting you by my side, trust me here."

The doorbell rang and Karen jumped. At the same time the kitchen timer started bleeping. Seeing the panicked expression on her face, Derek told her "Look, I'll deal with dinner, you get the door and remember, all my family is here, including you, Elizabeth and Kate, you are not alone here."

Smiling weakly, she darted off for the door. It was David, his weight on one leg and his eyes mischievous "Why hello there, Miss Cartwright."

"David," she forced a bright smile though her stomach still twisted painfully.

He didn't wait for her to invite him in, just strolled in, pecking her cheek as he moved past her "You don't have to look so scared, we're not going to eat you."

"That's what Derek said," Karen admitted as she closed the door behind him.

With a smirk identical to Derek's, he told her "We're of the same mind, him and I. Which means, I like you, by the way, so you don't have to worry about impressing me."

"How did you..." she trailed off as he winked at her and paced towards the living room, shouting boisterously for his brother.

Karen didn't get the chance to follow him because the doorbell rang again almost immediately. In fact, within a few minutes all of the guests were present and accounted for. To give Derek some time with his family, Karen hid away in the kitchen and got dinner sorted out until Kate walked through.

"You don't have to hide from them Karen, they're going to love you," Kate leant in the doorway, watching her curiously.

Glancing up, Karen stuttered "I-I am not hiding, I am getting dinner ready."

"Look, I know the Willses are intimidating, believe me I do, and they are very close which can be odd and make you think that they will never accept you but, the fact is, all they want is for Derek to be happy," Kate smiled, placing a supportive hand on her arm "And you make him happy, so, come on, let's show them how brilliant you are."

The two women carried dinner through to the table, Kate calling "Everyone, dinner's up!" Once everyone was settled, Kate took the initiative to make sure everyone knew each other. Karen couldn't even begin to explain how grateful she was for Kate's presence at that moment.

"So, Karen, what part do you play in Derek's little production?" Rose asked, talking of Brontë the way a parent might speak of their child's nativity play.

With a small smile, she glanced at Derek, beside her "Er, Emily Brontë."

"Not the lead, then," Rose commented, her expression icy.

The way she said it was so cold and judgemental that Karen couldn't find a way to reply, luckily for her, Elizabeth intervened "No, but the best part in the show, technically my role's bigger but I'd still kill to get that part."

"I guess Karen should watch her back then," David joked.

Cringing slightly, Derek eyed his daughter "Give it a few years, sweetheart, you're barely old enough to play Anne."

"A girl can dream, can't she?" Elizabeth stuck her tongue out at her father.

Quickly, Kate slapped her arm "Manners, Lizzie."

"Really mum?" the teenager rolled her eyes.

As though she hadn't heard the rest of the conversation, Rose asked "Karen, have you won any awards yet?"

"No, aside from an audience-choice for best replacement in Les Mis, not really no," Karen babbled, feeling decidedly uncomfortable.

Pursing her lips, Derek's mother pointed out "By the time Derek was your age, he had two Tony awards and an Olivier."

"Don't forget three giant egos!" Freddie laughed, trying to diffuse the tension.

Already, however, Karen felt she wasn't good enough. It was very clear that Rose didn't like her, more than that, she was doing her best to convince everyone that Karen deserved nothing but scorn.

Under the table, Derek grabbed Karen's hand "I'll have you know, Frederick, that my ego has never been any larger than it should be."

"Exactly, what I have a problem with is people looking above their station," Rose commented as in indirect insult to Karen. A silence fell over them all as they caught Rose's glare across the table at Karen.

Awkwardly, Kate smiled "This food is really lovely Karen."

"Thank-"

"Well pasta isn't rocket-science is it?" Rose cut Karen off.

Releasing Karen's hand, Derek jumped to his feet "Enough, mum, can you just lay off for two seconds!"

"Shall we have some music," Emma suggested "David, why don't you play us something on the piano?"

Derek glared at his sister "Don't change the subject Em, I know you don't want us to fight but no-one insults my girl on my watch, especially not my bloody mother."

"Don't talk to your sister like that!" Rose ordered as tears welled in Emma's eyes and she whimpered something about just wanting them to be a family again. As though it was second-nature, David and Kate began to clear away plates before they started to get thrown, it occurred to Karen that these kind of fights were reasonably common at the Wills's dinner table. Already, Freddie was moving into the empty seat that David had left by Emma's side and was holding her hand as she cried.

Meanwhile, Derek and Rose continued to shout at each other "Don't do that, Mum, don't pretend you actually raised us and didn't abandon us before Freddie could even talk!"

"Your father and I were incompatible!"

"But, between the two of you, you made us such irreparable commitment-phobes that, between the four of us we have had only three stable relationships! And, now that I may have actually found someone who could be endgame for me, all you can do is make her feel small and unwanted but, you know what?" Derek turned to Karen, pulled her to her feet and kissed her right there. Before she knew it, her arms had wound about his neck and he had deepened the kiss, resting his hands on her hips. When they finally had to come up for air, he broke away and turned to his mother "Screw you."

Karen had never loved that man more.

dddddd

It was hours after the disastrous dinner. Everyone had gone home and Derek had received a call from Emma telling him that his mother had taken off again. That wasn't a surprise to him but it still hurt a little, especially knowing that it was sort-of his fault. What mad it worse was that he knew Emma would be crying into Freddie's shoulder right now. His little sister never seemed to get used to the fact that their mother never stuck around for long.

Now he was alone in his apartment and sort-of wishing that Karen had stuck around, instead of going back to her apartment. It was a lonely city.

Then a voice drifted from his trophy-room "_Happy birthday to you..._"

He sat up, setting down the drink he'd been nursing and searching for the source of the sound.

"_...Happy birthday to you..._"

The door to his trophy-room swung open and Karen walked slowly, seductively out wearing nothing but underwear and one of his white shirts. His eyes practically popped out of his head, this had to be a dream. There was no way Karen had been hidden in his trophy-room since the dinner-party... Then again, he rarely went in there and he couldn't remember exactly seeing her leave.

Now she was on his lap, thighs either side of him and he swallowed as she continued to sing "_...Happy birthday Mr President, Happy birthday to you._" She kissed him and he kissed back, all other thoughts except her leaving his head. All that was, was him and her and them.

Laying her down on the leather settee, he was all-too-aware of the leg that had just wrapped around his waist. Before he lost all rational thought, he pulled away and searched her eyes "Are you sure about this?"

"Why wouldn't I be?" she breathed, reaching up to play with the ends of his hair at the back of his neck.

His heart racing, he shook his head "I don't know."

"I trust you Derek, I'm ready for this, I'm ready to trust you with this," she smiled at him, then lifted her head to press her lips to his.

Derek felt like the luckiest man in the world.


	24. Lights Audience

**Author Note – This is the second to last chapter of Twists and Turns, I'm almost sad to come to the end but I think it's run its course now. Thank you for the comments and support, prepare for the end.**

It felt like a dream to Derek. Here was Karen in his bed next to him, sleeping peacefully and looking like an angel. She was his angel, the one who'd saved him from everything he was before. Not that this was the first time he'd woken up with her next to him but this time it wasn't an accident of affection or an aching awakening on a sofa. This was how it was meant to be.

He stretched his neck to look round at the clock on his bedside table and cringed at the time. They were about ten minutes behind time already and they were in the middle of tech. It looked like he would have to wake her up.

Thinking about it for a second, he smiled as an idea came to him. He leant over her and pressed his lips to hers. It took her a moment but she began to blearily kiss back. As he pulled away, he met her bright chocolate gaze and beamed "Good morning."

"Hey," she breathed, glancing around herself "I think I could get used to this.

With a chuckle, he nodded "Me too, but right now we need to get to rehearsals."

"Five more minutes," she groaned, pulling the covers up over her head so only a couple auburn curls were still visible. It was the most adorable thing he'd ever seen.

Five more minutes wasn't that long.

tttttt

"_Oh, oh, oh I want anon-anon-anonymous sex with a stranger that I met in a bar_!" Ivy and Sam entertained the rest of the cast as they waited for Derek and Karen to arrive. In full period costume they sung, making fun of trying to be sexy. It was hilarious. Especially when Sam tried to get closer to her and bumped into her large dress.

It never ceased to amaze Tom, how much a cast became a family. The world of theatre was competitive, bitchy and risky but this tight-knit group would never be lost. This was the best of his work, this love, this friendship, this trust. All of them relied on each other in one way or another.

"Good to see you're all warming up," Derek commented as he paced into the auditorium and made for the director's chair. There was snark in his tone but, still, a bright smile on his face like a kid on Christmas morning.

It took Tom a moment to realise what could make Derek Wills this happy.

"Karen's just getting changed, she'll be with us shortly, in the meantime let's run that scene that was giving us a headache yesterday."

He arrived with Karen.

Somebody got some last night.

As everyone moved into their places, Tom thought about how much better Derek was now that he had Karen. She was good for him. Whether he could say the same about him being good for her, only time would tell.

eeeeee

Elizabeth couldn't quite believe that her father had let her out of rehearsals early to go back to her old school. Admittedly, she was going to publicise the show to her ex-classmates but they were in the middle of tech, it had been a long shot. Now she was sat at the back of her school auditorium as the whole school year filed in, looking very confused.

Another thing that she hadn't expected was that the school would take the entire year out of lessons and into a special assembly, just for her.

Suddenly, someone stopped in the line to stare at her. Harry. With an awkward smile, she waved weakly and he dropped his head and walked on. It broke her heart.

Though months had passed since she'd ended it with Harry, it still hurt her. Which was ridiculous. After all it was her who had broke it off. Besides that she was happy with Charlie wasn't she? What did she need her ex-boyfriend for? Nevertheless, seeing him so downtrodden had set her on edge.

By the time she made her way up to the stage, she was buzzing with nerves. She only half-heard her old headmaster's glowing introduction as she took up the microphone to the sound of applause.

Smiling bashfully, she chuckled a little "Thanks for that introduction but I hardly doubt I'll meet expectation." Once the noise had quieted, Elizabeth took a deep breath "It's really great to be back here, don't laugh, I actually mean that. I guess I miss getting some time out of rehearsal to chill out with you guys. I left this school to pursue a career on the stage and, I think I've maybe lost myself a little in the process, but coming back here has reminded me that I should really call some of you more. Anyway my new show starts next week and I would love it if you guys could come and see me, the English department is running a school trip as well. It's called Brontë, I play Anne and this song is called By the Sea."

She took another breath and involuntarily found Harry's eyes in the crowd "_We'd come here when the sun shone,_

_We'd sit out on the sand,_

_With blankets to rest on,_

_And someone to hold my hand._

_All it is to be needed,_

_All it is to be of help,_

_How I loved being useful,_

_Before I lost them all._

_I miss my girls,_

_I miss my work,_

_With golden curls..._"

As Harry's eyes bored into her, even as he sat amongst hundreds of other people. Her heart race and, not for the first time, something occurred to her.

What if Charlie wasn't end-game for her?

What if she was meant to be with Harry?

Later, when she left the school after a long discussion with her teachers and friends about how she'd been doing, she found Harry waiting. It reminded her of how he would meet her at the stage door when she was in Teenage Kicks. That adorable way that he would lean back on the wall, his hair shading his eyes could still turn her insides to butter. He hadn't changed a jot, expect that there was a little sadness in his eyes and heaviness in his shoulders.

"Hey," she half-smiled, stopping to stand in front of him.

Matching her expression, he stood a little straighter "Hey, you were great in there."

"I better have been, otherwise I'm pretty much screwed for opening," she laughed and he laughed two and she remembered that he was her best friend, even though they weren't together any more.

With a shake of his head, he pointed out "You're always brilliant, Lizzie, whatever you do."

"That's a lie," she lowered her gaze, nervously.

Quietly, he chuckled "No it's not but it's sweet that you think it is, this is a really good show for you isn't it?"

"I guess it isn't hard to sing about things you regret when you have the right motivation," she commented as she searched his eyes.

Silence.

Clearing her throat, she looked back over her shoulder at where her mum had just pulled up "Come to opening night, I get two tickets, Mum gets one and I want you to take the other."

"Are you sure?" he asked, eyes wide and surprised.

She left a kiss on his cheek and called over her shoulder as she left "Of course I am, my best friend has to be at the opening to my show."

kkkkkk

Karen was the last of the cast to leave the theatre, she was heading back to her apartment to grab a few things before going over to Derek's again. As she passed the door to the auditorium, she heard Tom and Julia talking.

They were sat on the front row of seats, his arm around her shoulders as they looked up at the stage. From her place in the doorway, she could just make out what they were saying.

"It's great show, Julia."

"I know but so many good shows go down despite how good they are."

"But it's very rare, we're going to be okay, everything is brilliant."

"You know I go all psycho before most of our shows well-"

"Wow, I never thought I'd hear you admit that."

"Well, this time round I'm just really, really scared about what the opening's going to bring, this is the best work we've written in years, we have to get this right."

"I know, I've been feeling the same but that's okay because I trust the cast to deliver and I trust that this work is glorious."

"We'll be okay?"

"Yeah, we'll be okay."

With a smile, Karen walked away before they noticed her standing there. This was going to be one of those shows that ran for years, she could feel it.

More than that had come from this, however, she'd met the man she could see herself spending the rest of her life with. Maybe, just maybe, he could be the one.


	25. Brontë

The air was cool and crisp as Derek and David walked towards the theatre. Their matching smirks never faltered and their steps fell in practised time as they strolled. Warm mist drifted from their coffee cups and the wind ruffled their hair.

"Admit it, you're nervous," David nudged his younger brother with his elbow.

Blinking, Derek half-smiled in reply "Not really, I mean, I trust Karen, I trust all of them to pull this off. My work is safe in their hands and I'm proud of it."

"I'm not talking about the show, you know?" he laughed "I'm talking about the fact that you are going to tell Karen you love her tonight."

It took Derek a moment to process what his brother had said "What?"

"You're going to tell her you love her tonight," David repeated, observing the director's puzzled expression.

With a shake of his head, Derek argued "I think it's too early for that, I don't want to scare her off."

"But you don't deny it," David pointed out, leaving his brother gaping for a response. After a few moments of amusing silence, David chuckled "Never mind, but look, I had an idea about a possible project for the Wills family."

Shaking his mind free of their previous conversation, he rubbed the back of his neck "You have?"

"Yeah, we've never worked with each other and I think it's about time we did," David grinned and threw an arm over his brother's shoulders "So, Songs for a New World, directed by Derek Wills, starring Freddie Wills as Man 1, Emma Wills as Woman 2, David Wills as Man 2 and Elizabeth Mason as Woman 1. It'll be brilliant."

Quietly, Derek sighed "Brontë isn't over yet."

"No, but how long does a director actually need to stick around after opening?" David pointed out as they reached the theatre "It'd be a brilliant show, anyway think about it and break a leg out there tonight."

As David began to walk away, Derek shouted after him "I'm not actually doing anything tonight, my show's just opening." The older man simply winked and disappeared round the corner. Sometimes, he thought his brother knew him better than he did.

eeeeee

Signing in at the stage door, Elizabeth skimmed down the list of names. These people she hadn't known less than a year ago were now people she couldn't imagine living without. There were chorus girls who'd become her best friends, fellow leads who'd mentored her, even Ivy had been a great friend to her over the last few weeks. Then there was Charlie...

"Lizzie," Reagan tapped Elizabeth's shoulder "There's a boy at the stage door who's asking for you."

Frowning, she turned and retraced her steps to the door. As she swung open the heavy door, her heart jumped and her eyes came to rest on a familiar face "Harry?"

"Hey," he smiled awkwardly and waved a little.

Without knowing why, Elizabeth glanced around for Charlie, as though there was something going on "What are you doing here?"

For a few moments, he stood staring at her, his mouth gawking a little. Eventually, he managed to choke out "I don't really know..." After the silence hung for a few more agonising seconds he commented "We're off school today, in honour of your opening."

"Mr Minnelli, always so proud of the achievements of students he barely has contact with," Elizabeth laughed, remembering all the times their headmaster had talked about her as though he was her personal acting coach and advisor.

Trying to match her expression, he smiled weakly "Always so cynical, the whole school is proud of you, Lizzie, they just want to celebrate your success."

"Are they going to have a day off every time I open a show?" she shook her head, moving out of the way of the door as a couple of the stage hands walked in.

With a shrug, Harry pointed out "Doesn't matter much to me, unless you open another show in the next few months."

"Oh yeah, I forgot that this is your senior year," she smiled a little apologetically "Have you picked out a college?"

Before he could answer, Tom appeared at the stage door "Lizzie, your father wants to run By The Sea one last time for lighting, could you come in?"

"Er, sure Tom, give me a minute," she replied and, once he was back in the theatre, she hurried to Harry's side. Taking his hand, Elizabeth leant into her ex-boyfriend "You have to promise me you'll be in the audience tonight, I always feel so much safer knowing you're in the room."

Shakily, he nodded "Since I've got a free ticket anyway, why would I miss it." Beaming at him for a second, she pecked his cheek and darted inside.

It was then that Charlie walked up to the stage door. His face creased in confusion "Hey, Harry, what are you doing here?"

"I just came to wish Lizzie good luck for tonight," he shrugged, eyeing the older boy with suspicion.

Nodding slowly, he narrowed his eyes "Right, okay, just a little reminder that I'm her boyfriend, okay? So don't get any ideas."

"Huh," Harry threw considering glance in Charlie's direction, as though he was realising something.

Nervously, Charlie took a step back "What?"

"You don't trust her," Harry half-smiled, then turned to leave, shrugging slightly "I always trusted Lizzie, I still do, but you don't."

As he began to walk away, Charlie reached for Harry's shoulder and turned him to face him again, viscously "What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means," Harry jerked away from the actor's touch "That maybe I know her better than you do, maybe I feel her a little better than you do and maybe I'm more right for her than you." Seconds, maybe even minutes, passed, the two of them staring each other out. When it became clear that Charlie didn't have a response to that, Harry just shook his head "And you know what? I don't even think you care about that, she's just a passing phase for you, isn't she? Well, she deserves better than that and I just hope she realises that, but if you hurt her, so help me I will make you wish you were never born." With that, Harry paced off.

Ivy appeared at the stage door just as the teenager was leaving. Frowning, she walked to Charlie's side "What was that about?"

"Elizabeth's ex-boyfriend being protective," Charlie shrugged, trying to ignore the doubt and guilt crawling about his insides. Having Ivy stood there didn't help matters, after all she was the thing he had to feel guilty about. Somewhere inside himself he was still madly in love with Ivy and just when he thought he'd buried those feelings just enough to forget about them, there she would be. All she had to do was stand there, with those sapphire eyes and that perfect platinum hair.

She smiled sympathetically "Come on, Derek wants you and he's so stressed at the moment that he's threatening to castrate you if you don't report for duty in the next ten minutes."

" In that case," he offered her his arm comically and sang softly as they wandered into the theatre "_Would you share your life with me, for the next ten minutes..._"

"You're such a musical theatre nerd."

"Why thank you."

kkkkkk

"Have you boys completely lost your ability to operate a spotlight!"

Karen was not generally a paranoid person.

"Jessica you're meant to look fat in that dress, that's the point."

A part of her knew she was being a little irrational.

"You could do it yesterday, Ivy!"

All the same, she couldn't help the growing feeling...

"Where the bloody hell is Charlie!?"

...that Derek...

"You've missed your cue!"

...was ignoring her.

"And where in God's name is my bloody coffee?"

She was well aware that he was busy with the last minute rehearsals and heaven knows that neither of them had many spare moments right now. Still, when they were working on Bombshell, Derek had constantly made time for her, even when they were knee-deep in preparation. Something inside her was inconsolably nervous that Derek was losing interest in her now that they'd slept together.

"Am I even speaking the same language any more? Have we all suddenly changed musical and I'm directing Les Miserables with a load of method actors who are now speaking exclusively in French?"

As well as this, not only was the show keeping him occupied but she thought that he might be deliberately ignoring her as well. Before rehearsal got properly started he seemed to use every excuse not to talk to her. It was not looking good.

"Karen?" Elizabeth came to sit next to Karen in the wings "Can I ask you something?"

Glancing up from her revelry, the older actress shrugged "Sure."

"If I thought that... if I felt that I liked Harry, maybe a lot better than I like Charlie, should I dump Charlie and go back to Harry?" Elizabeth asked, plainly if awkwardly.

Distracted as she was, Karen didn't think about the question much. She just sighed and admitted "Well, frankly, I don't think you and Charlie are right for each other at all. Ivy still carries a torch for Charlie and he often has eyes only for her. As for you, I've known you a long time and you've always been friends with Harry, the two of you were soul-mates." As she finished, it took Karen a moment to comprehend how startlingly honest she'd been. Blinking, she backtracked "It's still your decision though, you should go with your heart not my mind and I'm really sorry I-"

"Karen, stop, you're right... of course you're right," she interrupted Karen, smiling sadly "Thank you for being so honest."

"Where are the Brontë sisters? I swear to God if we can't get the title song run..."

With a shake of her head, Elizabeth chuckled "We better go out there before Dad burns the theatre down."

tttttt

The whole cast and crew stood in a show circle. Tom looked around the faces of the people who would bring his work alive that night and felt a rush of pride. This was it, the night when it all came together.

"I just want to say what an honour it has been working with all of you," Eileen smiled "And that I'll really miss seeing you all every day. All of us have produced an amazing piece of work together and, whatever happens now, we'll have that."

Being the lyricist of the pair, Julia stepped forward, with a squeeze of Tom's hand, to speak on their behalf "Tom and I, truly believe this work is the best we've ever done, we knew that from that first song that we wrote but we didn't feel how electric it was until you showed us. From that first read through, all of us could feel that energy and what's great is that it hasn't been lost along the way, we are still just as present as we were that first day. The cast we're opening with today is the best either of us could of hoped for and we just want to say a huge thank you to all of you for working on this show." Tom wiped a stray tear from his eye and curled his arms around Julia as she started crying too.

The fact was that, after today, the whole cast, crew and creative team would never be together again in the same way. This was their first and last day at the same time. Especially for the creative team, this was a very emotional time.

"Well now it's my turn, I guess," Derek stepped awkwardly forward "I'm not nearly as sentimental as these crybabies but I can safely say that, both personally and professionally, this is the most extraordinary show I've ever worked on. You've all been and will continue to be amazing in this, so thank you all and I will see you at the Tonys. Now, places everyone and break a leg."

Tom had to admit that he was surprised Derek hadn't mentioned Karen in his speech, or even Elizabeth directly. Nevertheless, he didn't have time to worry about it much. Before they went to take their seats, Tom darted to Sam's side and kissed him quickly.

As he pulled away, Sam frowned "What was that for?"

"Before you go out there, I want you to know that I love you and you are brilliant in this," Tom replied.

Humbly he smiled and winked "Well, next time you write me a part make it bigger." Tom hit his fiancé's arm playfully, kissed him one last time and rushed after Julia.

There were three rows of seats in the auditorium allocated for friends, family and people involved with the production. Tom spotted the boy Elizabeth had been chatting with earlier, sat awkwardly at the end of the row. As he was taking his seat between Julia and Eileen, he waved a little to the Wills Siblings. All the while his stomach was doing back-flips as he tried to convince himself that they were going to be okay. This had to go smoothly, it just had to.

Gradually, the lights went down and Tom tensed up as the tannoy chimed out some information about fire-exits and copyright.

Julia grabbed for his hand and he smiled quietly at her and squeezed her hand in return. This was it, the true birth of the show.

eeeeee

They were in the middle of _Good Morning Mr. Weighton_. Elizabeth hung off of Charlie's arm as he sung in his soft indistinct voice. Looking up at him, Elizabeth realised something, the face she was looking at meant nothing to her, not really. She liked Charlie and his kisses made her tingle but merely looking at Harry could have the same effect and more.

As she broke away from him for the solo, she could feel Harry's presence in the theatre and that was enough. Throughout the rest of the scene, Elizabeth went through the practised motions but her mind was elsewhere, she had to tell Charlie.

Once they were off stage and she was sure that her microphone was off, Elizabeth dived to grab his arm "Charlie, I have something to tell you."

"Can't it wait until after the show, I have to get ready for my funeral?" he replied, rubbing his dog-collar anxiously.

Glancing back over her shoulder, she sighed "I'll make it fast. I think we should call it a day, you like Ivy, I like Harry, let's part on good terms before someone cheats."

"You, little lady," he dropped a kiss on her cheek with a smile "Are brilliant, promise me you'll only settle for the best of the best."

With a smile matching his, Elizabeth replied "I promise, as long as you promise the same."

"Always," he winked and then rushed off to get ready for the funeral scene. It was though a weight had been lifted from her shoulders.

Then, as she headed towards her dressing room to put on her pinafore for the next scene, she saw Charlie blocking the corridor, his arms wrapped around Ivy and his lips pressed to hers. Laughing, Elizabeth commented "Nice going, Charlie, I think that's a new record."

"What can I say," he grinned, resting his forehead on Ivy's "I've been thinking about that for awhile." Somewhere inside her, Elizabeth though she should have been upset that he moved on so fast but she wasn't, just sort-of amused. That was good, it meant she really had done the right thing here. She was ready to go back to Harry.

kkkkkk

The second act was now in its downhill run towards the end of the show and Karen was about to go on for her death scene. The show was going well, startlingly well, more than a few numbers completely stopped the show with applause. Karen was running on a show-high as she made for the back of the stage.

A hand rested on her arm, pausing her progress. The nicest sort of shudder ran threw her veins and she didn't even need to ask who it was to know, which was just as well as she heard the crackle of her microphone turning on. Gently a familiar arm snaked around her waist and a kiss was planted on the shell of her ear.

Without much conviction, she pointed towards her place, trying to signal that she really needed to go. Chuckling dryly, a thick British accent whispered "I know love, just give me a minute." There was a pause as he took a deep breath "I love you."

He pushed her towards her place and she had no choice but to get into position. As the bed moved forward onto the stage, Karen tried to concentrate but all she could think was:

_He loves me._

_He loves me._

_He loves me._

_He loves me._

_He loves me._

_He loves me._

Still, she channelled all that excess energy into the song, remembering that night months ago with just him, her and a backing track. Intensity was essential in this scene. The buzz of the audience fed the insanity needed to make Emily truly believable. She had the whole audience in the palm of her hand, just as she had when she sang _Don't Forget Me_ in Boston.

It was perfect, electric and history in the making. Everyone there knew it. Derek watching from the wings. Julia and Tom still holding hands in the audience. The boys waiting to come on. Harry sat on his own, watching everything with eyes wide. Ivy and Elizabeth watching Karen's performance unfold right in front of them. All of them knew that this was something so incredibly rare and special that few people in the world would get to see.

As the bed, with Karen on it, rolled back off, leaving Ivy and Elizabeth to sing a reprise of _Sweet Sister_, all Karen could think of was Derek Wills. Honestly, she thought that she always performed at her best when Derek was behind her. Something about him was good for her, they needed each other and... more than that...

She took a few moments to lay on the bed, leaving time for her microphone to switch off. Then, quietly, she tiptoed out into the wings, where Derek was watching the performance. There, she slid her hand into his.

He turned to her and smiled serenely. Searching his face a few moments, Karen leant closer to him and breathed "I love you too."

"You have no idea how long I've waited to hear you say that," he grinned.

Sensually, she looked up at him through her eyelashes "Oh I think I do."

And with once kiss, they somehow promised forever and, even now, can be found at each other's sides.

**Author Note – So there it is, thank you so much for your continued support and I hope you've enjoyed it.**


	26. A Note From Me

**Hey guys, sorry, this isn't another chapter. I just wanted to say that I've published a novel called Then and Now by Hannah Hobson. I'm also working on making this story into an original novel about two characters from Then and Now called Fliss and Jasper. I'd love for you to check my new novel out.**

**Go to my website: for more information.**

**Buy Then and Now: . /Then-Now-Hannah-Hobson/dp/1490473831/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1373036348&sr=8-1&keywords=then+and+now+hannah+hobson **

**Read Sample Chapters of Then and Now: en/book/read/201303112049226600**

**Also, I think I'm going to have to take this fic down soon because the follow up novel to Then and Now is basically this fic with slightly different characters. I thought I'd warn you before I did anything though because it only seems fair. You guys have been so great and I wish I didn't have to take it down. Still, publishing basically the same thing officially wouldn't look great when this was still online. Thanks so much for the support from everyone.**

**Thank You **


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